The Poisonous Feather // MHA x DSMP

So you're a God

Guys please don't hate me 🥹 I've been busy..
No excuses, I know. But motivation was THIN.
Anyways, enjoy

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In the darkness of his room, Hawks tugged at his hair sharply, eyes wide and breath stuck in his throat. Deep inside in his nest, he felt trapped.
It was silent. Too silent, yet his mind was screaming, raging. His head hurt, eyes burned. His heart was ablaze, twisted and crushed. His wings, once preened and in perfect condition, now seemed like they haven't been taken care of in years.

He hadn't been taking care of them. Preening was not the same anymore, not when it was his own hands running through the silky feathers. It used to be Tommy's hands, ruffling them and cleaning. Now it was no one's.
His clothes were dirty and smelled of grass. There was a hole in his shirt, above his heart. He had no energy to change.

His nest was thrashed, barely up and unsteady. The blankets were all wrong and twisted. He did not fix it.
The windows in his apartment hadn't been opened in a long time. The curtains were down. The plants had dried out. There was a stack of dirty dishes in his sink.
Old boxes from take out lingered on the floor. He did not get up to clean them.

His phone was laying somewhere in the room, screen facing down and turned off. He hadn't turned in on ever since.
His bed wasn't made. He had no reason to make it. He did not sleep in it. The bill for electricity was screaming to be paid, soon to be cut off. He didn't open it. Has no reason to, the lights always off.

Endeavor visited sometimes. Fuji-sama brought food. Tsukauchi showed up with updates. Hawks did not get up to greet them. He did not open the door. Fuji had a key, for some reason. She would come in, clean up a little. Offer comfort and reassurance. But she was struggling. First her son, now Tommy, who she grew to care as if he a her own. Hell, Hawks cared about him a if he was his son. His fledgling.

His beautiful, innocent feather.

"My fledgling.." Hawks whispered, curled in on himself in his nest, eyes shut tightly. "My innocent fledgling.."

He did not know how he was going to tell Aizawa. It was his fault. Had he been there sooner, he would have done something. Would have helped, saved Tommy. Would have kept him safe.
Aizawa was going to hate him, kill him. Blame him, perhaps. But death would be better than that. More merciful. He couldn't stand being blamed, even if he knew it was his fault in the first place. Because it was.

A few crows stayed outside his windows, watching, chirping. They tapped their beaks against the glass, begging to be let inside, pleading. He did not let them. They would blame him, be disappointed in them.
He hadn't seen Ghost yet.
Boo, who was under his care while Aizawa was off, stayed hidden in her corner under his bed. He could hear her meow sometimes. He had the strength to feed her, because Tommy cared about her. He would be upset if he neglected her.

But Tommy also cared about him, so why didn't he take care of himself, too? Wasn't he disappointing Tommy by not doing so? If he focused hard enough, he could imagine Tommy, mocking him and telling him to get himself together and do something, instead of laying there and looking pathetic. Hawks didn't.

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There was a persistent, loud tapping against his window. It was annoying. And loud.
Hawks' body shifted inside his nest, almost bringing down the top of it on his head. He peaked out, staring at the window eyes narrowed. A familiar beak tapped against the window again, annoyed.
Hawks should probably get up and feed them or something. Should. Not that he would.

A loud caw echoed outside his window, his wings twitched tiredly at the sound. He let out a small, hissing sound, hoping that the persistent bird would leave him alone. It didn't.