Texting Michael
Cliffoconda: buy my mixtape bruh
You: is it fire?
Cliffoconda: idk, maybe. there's gonna be a song called Catch Fire
You: lol
You: it's been on pre-order the second it was available on iTunes
Cliffoconda: I knew I could always count on my band <3
You: don't count on me too much
Cliffoconda: why not?
You: bc every time I see your name in my phone messages, I giggle
Cliffoconda: what's my name in your phone?
Cliffoconda: if u don't tell me I'll sneak up from the depths of hell and attack you
You: ok Cliffoconda
Cliffoconda: omg. really (Y/N), really?
You: yes really
You: you'd think I'd be embarrassed to admit this to you but I have no shame
Cliffoconda: I like it. keep it.
You: I knew you'd like it
You: hey, you wanna know the definition of perfect
Cliffoconda: is it Michael Gordon Clifford?
You: -_- no
You: well technically
You: but that's besides the point
You: perfection doesn't exist. it's a delusion our brains create so we'd compare ourselves to other people, who aren't so perfect either. It's all just one hallucination.
Cliffoconda: tf
Cliffoconda: it's like 2am. go to sleep
You: n e v e r
Cliffoconda: man, what are your parents feeding you?
You: crack
Cliffoconda: what?!
You: what
Cliffoconda: did you just say...
You: no I didn't
Cliffoconda: but...
You: but nothing
You: I'm on pizza
Cliffoconda: (Y/N) !! what the fuck
You: oh for gods sake
You: what's up your ass now
Cliffoconda: share your pizza!!
You: I'm so sorry, but I'm already sharing it with my imaginary friend, Charlie.
Cliffoconda: charlie charlie
Cliffoconda: wait do you actually visualize your imaginary friend
You: yes
Cliffoconda: maybe the crack is kicking in
Cliffoconda: otherwise thats some paranormal activity shit right there
You: or it's the pizza
Cliffoconda: sHARE
You: mehhh
Cliffoconda: I'm coming over whether you like it or not
You: lolz on you, the front door is locked
You: so is the back door, lolz on you again
Cliffoconda: lolz on YOU, I stole your spare key from under the mat last week.
You: YOU WHAt
You: yOU LITTLE FUCKER
You: I FORGOT MY KEYS THE OTHER DAY AND IT WAS POURING RAIN AND I COULDNT FIND THE SPARE KEY SO I WAS STUCK OUTSIDE FOR TWO FUCKING HOURS UNTIL MY PARENTS CAME HOME AND THEN THEY LECTURED ME BC THEY FUCKING THOUGHT I LOST THE SPARE KEY
You: wHeN aLl AlOnG yOu wErE tHe oNe wHo sToLe tHeM
Cliffoconda: Lol
You: fucking fight me you little shit
Cliffoconda: I'm sorry
You: ya know, earlier I was thinking for a couple seconds that it might not hurt to share my pizza with you, but now you ain't gettin any
You: YOU CANT GET SOME
Cliffoconda: F U C K
Spare Key Stealer: I'm still coming over though
You: fine.
Spare Key Stealer: I'm already here though.
You: fine.
Spare Key Stealer: I'm outside your bedroom door. let me in before your parents see me and try to pepper spray me
You: fine.
Spare Key Stealer: AND STOP SAYING "FINE."
You: *clears throat*
You: no.
Spare Key Stealer: just let make innnnn
You: u stole my spare key
Spare Key Stealer: make like elsa and let it fucking goooooo
You: ughhhh
You: now you're here. are you happy now?
Spare Key Stealer: very.
You: wait... you brought roses and oreos?
Spare Key Stealer: yes, it's to say I'm sorry. I also brought my cuddles
You: aww mikey
You: I love youuuu
Spare Key Stealer: I love you moreeeee
Spare Key Stealer: that's why I'm here.
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IVE BEEN FEELING REALLY SAD THIS PAST WEEK SO I DIDNT UPDATE. IM SO SORRY. GAH I HATE MYSELF
QOTC: what are you going to be for Halloween? (if you celebrate it)
my answer: a fallen angel. I'm spray painting my hair silver too ;)
love you to the moon and back xx
(p.s. Selena Gomez's new album is amazing.)
