Haikyuu!! x Reader

Sawamura Daichi || Understand

Daichi was requested by geekiemire -- I hope you enjoy it! ^.^

(P.S. I used gender neutral pronouns bc I've been meaning to, and I have read this over but if I missed any gendered pronouns, please point them out and I will fix them ^.^)

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 There were a lot of bad things about anxiety - not being able to talk to people correctly, not being able to go out with the few friends one had because of unnecessary fears, not able to make decisions in fear of being wrong, overthinking every little thing because something could go wrong at any minute, but this, this had to be the worst - nobody ever understood.

When (f/n) was feeling too anxious to leave the house, feeling too anxious to even simply message a friend or talk to their parents, nobody understood. It was always 'Come on, being afraid isn't an excuse.' and 'where are your guts? There's nothing scary about going to a restaurant.' and 'You'll be less nervous once you're really out there!' And, when (f/n) tried to correct these people, tried to help make the not anxiety ridden people of the world understand, they couldn't - they always turned into a stuttering mess, because there was no way to explain anxiety to somebody that didn't have it.

"It's not nerves," (f/n) wanted to say, because it's more than that, so much more than that. Stepping into any busy area at all on bad days caused (f/n)'s heart beat to pick up, caused their palms to sweat even more than they usually did, caused their stomach to tie in knots so big they constantly felt like they were going to be ill. It wasn't nerves - it was something branching off of nerves, something that (f/n) felt all the time, whether something 'important' or 'exciting' was going to happen soon or not. It was a constant feeling, one that (f/n) knew too well, one that they had felt forever, and one that they would probably feel for the rest of their lives.

People tried to understand, though - (f/n)'s parents tried their hardeest to understand their child, and when their child said that they weren't feeling comfortable enough for a huge family get together or a trip to somewere rather busy, they didn't push them; they instead left their child alone to cope, or even offered any help that they could give. They were good parents, but nobody could ever fully understand - sometimes they would slip and tell their child to get a grip, to toughen up.

A few of (f/n)'s friends tried too - a couple of them they'd known since they was younger, and three that they'd met when they first started high school. Only one of them really understood, because he too suffered through the terrible reality that was anxiety - he experienced the struggle as (f/n) did.

For some reasons, that's why Asahi was (f/n)'s best friend. They didn't feel obligated to message each other everyday, had each other to run to when everybody else was together, having fun alone, in their own respective places in one of their homes - they would get together when everyone else would, hide away in one of their rooms until they felt safe enough to come out.

Suga always tried his hardest to understand too, but his personality made it hard. He was always so open about things, ready to talk to anyone, get into anything for the hell of it - his personality was the exact opposite of (f/n)'s, the exact opposite of Asahi's. Sometimes he felt inferior, nervous, but never anxious - it made it hard for Suga to understand at all.

And Daichi, Daichi was almost exactly in the middle of the spectrum - not anxiety ridden but definitely more prone to feeling nervous/anxious than Suga - and by far the best person at trying, if (f/n) had to choose. He spent time studying (f/n), learning what they'll do when they're too nervous or starting to feel too uncomfortable, and after he knew the small signs he started figuring out ways to help (f/n) - getting them away from large crowds, taking over situations, intense or not, talking to them about nonsense in order to help them calm down. All the small things Daichi did helped (f/n) cope a little better, gave them somebody else they could rely on.