The Experiment © [Completed]

Chapter 18 - Yield

"Why do I have a feeling that I need to know more about Christine?" Dei said as she sat beside him by the bonfire.

Ken and Beth had already left and headed back to the villas to give them some time to talk, and Dei saw Beth mouth the word "sorry" to RJ before leaving.

"You don't. There's nothing to know," RJ said quietly as he drew circles on the sand with a stick.

Dei fell silent and RJ sighed.

"She belongs in my past, Dei. It's been three years and I really don't want any memories of her to be part of my present nor my future anymore, especially my future. So please, Dei, just let it go," he told her.

"It's hard... that I feel too insecure about her when I don't even know her," Dei said.

"There's no need to be insecure, Dei. She's nothing compared to you." he said, grabbing her hand. "Please... Don't let her ruin what we have. She's not worth it."

"What happened?" she insisted.

"God, Dei, would you let it go? It's really none of your freaking business!" he said, standing up and kicking the stick he was holding into the fire. "God!"

Dei stood up and left without a word.

"Dei!" he called out but she continued walking. "Dammit, Beth, you and freaking big mouth!" he muttered angrily. He sat back on the wood and allowed himself to simmer down.

+++++

"Dei?" Beth slowly sat up on the bed as Dei entered, crying. She looked meaningfully at Ken and he quickly left to find RJ.

Dei walked over to her bed and plopped on the edge with her hands on her face.

"Dei..." Beth called again as she approached her.

"He was so mad at me. It's the first time I've seen him that mad," Dei said, choking on her sob.

"Christine is still a touchy subject for him, apparently, and I shouldn't have mentioned her name. Especially in front of you. I'm sorry," Beth said, rubbing Dei's back.

"But why?" Dei cried.

"I'm afraid it's something for him to tell... in his own time." Beth said. "I've already said too much and I know he's going to hate me for it. I didn't mean to ruin your evening but please don't let this ruin what you guys have too."

"But how can it not when he won't even open up to me?" Dei whined.

"Well, maybe in time he would tell you. He's just not ready yet. RJ... he has a problem discussing feelings, especially strong ones. He's not comfortable opening up himself like that," Beth said. "And to be honest, Dei, I don't even think this issue with Christine is still relevant. He obviously cares so much about you."

Dei gulped her sobs and lay on her side on the bed.

"Beth..." Dei heard Ken's voice after several minutes and she felt Beth leave the bed. A few moments later, she felt the edge of the bed dip under someone's weight again, and she knew at once that it was RJ.

"Dei..." he called. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to shout at you back there."

She felt him lie beside her carefully and stayed a few feet away, not touching her.

"I've never seen you that mad before," Dei said quietly.

"I know, and I'm sorry." RJ said and he finally touched her on the shoulder. "I was just so frustrated. I really don't wanna talk about her."

"Why?"

"Because she's not worth it. She's not worth our time and energy. She's not even worth this little fight we're having." he told her. "Dei, look at me, please." he said, pulling her shoulder gently.

She turned to face him and he sighed as he wiped the tears on her cheek with his thumb.

"Please don't cry... She's nothing, and you're my everything. Let's not fight about her please," he told her gently.

She sighed and nodded. "Okay."

They didn't talk for another few minutes and just laid there silently. Dei spent the minutes tracing the patterns on the duvet while RJ watched her, trying to gauge her mood.

"Are you still mad?" he finally asked.

Dei shook her head. "You?"

"I can never stay mad at you, Dei."

She smiled a little. "I'm sorry..."

"No need to be," he said. He stared at her face and touched her cheek again. "I really want to kiss you right now, you know that," he whispered.

"And I really want to kiss you too," she replied, blushing.

RJ bit his lip to suppress a smile and leaned in to kiss her. Their kiss started slow at first, both of them savoring the taste of each other's lips. His hands were on her face and she had moved one of hers towards his nape.

In a swift moment, he became aware of where they were and how their lips were connected just like how he had been dreaming it. He kissed her deeper and felt her kissing him back in haste. He rolled on top of her and then propped his elbow on the mattress as he deepened the kiss some more. His tongue begged for access and she gave it after much prodding.

He moved his hand from her nape to her shoulders and down her arm, which he placed around his neck. Then he moved his hand up the inside of her blouse, but stopped almost instantly when he felt her go rigid as his hand touched the skin just below her bra.

He pulled away and saw the uncertainty in her eyes. He sighed and leaned his forehead against hers. "God, Dei, I don't know how much longer I can control this."

"I'm not ready," she whispered.

"I know. I'm sorry." he said and kissed her quickly on the lips. In an instant he was gone from her side and was out of the bed.

"Are you leaving?" she asked.

"I need to or I might not be able to stop myself anymore," he said, his breathing uneven. "And I need to take care of business," he added with a half smile.

"I'm sorry," she said, smiling back.

"I'll ask Beth to come back here. Goodnight." he said and kissed her ever so lightly on the lips.

"Good night." she said, watching him as he left.