flower; ch

* "i want you to show me."

"i love lying next to you,
i could do this for eternity...
...god knew exactly what he was
doing, when he led me to you"
{adore you, miley cyrus)

a/n sorry for all the calum pov's, idk why i love writing from his so much. pov changes to indigo's mid chapter. ***there's also smut in this chapter (hence the asterisk) and it's very detailed sooooo read w caution i guess :) x

calum

the ride home is quiet, filled with only the faint hum of indigo's playlist is playing softly in the background. i don't even say a word when i hear a familiar tune, specifically one of my songs, play through the speakers. my hand is placed gingerly on indigo's thigh, because i don't know how else to comfort her. once she parks in the driveway, i jump out of the car quickly, before literally sprinting to the driver's door. opening it, i'm met with a very amused indigo staring down at me.

"m'lady," i say chivalrously, gesturing my hand out to her in a mock gentleman way. she bites her lips to suppress a grin, before taking my hand and sliding off the seat. i refrain from releasing her hand, shutting the door behind us.

we walk into the kitchen, indigo dropping my hand before opening the fridge and grabbing two water bottles. i graciously except the drink, watching her closely as she leans her back against the counter and takes a swig from it. it's then that i realize, we really need to talk about us before i leave tomorrow, and whether or not she's coming with me.

"we should talk, yeah?" i offer quietly, seeing her eyes dart to me with a nervous look. she nods despite whatever is going through her head. i move to lean against the counter across from her. i wasn't sure if she wanted me to talk first, but before i can begin, she speaks.

"if this relationship is going to work, you have to talk to me. you can't just make choices because of what you think is the best decision, especially when my feelings are involved." i nod solemnly at her words, not wanting to speak until she's finished. "i care about my job a lot, but that doesn't mean i would ever want to lose you over it. i can build a career on my own, and i don't want you to think that you will effect it or be my downfall, ya know? i just... i guess what i'm trying to say is that i believe in myself, and i believe in us together, but for us to work you can't make my decisions for me. and i know that wasn't your intention, because you aren't like that, but it's how it ended up happening."

i stare at her for a few seconds, lips parted. it's taking me a moment to process everything she has said. each word and each point, is so accurate and so well said, and sometimes i forget how smart and how rational indigo really is. she can be a risk taker, but she's never irrational. her mind is constantly moving a hundred miles a minute, and she thinks before she speaks, always. it's endearing to me, as someone who has grown into a similar mindset, but i'm nowhere as in depth at it as the girl in front of me is.

"i went about everything in... the worst way. as soon as i got it in my mind that you would be effected, i created a sort of... hero complex. i thought that in getting you away from me, it would benefit you or something. i guess it was the egotistical side of me, a side of me that thinks i need to protect you, even when you're clearly capable of taking care of yourself. i... i wish i could go back and change it, but i can't," i talk slowly, trying to say everything exactly how i want it to be said, and study her face the entire time.

as i speak, her features relax slightly, her eyebrows aren't pulled together, her lips are in their natural spot, and her hands have stopped fidgeting like they had when she was talking to me.