Always

Chapter 50

Yes, I was hurt. My chest actually felt sore from the pain...but it would feel worse if I let him go. If Colby weren't in my life, I wouldn't be able to breathe. I let out a heavy breath, and put my hands back in his hair, drawing his head back down to my lap.  His grip tightened on me again, pulling himself closer to me. "I wish you would have told me before I came here. Before she made me look like a damn fool." I said, voice finally full of emotion, cracking as I spoke. He leaned away from me, standing, but pulling me with him. One hand on my hip, while the other comes up under my chin, forcing me to look into those intense blue eyes that I love so much. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know that she would be here. She's been overseas for the past few years." He shook his head roughly, and removed his hand from my face to drag it through his hair. "That's not a reason. That's an excuse. I was just scared at first, then I put it out of my mind. I haven't thought about it anymore. I'm sorry I hurt you. You know I would never intentionally do that." His gaze is burning into my soul now, making the pain lessen a little. Maybe I was being stupid or petty. I know he loves me but I somehow fell like Tessa got a part of him that I didn't and it eats me up inside. I placed my hands on his bare chest, and traced the tattoo across his peck with my index finger, staring down at it. Both of his arms go around me now, pulling me close, as he buries his head in my neck, like he's trying to hide in my hair. I have to force my arms up because they are trapped in between our bodies, but I manage to slide them around his neck, up into his hair agains. We stood like that for a few minutes, not saying anything, just enjoying the comfort that we could give one another. His hands starting moving, trailing up and down my back, sending shivers down my spine. There was something gnawing at my subconscious though. The phone call. He had been telling her no about something, that I wasn't like the rest of the girls. I pushed back a little, and he raised his head, his eyes still worried, and now questioning as well. "What did Tessa want on the phone Colby? Did she call you or did you call her?" I asked, my voice stern because I knew the answer. His cheeks started to flush again. "She called me." He said in a quiet voice. "What did she want?" I asked again, already knowing but I needed him to tell me. His shoulders slumped, but he didn't remove his arms from around me. "She wanted to hook up." I felt my blood start boiling as soon as the words left his mouth. He must have seen it in my eyes because his arms tightened around me again, like he was worried that I would try to break away from him. "I told her no baby! I told her not to ask me again!" I let out a short laugh, my voice sounding kind of insane from my anger. I was going to kill her...maybe not, but I was going to smash her f*cking head into a wall and dare her to even speak to him again. "She had no business asking you that Colby." My voice was level, but even I didn't  recognize the acid that was dripping along with it. "I know she didn't. She just thought that I would because I've been with other girls when I've seen her and it didn't make a difference." I was stunned. He was a cheater? My Colby? The sweetest many that I had ever met in my life, the one who brings me soup when I'm sick, and wipes my face with a cold rag. The man that will turn his head when we watch a rated R movie and a naked chick comes on the screen. I don't think that my brain can accept this and I recoil from him. "What?" I asked, in total shock. He scrambles to correct himself. "What I mean is I would be with someone but it wasn't serious..." I shook my head to stop him from talking. "First, I can't believe that you are taking up for her extremely disgusting behavior. Second, did you just magically transform into a different person when I met you, or are you hiding even more shit from me that I need to know before we pledge our lives to each other?" My words weren't that harsh, but tone was. "You were a whore who didn't care about these other girls feelings?" My voice was raising and getting more high pitched. I knew his parents would be able to hear us soon, if I didn't calm down. Jesus, I felt like a child again, having to hide things. His eyes flashed when I said the last line, anger coming into them. "I wasn't a whore!" Again with the hand messing up the hair. "Okay, maybe I was...but I did care about other's feelings! I told everyone one of them that I wasn't in it for a relationship and that we were just having fun. You should know me better than that." I closed my eyes and chewed on my lip, calming myself. Okay, that made me feel better. Maybe I should try to talk this out instead of jumping to conclusions but this has just been one big shit storm of a day. Opening my eyes again, I met his gaze. "Fine." I replied. "I'm sorry that I said that. I do you know you better than that, or at least I hope that I do." His eyes softened and he closed the distance between us again. "Are we okay?" He asked softly, bringing me close against his bare chest again. I laid my head on it, hearing his heartbeat in my ear, and feeling his warm skin against my cheek. He lazily stroked my hair down my back, giving me comfort again. "Yeah." I sighed out. "Always, Love." He whispered into my ear. "Always," I replied back..."But I'm gonna f*ck her up." I said this last part really quietly but he heard me. He sighed heavily.