HeartBREAK

Chapter fifty

 It was Tuesday night- Maureen just got back from pole practice, but her day was far from done. She has booked training room two for the entire night to herself. Even though they didn't have classes at the moment, she still was working on some dances. It weren't normal dances though, those ones were special. She didn't need them for an assignment or a show, she needed them for an application. It has been a hard decision to make but the project week really opened her heart to all her other options apart from NYABM. For the first time since year two she felt like she could be equally good as everyone else in the room when she was pole dancing. She wasn't a bad dancer, she has always known that but getting out of her comfort zone made her realize how good she actually was. She was a great dancer but just didn't fit in at NYABM. She didn't even want to fit in anymore- not after seeing what it would cost her. To her, the environment was toxic. Ballet was toxic. And knowing she might not graduate from NYABM broke her heart- but in a strengthening way. She knew how many possibilities and ways to go were out there just waiting for her to discover them- she just had to have the courage to get on her feet and start marching towards them. In the beginning, she has been worried about whether she was going to pass this year or not- she didn't even want to pass. In fact, she has made up her mind. After going back and forth dozens of times Maureen has finally made a decision- she was going to drop out of NYABM. And the main reason why it has been so hard for her to come to that conclusion was that she had no idea what she wanted to do next. NYABM has been her dream, her ultimate life goal. And she got there, she accomplished her goal and she had a blast- while it was good. But with every minute she was a part of this system she felt more and more unhappy, like she was never good enough. But leaving NYABM and her professional career in dance behind didn't mean she wanted to turn her back on dance completely. She has made some research and found a job she thought would be such a fit. But in order to get the job, she needed a phenomenal application- and that application included dance videos- all kinds of them. Solos in different styles, duets, partnering, really anything that she possibly could bring to the table. But first of all she needed a video of herself explaining why she wanted to get the job- that was why she set up a camera, opened her script and looked right into the lens. "Confidence is the key to happiness and in order to be happy about your life you need to be confident in yourself." 

Raphaels phone bleeped. It was a message from Maureen. "Can you come to studio two? I wanna work with you on something." Raphael sighed- he has just showered. But, if Maureen asked it meant it mattered to her, which also meant it mattered to him. Without bothering to reply he put on some sweats and a tank top and made his way down the stairs. It was pretty dark and silent on the hallways, not a single soul was wandering them. All the lights were switched off- apart from one. The one in training room two. Through the door he dimly heard "Changing" by Sigma ft. Paloma Faith and Maureens heavy breathing. He smiled- he just caught Maureen dancing around her room to this song a couple of days ago. She looked to happy then. Carefully, trying not to interrupt her he stepped into the room- and his jaw dropped. She was actually setting the room on fire with this incredible jazz choreography. It was only after she was finished he noticed the camera recording her. "Wow, that was so good!", he gasped in astonishment- he had no idea Maureen was such a good Jazz dancer! "Thanks!", she said and gave him a little kiss. "Thanks for showing up.", she said. "Of course.", Raphael said, "Watching this was totally worth it." "Well, you aren't done yet. Are you warmed up?", she asked. Raphael frowned:" Kind of? Why?" "Because I prepared a little partnering duo for the two of us which we are going to rehearse and record today.", Maureen proclaimed and pulled him deeper into the room. "Maureen, it's late, I'm exhausted...", Raphael sighed but he didn't stand a chance. "I have to do it today.", Maureen said and tightened her pony. "Why the rush?", Raphael asked but she just acted as if she didn't hear and turned up the music. It was "We don't have to take our clothes off" by Ella Eyre- a really beautiful song, especially for a romantic lyrical duo. "Okay, we are going to start on the floor.", Maureen commanded and they started working. The whole dance was about exposing yourself to each other, something Raphael felt like Maureen had a personal relationship to. Half an hour later the routine was down and Raphael took a little break to get some water. It was definitely a beautiful choreography but it was also very emotional which meant it included a lot of jumps and lifts. That usually was not a problem for Raphael but he felt how he was running out of energy- it was already close to midnight. "Can't we record it tomorrow?", Raphael asked. "Come on, we have almost got it- what's wrong?", Maureen asked. Raphael was actually shocked- how was she still that filled with energy? She seemed to really care about the project- whatever it was for. "I just feel like I could put a lot more of emotion in there if I wasn't so tired- it's so beautiful and it would be a shame to ruin it by giving a 50% performance." By surprise Maureen agreed- she finally must have reached her limits as well. "Fine. But tomorrow we are recording it. Promise?" "Promise."

Hello beautiful people! Well well well, this is what I call some change! What do you guys think Maureen wants to do next and what is that job she is trying to get? Let me know and have a great day! I love you a lot,                                                                                                                 XOXO, AllyMaii