Davina: Who ate all the cookies?
Salma: Ninjas.
Davina: I didn't see them.
Salma: No one ever does.
***
*Kadir visiting Taeka and watching her play video games*
Kadir: Hey, Taeka.
Taeka: What?
Kadir: Can I share something with you from earlier today?
Taeka: What is it, Kadir?
Kadir: Well, I sent you a text...
Taeka: Mm-hm.
Kadir: ...early in the morning.
Taeka: Yeah.
Kadir: Because I have to go out of town for one weekend...
Taeka: Yeah.
Kadir: ...this month.
Taeka: Uh-huh.
Kadir: And so, I was like...I won't give specific dates, but I was like, 'Do you have any preference whether I go, uh, this weekend or the next weekend'?
Taeka: Mm-hm.
Kadir: Your response...
*Taeka starts laughing*
Kadir: ...at 9:30 in the morning...
*Taeka continues laughing*
Kadir: 'Motherfucking Jesse Ibisberg Arceus fuck dude motherfucking Facebook movie bullshit Arceus can you fucking believe this shit?'
*Taeka continues laughing even louder*
Kadir: N-no... no punctuation.
Taeka: *still laughing* You just made me die- oh.
Kadir: Random capitalization. So I responded 'I have no idea what we're talking about right now'.
*Taeka giggles*
Kadir: Forty-five minutes pass.
*Taeka's laughter resumes*
Kadir: I get a text from you: 'Arceus damn created Facebook and fucking lawyers and shit right fucking Eaglevoss twins Arceus damn rowing the boat fuck yo shit I can't even fucking believe this shit have you seen this shit fuck I just watched this shit fuck Jesse Ibisberg man'.
*Taeka continues laughing*
Kadir: I respond, 'Taeka, you're scaring me'. An hour passes. You respond, 'Motherfucking Spinirak-Man. Spinirak-Man you put in the time fuck put in the time motherfucking build shit with his bare hands fucking best friend shit Jesse Ibisber...I'm very tired.'
*Taeka laughs hard*
Kadir: I'm just like, 'No problem, Taeka. I'll-I'll do most of the talking at the meeting today'. Immediate, like, response, I'm talking like five seconds later: 'No man I'll just talk about the Facebook movie all day shit man you have to be so interested in the shit I have to say about the Facebook movie fuck dude I just watched it a year and a half ago fuck Jesse Ibisberg man he fucked over Spinirak-Man crazy Eaglevoss twins rowing Trent raven or did the soundtrack fuck this guy who invented Facebook I don't like dying I can't think of who the fuck invented Facebook all I can think is the guy who played the guy who invented Facebook who the fuck invented Facebook?' And then, in all capital letters, two hours later: 'MARK ZUCKERBURG!'
*Taeka dies of laughter*
***
Carnol: *doing a crossword* Do you know a 7 letter word for red?
Xenala: Dark red.
