I Am Your Teacher (Severus Snape X Reader)

I'll Try (Fred)

It has only been one week since that night in Hogsmeade. I'm not sure why I thought this would be easy. Even though I had ended anything that Fred and I might have had, it still didn't feel like it was over. I can't stop thinking about him. He's in my thoughts all the time. I have to concentrate to keep the thought of him from entering my mind. I find myself daydreaming about talking to him.

I'll feel myself begin to smile and realize my thoughts drifted to him again. Then a hollow ache fills my chest and I feel uncomfortable sitting in my skin. Everyone already knew about what happened between Fred and me last week. Lucky for me, most of them seemed too uncomfortable to ask me about it.

Well, except Hermione of course... who dragged Ron along with her. They didn't get much out of me when they asked about what happened. I told them the truth. That I simply ended things between us before it got out of hand. Of course, she showed concern about how I was feeling. She pestered me with questions for about 10 minutes trying to dissect my thoughts before she eventually gave up.

Ron was abnormally quiet the entire time, which for some reason unsettled me. He was the only one I had opened up to about how I was feeling... Now I wish I would have kept it to myself. I guess you learn from your mistakes... which is why I am keeping everything to myself now. I don't dare tell them that I'm afraid. Afraid that what happened with Severus would repeat itself with Fredrick. That I am scared of losing Fred completely. I'm not ready to go through that kind of pain again. I know if I told anyone the truth of how I feel they would say I am crazy. Try talking me out of my decision, and I can't let that happen. I've made my choice. Though, from the glances I have been receiving from Ron, I could tell he was skeptical about my actions.

I've decided to skip class today. There was no point in going. Well, there was.  But my grades have been perfect and I have been trying my hardest to keep everyone happy. I haven't had any time to myself and have been neglecting my own needs... So in a way... It feels as though I deserve to ditch.

I've done nothing but kept myself busy so I wouldn't have to deal with my emotions. Honestly, I think it's time I do just that. Though, I'm gonna have to be completely alone. There is no way I want to ugly cry in front of everyone. Before I left, I enchanted some paper and directed it to Draco. Leaving a small note to let him know where I was going. I know he won't come looking for me and just in case something happens to me, one person should at least know where I was.

It wasn't cold out. The air had a nice crisp breeze that tickled my nose as I took in breaths. I walked to that spot on the hill where Severus and I danced the night of the ball. I didn't come here to remind myself of another painful memory. I came here because it was peaceful. I took off the satchel I had draped around my once shoulder before I left.

I opened, pulling out Fred's red sweater, the one I stole from his bedroom.  I slipped it over my head as I sat on the grass, staring at the whomping willow from a distance. Beautiful, fluffy white clouds decorated the sky behind it. I sat here, silently taking in all my surroundings one breath at a time. I snuggled into the red fabric that hung loosely around my frame. Fantasizing about what could have been if I wasn't so scared.