Chapter Nineteen.

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“Are you sure about this?” Michael asked me and mum as he closed the boot of the car up after putting the last suitcase in it. At first we were unsure that it would actually shut due to the amount of stuff crammed into it, but luckily it did.

I looked at mum. “Yes,” mum smiled to Michael. “We could all do with some family time.”

“My girls,” Michael said, giving us both a hug. “Jack, get out the flower bed.”

Turning around, I saw Jack grinning a huge cheeky grin up at me. “Come here trouble,” I laughed, picking him up so he’d stop playing in the flowers and prevent him from trampling on the snowdrops. “Let’s go home.”

“Is George gonna be there?” he grinned.

Looking at his smile, I shook my head. “Me and George aren’t together anymore,” I said, faking a smile.

“Why?”

“It’s grown up stuff,” I smiled. “I tell you what. You can look after Lily in the car if you promise to be good.”

“Please,” he grinned, grabbing hold of the strings on my hoodie as he began to play with them.

“Come on then,” I laughed, opening the car door and putting him in his seat as mum leant over from the front of fasten him into his car seat.

Turning back to look at the house, I smiled. This was what I needed but it hurt to think of all the memories I’d had in the house, especially the memories I had here with George. Taking one final look at the house, I got into the car and smiled at mum and Michael as they both looked at me.

“Ready?”

“Ready.”

*

“I won’t be long,” I smiled, shutting the car door behind me before I ran into the apartment building.

I hadn’t been back in a week but everything felt different and strange. In fact it felt like I hadn’t been back for more than a week; it felt like I was going back after not being there for years. As I reached the top floor, I grabbed my key from my pocket and twisted it in the lock, unlocking the door.

“Oh, I thought you were gonna be out,” I said as I walked in to see George sat on the sofa watching television.

Getting up from the sofa, he gave me the coldest look ever as he walked into the kitchen to ignore my presence in the apartment we once shared. I didn’t expect a welcome back party but I wasn’t expecting this either. I can understand him for being hurt but not hating me; after all, I was doing this for his own good.

Walking into the bedroom, I got my suitcase that was dumped on the floor besides the side of the bed I used to sleep and put it on the bed. I opened the wardrobe and grabbed a handful of the clothes. Plonking them in the suitcase, I noticed that the photo frame with the photo of me and George in the Bahamas at Kate’s wedding last year in it was missing from my bedside table. As I put another set of clothes into the suitcase, I noticed that the photo frame with the photo of me and George at Josh’s 21st birthday party was also missing from the dressing table. Looking around the room, I realised all the photo frames had been taken down. I couldn’t be bothered to argue with George so I let it go and decided not to ask him where they’d gone.

“Have you got everything?” George asked, stood leaning against the wall in the hallway as I carried the suitcase out of the bedroom.

“Just a few more things but I’ll take this to the car then come back,” I said.

He looked at me as I went through the letters on the table beside the front door. “You don’t have to go, you know.”

“Don’t do this please,” I begged as I opened the front door.

Carrying the suitcase down the stairs, I tried to ignore George’s pleas for me to stay and to try work things out. As I got down to the car where Michael was waiting to put my suitcase in the already full boot, he noticed the tear in my eye and gave me a smile. “It’s going to be okay. I promised.”

“Do you mind if I take Jack to say bye as I know how much George meant to him?” I asked.

“Take as long as you want,” Michael smiled to me as he slammed the boot closed.

I opened the car door and reached in to unbuckle Jack. “Are you okay, honey?” mum asked, looking at me, looking worried.

“I’m fine,” I said with a reassuring smile. “Come on you, let’s go get Lily.”

*

“George!” Jack screeched as I opened the door back up to the apartment.

“He wanted to say bye,” I said, getting Lily from her bed, watching Jack run up to George.

“George,” Jack sighed as George picked him. “Why are you not coming with us?”

“Going where?” George asked, looking at me in confusion.

“I don’t know,” Jack giggled. “Sammy knows.”

I tried to avoid telling George we were moving back to York so tried to find something else to ask him to avoid the subject completely. “Have you seen Lily’s ball?”

“Where are you going?” George asked, completely ignoring my question just like I had just ignored his question.

I looked at him and then at Jack. “We’re moving back to York.”

“Why? You said yourself; London’s your home now,” George said, looking shocked.

“Jack,” I smiled, taking him off George and putting him onto the floor. “Go play with Lily if you want. She’s in the bedroom.”

As Jack toddled off into the bedroom, I turned back to George. “It was mum’s decision – not mine. She thinks I need a break from everything so I can focus on writing this second album,” I sighed.

“But York?” he asked. “That’s on the other side of the country. How are we supposed to sort this out if you’re hundreds of miles away?”

I looked down the hallway to see Jack poking his head around the bedroom door, trying to spy on me and George. “Go play with Lily please, Jack,” I said. With that, he ran back into the bedroom giggling. Looking back at George, he tried to take hold of my hand. “No.”

“I want us to sort this out,” he said.

“I need space though. We’ve just..” I realised I’d raised my voice so tried to quieten down so Jack wouldn’t overhear us. “We’ve just lost a baby. We both need time apart.”

“You’ll be back though,” he asked. “Won’t you?”

“I don’t know.” Turning back to the corridor, I called for Jack and he came running down the hallway with his unsteady toddler run, chasing poor Lily who looked in fear of her life. “Jack,” I smiled. “Say bye to George.”

George looked at me, shaking his head. “Don’t do this,” he said.

“Bye George,” Jack grinned, waving up at him as he clung onto my leg.

“It’s for the best,” I said, trying to hide my emotions that were ready to burst out of me. “I love you. I really do love you, but one day, you’ll look back and realise this was the best thing to do.”

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