Pitch Perfect One-Shots

Chapter CLXXX - Bechloe: Three Sheets To The Wind

Idea by navratilova776

It started out as one drink. Just one. That was all. It was so innocent. Nothing to it. It was just one drink to take the edge off. The week had been a long one. Soda wasn't going to cut it. Just one drink. Or maybe two? Two should have been enough. More than enough. The week was REALLY tough. One drink was warm and fuzzy but two really had that buzz... until it didn't anymore. Three. That was it. She was in control. Three was her maximum. She knew when to stop. She knew her tolerance better than anyone. She knew what she could and couldn't have. She knew when she could and couldn't have it. The week was long. But that's what she said last week... and the week before that... and the week before that... Soon enough, she was repeating the mantra every day for the next year. Three turned into four. Four turned into five. Eventually, numbers ceased to exist and all control was lost.

It wasn't the week. It wasn't the work. It was life. It was the past. Why did she turn to such a crippling vice to cope with things that were out of her control? Fear of not having control when she was younger to the total need for control when she was older, only to lose it again to her own hand by the demon drink. How ironic. To drink, to forget, to be numb, it didn't matter the following morning. Only regret played on her mind when she woke from the cycle of the night before. Why did she do it? The same reason anybody did it. To forget. To fill the hole in their hearts. They denied it, of course. Just as she did. According to her, she didn't have a hole in her heart. She just wanted something to take the edge off. The edge off what? The day? The week? The reality? Only deep down in her heart of hearts could she reveal the true answer.

It wasn't until she came home one day to find her loved ones awaiting her in her living room, her wife closest to her in tears. She feared that something had happened - her father died? One of her sisters? No. They were there for her. Only her. Her sisters were all accounted for and they all had something to say. Some of them were harsh, some of them were kind, some of them were in between. They all made valid points but she didn't take them on board. However, the thing that struck her the most was her wife's silence and her tears. She didn't think her other half was going to speak and when she did, it was barely audible but loud enough for her.

"I don't know what to do..."

It was enough. It was enough to shake her to her core. The heartbreak on her wife's face and in her voice was more than enough. She didn't know what to do either. She was a mess. What had she done? This wasn't what her life was supposed to turn out like. She was better than that but she had merely lost sight of it. Why? She didn't particularly know. The truth was buried in the pit of her stomach, down, dark, deep, and awaiting to be exhumed. It was going to be a painful process but the pain she caused others... her wife... she had no right to complain. For the first time, support was something she needed the most. Her sisters helped her the best they could but nothing compared to the support, the LOVE, she was gifted from her wife.

Love - she didn't truly understand the meaning of the word until now. Heretofore, it was just an exaggeration of obsession and indulgence but now, it was something entirely different. It was kindness, hope, courage, patience, and understanding all bundled into one glorious entity labeled as love. She understood it and she needed it. She needed it all along. She needed it to repair the holes in her heart. She needed it to move on. She needed it for the road ahead but most of all, she needed to share it with someone and for the first time, she was able to do that with her wife.

Going cold turkey wasn't the wisest option but that was okay. That was when control came back into play. Soon enough, four drinks turned into three, three into two, two into one, then one into none. Why? Because she realised that there was no need for it anymore. The week hadn't been rough. The work hadn't been too much. It was the past but it was buried under the guise of everyday living. It all took its toll on her mind. She didn't need her buzz anymore. She was quick to realise that she had it all along. Her wife - radiant with red hair, blue eyes, and a smile that could light up the world on its darkest night - gave her everything she needed. No more buzz. No more demons. No more addictions. Just contentment and love because, at the end of the day, that's all she needed and ever would need until her end of days.