Yours Truly

88: You are loved

Mr. Kim felt his heart grow heavier with days. His little boy was growing up. His little Taehyung has now started earning for the sake of supporting his love. He has started managing funds. He has grown up overnight.
Mr. Kim knows, growing up comes with many hurdles of it's own. But he truely believes the universe is going more harsh on Taehyung. He has lost so much.
Taehyung looked sharper. More and more mature. He toyed with a paperweight. Mr. Kim huffed,
"Taehyung-ah, please. Just let me help you, my son."
He smiled, pouting his lips, he nodded his head in a no,
"Nope Appa. I cannot be asking for help all my life. I am a grown up now. I am earning now. How's everyone back home?"
He gulped, fixing his glasses. Taehyung could tell that his father didn't want to meet his eyes. Well, he neither. He had lost the dreaminess that he once held in his eyes. Perhaps if he went back to the burial home he would've found it. But how do you go there, without a body to bury? Won't it be rude?
His ears started ringing. Intrusive thoughts all around his head. Smoke, fire, roof, cars, pills, rope, knives. He started feeling fuzzy and suffocated. As if someone had pushed a cactus down his throat. He wanted to scream but that would hurt more. He felt as if scorpions stung his veins and crows pecked his organs. He swore he felt the taste of his own blood at the back of his mouth.
"Taehyung-ah?"
He gasped, as if someone pulled him up from underwater. Eyes widened and tears at the very corner. He raspily answered,
"Pardon?"
Mr. Kim usually gets rather pissed when people don't listen to him and instead become distracted. But not this time. Instead, he was worried sick this time. How pale Taehyung had gone in matter of a few moments. How startled he looked. How disturbed he was. He nodded,
"Taehyung-ah, you can't go on taking up more. You have gone through a lot. Seo-jun, your little sister and now your friends. You are devasted, which is completely normal to be. Please Taehyung-ah, it's not about responsibility this time, it's about your own good."
"Appa, I can't. You know, Sierra, my Juliette? She has been earning for herself since she was 15. And she wanted to go on. I was the one that assured her that she doesn't need to. That I will support us both. Now I cannot just ask my father to pay fir us both. That would hurt my pride. But, tempting offer, Appa."

Jungkook was always a perfectionist. The way he diced the onions. Just the way the recipe book said. His mother smiled, patting his head. How pale he had turned and how much weight he had lost. His eyes looked empty. She got a bit of the warm soup on the ladle, holding it in front of him, gently nudging him,
"Taste it, my dear."
He smacked his lips the spice hitting the right spots. His brows scrunched, as if he would lash out any moment,
"Perfect, Eomma."
He tried smiling. But nothing can fool a mother. His mother placed the ladle away, gently patting her son's head,
"Jungkook-ah, you know your late grandfather named you " the pillar's of the nation". You are meant for greater things, my son. Please don't give up this easy. I know, it is growing harder each passing day. No one your age goes through all this. It's quite admirable that you, and your friends are holding out. Just hold oit a bit more. These harsh times too shall pass. Know that you are loved. By your mother, by your father, by your Hyung and your friends. Chaeyoung, Jimin, Namjoon, Jisoo. All of them are wishing the best for you from the heavens. You are loved, Jeon Jungkook. You are loved."

Lisa toyed with a soft toy on her soft bed. Dark eyebags under her eyes and no beauty regime wasn't helping her. She had lost her appetite. Her ribs felt heavy, her tears poured out like rain. She felt torn apart. Into tiny, tiny, tiny pieces. She was doomed. She doomed herself.
She felt a thaw in her heart. A growing pain. What was it that her heart wanted? Jeong Yoon-o? He was all that she ever needed. But he noticed no change, nor did he change. Which was all that she ever wished for. Then what was it that disappointed her? Why, after all she has done to Jungkook, was she wanting him again? As if all her problems would disappeared if he again loved her like the old times. Why? For no apparent reason. She wasn't her best self with him, but was with Yoon-o. Still, she wanted the old times back. Perhaps because back then, she was truly happy. She wasn't worried about being stripped away from her true self. She wasn't anxious whenever her phone rang. Thinking, whether it was another death news.
A small knock on her door,
"Pranpriya?"
Lisa rubbed her tears away, pulling up a smile,
"Yeah Auntie?"
"May I come in, Lalisa?"
She jumped to her feet, hugging her aunt tightly,
"You don't need to ask, Auntie. You never need to ask."
Her aunt pecked her cheeks, patting her hair,
"Lalisa, you don't need to hide your tears from me. Or anyone. I know, life for you has been hard. But rainbows only shine after a huge storm. You are loved, Lalisa. You know how to love."
She sniffled, sarcasm dawning jn her doll eyes,
"Auntie, what is love?"
"Love's all that is to the world Lalisa."
She ruffled her hair. Lalisa lied her head on her aunt's lap. Sniffling, as the bitter pain inside her grew. She felt like throwing up. As if a bitter, gooey liquid was rising up her vocal cords. She felt as if her head would burst any moment. In a feeble voice, she sobbed,
"Why does it hurt so much then Auntie?"