lilies.

57

Kabanata 57

It's the same hotel we went to last time. Nauna akong pinapasok ni Rai sa kwarto. I didn't bring any change of clothes. Sobrang sakit na rin ng ulo ko para isipin pa iyon.

Nang matanaw ko ang kama ay agad kong tinakbo iyon at nagpatihulog na roon. Ginapang ko ang papunta sa unan at sinubsob ang mukha roon.

Lumubog din ang kama sa tabi.

"Ah, lambot!" Gab exclaimed. He's doing something I'm sure. Ang likot niya. Umuuga ang kama. Naramdaman kong umalis siya saglit. May malaking unan na humambalos sa likod ko. Sunod ay sa paa ko.

The walls. He's creating the walls we normally put whenever we have sleepovers. Umurong ako sa pinakadulo ng kama.

"Gab, we all have separate rooms!" I heard Rai tell him.

"Talaga? Bakit hindi mo sinabi agad? Na-ready ko na e. Dito na lang tayong tatlo!"

I dozed off. Hindi ko na alam kung anong naging resulta ng pagtatalo nilang dalawa.

I woke up with my head on someone's chest. I immediately know that it's Rai because of his familiar scent. It's not his body wash or perfume, it's equally mabango though, but he really has his own natural scent. I actually didn't believe it before that people have their natural scent, not until I experienced it with Rai.

Nakapatong sa unan ko ang kanang kamay niya at ang isa ay nakapatong sa baywang ko. I slightly look up to see him. He's changed into his sleepwear. Samantalang ako, suot ko pa rin ang suot ko kagabi. May binting nakapatong sa baywang ni Rai at nakapatong ang paa sa baywang ko.

I moved half of my body to check who. I sighed. It's Gab. Nakaparehong pantulog na rin sila. Nakakahiya naman. Hindi man lang ako nakapagpalit.

Memories of last night immediately flashed. Napapikit ako ng mariin. Shit. Mas nakakahiya iyon. I cried! May sinampal ako. God.

Rai slightly moved, "Are you awake, hmm?"

I didn't meet his eyes. Nahihiya ako.

"Sleep more, it's still early, I guess..."

Feeling ko nakatulog pa ulit siya dahil hindi na siya nagsalita ulit. I can't sleep again though. Now that I feel all the embarrassment I should've felt last night.

Humihilab na ang tyan ko. I need something hot to cure my hangover. Luckily, my head isn't throbbing. I wouldn't try to be drunk again. Okay na maging killjoy. I don't like to be not in control of myself again. Why would people want that? They said you're the most truthful version of yourself when you're drunk but what I felt last night was not my true self... It's like I'm letting my intrusive thoughts control me. There's no break or control, it's all or nothing.

"I'm hungry..." I muttered, sort of loud, knowing that both of them are sleeping.

I am watching Rai sleep the whole time, waiting, so I certainly know that he's past asleep.

It's like it is Rai's alarm clock. He immediately opened his eyes. Muntik pa akong matakot.

"Morning..." He whispered huskily. Pogi, "Happy Birthday."

"Morning and thank you..."

"I don't know if I'm dreaming or what but you said you're hungry?"

I grinned, "You were half asleep then. I did say that."

He hugged me tight. "Okay, I'll call for breakfast."

Nakayakap lang siya sa akin at pumikit ulit. He sniffed on my hair.

"Hmm..."

I bit my lip while smiling. Antok pa talaga siya.

"Are you already calling them in your dreams?" I teased. I didn't move, he hugged me tightly, "Do you want me to call them instead? So you can still sleep?"