I'll keep you safe

Chapter 118

The pain Steph felt in her heart was indescribable, so painful she could barely breathe. Maxine was gone, forever. That was it. She hadn't even had the chance to say goodbye, to hug her, or tell her how much she loved her one last time.

It wasn't fair, it wasn't right.

She wanted the floor to wrap itself around her body and pull her into the ground. How could she live without Maxine by her side? Maxine was her world, Steph adored her. She had brought joy back into her life. And now she was gone. Just like that. Her heart throbbed and screamed.

Tears streamed down her face as she held Maxine's cold, limp hand. She wanted it all to be a bad dream. She wanted to wake up and find Maxine sleeping peacefully in her bed. She wanted to turn back the clock- to have arrived at the house earlier than she had done, so she could save her. She wanted Maxine back. She wanted what she couldn't have.

It was the kind of thing you expected to see on the news. An innocent young woman- killed by her abusive husband or boyfriend. You'd see a statement from the grieving family, maybe the outcome of the Court Case, and a picture of the man who had taken the life of a promising, beautiful woman. You felt the grief of the family at surface level, as well as their heartbreak. What they were going through was unimaginable. Steph had never imagined that she would be in this position. Maxine was an innocent, beautiful and promising young woman, who had been murdered by her boyfriend. Steph was the grieving Mother. She felt the grief and heartbreak first hand. It was powerful enough to kill her. She wished it would, in a way.

Maxine didn't deserve this. She was a child, just a few weeks away from turning eighteen. She'd had her whole life ahead of her, a bright future in the palm of her hands. Her life had been taken before it had even begun. It wasn't fair. Why Maxine?

The anger Steph felt towards Earl Kelly threatened to eat her alive.

How could he do this?

He was scum.

He was evil.

She'd known he was trouble from the first day she'd met him.

From the second Steph had taken Maxine in, she had vowed to protect her. But she hadn't been able to protect her from Earl Kelly.

But, at the same time, that was a part of Maxine that she loved. Maxine always saw the best in people, no matter what. She'd even seen the best in Earl Kelly. Maxine loved deeply and passionately, Steph had always known that. Earl had taken advantage. And now she was gone, because of him. Steph despised him. She would never forgive him for this.

The 'What ifs' were racing through her mind on a loop, taunting her.

What if it had been her, instead of Maxine? She wished it had been. She wished she was the one with the bullet in her abdomen, instead of Maxine. She wished Earl had shot her instead. Then Maxine would still be alive, and she'd of had a chance at a future.

What if she had just stepped out of the classroom to talk to Maxine when she'd asked her to? She should have been there for Maxine, Inspector or no Inspector. She knew Maxine was upset, and she, as her Mum, her guardian and her friend, should have been there for her. She should have dropped everything. The bollocking she'd have got from Rachel later on would have been worth it, because Maxine would have still been alive. Maxine dropped everything for Steph when she was upset or angry, why hadn't she done the same for her? When it came to her job and Maxine, Maxine should have always come first. And today, she hadn't. And Steph hated herself for being so stupid. Because, if she had just stepped out into that hallway when Maxine had asked her to, she might still be here now.