I'll keep you safe

Chapter 142

The last place Steph wanted to go was where she was heading. To Charlotte's office. It was only 1:30pm, meaning that there was still another thirty minutes before Janeece's session. Steph wanted to talk to Charlotte one-on-one. She had thought about their earlier conversation regarding Janeece. Whilst she wasn't as reluctant as she thought she'd be, she had some questions.

When she got to the office and saw that Charlotte was alone, she sighed. She'd hoped that maybe she'd have a student in with her.

Charlotte looked up at her and smiled, waving at her to come in.

"Good timing, I could murder a cup of tea!" Charlotte said as she entered

Steph sighed, walking over to her desk.

"I, uhm- I just wondered what you thought would be achieved by me talking to Janeece?" she asked

"For her, a chance to draw a line in the sand" Charlotte explained

" 'Closure' you mean?" Steph huffed, rolling her eyes

Charlotte laughed.

"It's a bit hackneyed, I know. But it seems to work"

"And talking would make everything alright, would it?" Steph questioned, a dash of sarcasm laced in her tone

"You don't make something like this right. All any of us can do is find a way to live with it, the same way as Janeece is. She shared the last moments of her best friend's life. She needs to make sense of that" Charlotte corrected

"So why does that have to include me?" Steph challenged

"It doesn't. Not if you're set against it" Charlotte shrugged

"I don't know if I am or if I'm not" Steph mumbled

"Look, it wouldn't be all one-way traffic" Charlotte reasoned

"Do I look like I'd be sitting around hanging my emotions out to dry?" Steph huffed, rolling her eyes

"Probably not. I imagine you're a very resourceful woman. Strong"

Strong. The word caught Steph off guard. It took her back in time to last year.

She had been tidying away and had spotted some PSHE homework Maxine had left out on the kitchen table. The subject of the homework was to write about your role model.

In the question box 'What is the name of the person you look up to?', Maxine had written 'Steph Haydock'. In the question box below that was 'What are the best qualities of the person you look up to?', Maxine had written a few things down, one of them being 'She is strong and brave'.

The memory made her breath hitch in her throat, her eyes welling up with tears. She missed Maxine so much. It was little moments like that, that she longed for. If only she could turn back time...

"But you'd have to be. Not so many could go back to living in a house with so many memories, knowing it's where Maxine died" Charlotte continued

Steph nodded, swallowing the lump in her throat.

"I manage" she mumbled

"I don't doubt. Which is why I sought your help"

"My help?" Steph frowned

Charlotte sighed.

"The truth is, Janeece has me beat. I know there's something that she's still fighting. It's as if she feels guilty for what happened" she explained

Steph wanted to say Janeece wasn't the only one who felt guilty for what happened. But of all people, the last person who should feel guilty about any of this was Janeece. This wasn't her fault.