I Am No Jedi: Ahsoka x Reader

Chapter 69

"Stop. You're surrendering to your emotions again."

Windu stepped out of the shadows of the training room, his face shaped into a scowl, though whether it was his natural resting expression or not, y/n couldn't tell.

y/n stared forwards stubbornly, not willing to make eye contact. He gave an imperceptible nod and paused for a second before rushing again at the training MagnaGuard.

He barely stepped forward before Windu's deep voice cut him off. "You are impatient, young Padawan. Take the time to centre yourself."

y/n now had his back to Windu. He shut his eyes tight and bit down on his lip to prevent a retort. Impatience, annoyance, anger, it was true that those emotions filled him. How could they not?

All that y/n associated with the older Jedi were feelings of distrust, inferiority, and loathing. Windu had never been a supportive man when y/n was a youngling; he had vehemently argued against y/n joining the Order.

But the biggest injustice had been committed only a day ago. The memory of Ahsoka's presence growing further and further away as she disappeared down the Temple steps and into Coruscant was still fresh in his mind.

y/n knew that Windu was partially the reason why Ahsoka was expelled, and why she had ultimately left. Although his feelings were unjustified, as Windu couldn't have been the only one who voted to initially expel her, most of y/n's anger was concentrated towards him.

The MagnaGuard bent its knees and raced towards him, its skull-like face leering.

The potential flooded through y/n's tensed muscles as he readied himself to spring to the attack. Ever since the Separatist siege on Naboo, Juyo had become second nature to him.

Ducking under the swing of the MagnaGuard's electrostaff, y/n narrowed his eyes as his inner monologue continued.

It was so cathartic and liberating to channel his emotions into his fighting. It was against everything he had been taught previously, but it made him stronger, faster, more aggressive, and unpredictable.

He was unwilling, and unable to keep his feelings and his power separate. But even if he could, he was sure he would continue his old style, just to spite Windu.

Flipping in midair, he avoided the approaching droid, then slid under its legs and backed away slowly. He could now see Windu's face, half of it concealed in shadows. The Jedi Master looked unimpressed, bored, even.

Tightening his jaw, y/n leapt forwards towards the MagnaGuard. For a second he allowed himself to imagine that he was fighting against the obnoxious Jedi and that the purple electrostaff was a purple lightsaber, but when he blinked again, it was.

Windu stood in front of him, his eyes gleaming. y/n's red blade was locked against a purple one. The MagnaGuard lay deactivated on the ground beside them.

"Do not get ahead of yourself, young l/n," Windu commanded, then Force-pushed y/n back with a wave of his hand. "You should be grateful. Mindful. You are one of the few that I am giving the opportunity to learn this form."

As he spoke, the Jedi Master moved forwards, surging towards y/n. His aura seemed to crackle with unseen energy, and his expression was one of intensity. Windu's lightsaber moved with unimaginable speed, forcing y/n into defence.

"You underestimate my form. You, yourself, are too stubborn. Too proud. Those are traits we seek to exterminate from a Jedi."

y/n gritted his teeth, feeling the heated emotions building as the older man spoke each word, calmly almost, but with a bated heat behind them.