You Belong To My Angel { Mafia Story }

Kiana

8 - Kiana

I looked at my cell phone, then back at the door and then at my hands, which were shaking. How long had I been standing in front of the door to our apartment? If I remember correctly, it had been over 40 minutes.
I kept going over in my mind what had happened.
He had touched me.
He had said my name.
And I hated the fact that I liked it.
Shit. I had told him about my father. I was so stupid.
I breathed out heavily. I looked at my cell phone again.
Of course I hadn't listened to Nox, instead I had gone to a bank, transferred the money to my account and only put a few notes in my pocket. He had given me far too much anyway. I would never have earned that kind of money in one evening. Nevertheless, I accepted it to pay my father's debts. And as long as it was in my account, my father couldn't get at it.
After the bank, I took the S-Bahn home. I certainly wouldn't take a taxi.
But now I was standing in front of the door and my body was shaking.
With desire.
Frustration.
And fear.
And... worry. God, was I really worried about the guy?
He had completely lost it during that phone call. I hadn't understood a word, but that he had just left me standing there like that? It had bothered me.
I quietly put the key in the door and entered the apartment.
When I saw my father lying on the floor, totally drunk, between a few bottles, I sighed with exhaustion and went over to him. I nudged him with my foot. "Dad?"
He just groaned and grimaced.
Seeing him like that, after the last few days of work and after tonight, I just started to cry.
My life was so screwed up!
I went quietly to my room and dialed my half-brother's number. It was the middle of the night, but I knew he would always answer the phone. I sat down on my bed and let it ring.
"Is everything okay, Kiki?" he answered immediately.
I paused, needed a moment before I started to cry on the phone. "No, I'm totally exhausted. And there's this guy... God, I'm sick of it all!"
"What kind of guy?" he asked, like a big brother, and was worried. "Did he touch you?"
"Yes," I sobbed. Since I didn't understand at first that he meant it differently with the word "touched".
"What?! What's the motherfucker's name? I'll kill the guy!" He shouted immediately. "Did he do something you didn't want him to? Did he..."
I blinked in confusion, because I was slowly realizing. "No, Louis. Relax. He didn't do anything I didn't want him to. Listen..." I started, taking a deep breath. I let myself fall into my pillows. "I've been working a lot the last few days, barely sleeping or eating, and... Dad... he... he's completely drunk again and lying on the floor." I put my arm over my eyes. "Louis, sometimes I just don't have the strength anymore, you know? I'm so incredibly exhausted and our mother... she doesn't give a shit about us!"
There was a brief silence on the phone. "So nobody hassled you?"
"No, Louis. Besides, you know your little sister, I can defend myself just fine," I explained. I thought back to the moment when a gun was held to my head. Well, my resistance was probably not appropriate then.
Nox.
Why do I think of that bastard!
"Okay, so it's just your dad? I mean, don't get me wrong, but... are you still surprised that he is the way he is?"
I raised my nose. "No, but having to see it again and again is what's getting to me. You know how many times I've wanted to run away. But in the end I can't leave him behind, not like our mother."
"Maybe you should, Kiki. Your father might have to get knocked on the head to realize what he's doing to you." He sighed. "Should I come over? Is there anything I can do to help? Do you need money?"
I stared at the ceiling in my dark room and took a deep breath. Then I closed my eyes.
Money? No, I didn't need any more after that evening.
But I had just realized something. It wasn't right of me to accept all that money. I would give it back.
"I don't need any money, thanks," I replied, briefly pressing my lips together to suppress a quaver in my voice.
"Okay, but you know that I'm here for you, right? And... if you ever need a little cash, just let me know. I mean, as a first-year doctor, I'm still paying off my debts myself, but... I'd give something for you," Louis offered, and I was really grateful to him. But only when I was sure that my voice sounded more confident again did I continue.
"I'm going to get some sleep now, Louis. I really need it, and then the world will look completely different again."
I pretended to laugh.
"Good night and I'm grateful to have you. I love you, big brother," I said goodbye and hung up.
I just lay in my bed for a few minutes and thought. But since I was really exhausted, I fell asleep faster than usual.