Collide - SKAM Fan Fiction

Chapter Nine

Bullshit

I enter the ground of the school alone, I look around the courtyard to try find where everyone is. As I squint my eyes I finally see everyone sitting on the outdoor seats.

I smile walking towards them. Today's isn't too cold. No clouds are forming as I breath in and out, but I still need to wear a large sweater to keep myself warm.

I'm feeling like myself again, it usually takes awhile for me to feel normal. Last night was horrible. I couldn't fall asleep as my mind keeps wondering off. Usually after taking benzos i'm able to fall asleep so quickly. They tend to knock me out but I think by the time I had gotten home enough time had passed that I keep replaying Chris's expression when he found out about my pills. The scenarios I was creating in my head about what he could do about this new information drove me so crazy that I even during one of the coldest night I decided to take a walk around my block at 1am on he morning.

As I get closer I see their attention revert towards me, they greet me and I do the same back.

Placing my binder on the table before I even take a seat I notice they're in deep conversation. I shuffle my body comfortably into the cold stone and try listen.

"I'm going to try have sex with him." I hear Vilde say confidently. I stitch my eyebrows together not knowing what the hell is going on.

"Who are you going to have sex with?" I ask as I let my back rest on the cold stone chair.
I watch as Vilde changes her attention to me looking as if I should know the answer already.

"William of course." She chirps and I nod my head slowly. Not really agreeing with her but more just letting her know I'm listening. If I'm honest I'm unsure if this is a good idea.

"Are you sure you want too?" Noora ask and she nods her head with determination.

We continue to talk about the gossip around the school and how our Russ bus is going to get money and sponsors. Vilde takes charge always coming up with the idea and bringing up new concepts for us. She likes to think of herself as the leader even though all of us contribute our ideas just as much as she does. But it makes her happy I'm happy for her to take charge.

As we talk I see Christoffer coming out of Williams car slowly. I exam his body and watch as she slowly walks toward school. Today he is wearing black jeans with a white plain tee and a bomber jacket. Pressing my lips together I glance down at the wet stone avoiding all eye contact with him because of yesterday.

As they pass us Vilde greets William with a light hello, but then becomes disappointed when he does nothing but look at her blankly.

As she says hello, Christoffer's eyes search for mine and when I regretfully look up our eyes meet. Surprisedly his expression is very different to what I was expecting. His eyes are nothing but soft. Almost caring if I didn't know any better.  I quickly look down at my feet wishing that I never bothered looking up.

Suddenly all the over thinking I came up with the night before flooded my brain. I hated how out of everyone in this place he knows my secret.

I jolt up and pick my binder from the table, the heavy straps on my back cause me to
Shuffle uncomfortably and I do my best to fix the straps before waving at the girls to get to class.

Even thought I have 10 minutes. I need to go to my locker and sort out what books I need for today's class and a way to clear my brain of all the sudden anxiety I got by seeing Christoffer. As I enter the building I feel my body instantly warm up. I unwrap my scarfs and stuff it in my bag.