Collide - SKAM Fan Fiction

Chapter Twenty Seven

Making matters worst

I couldn't concentrate at all in history, it was as though the teacher was speaking but she was on mute all my brain could think of was Chris, about what happened today and what he meant by 'he'll fix it.'

With my blank piece of paper in front of me, I tap my pen against it having no clue what I should write. As the time ticks by the shorter my patience gets. It's the last class of today and jumping bed right about now and sleeping sounds amazing.

Taking a sip of my water bottle I glance around the room observing everyone. Timothy, the guy sitting in front of me must have gotten a haircut. His hair, a shagging brown was shorter than usual.

Sana looks tired, the bags under her eyes are becoming more pronounced and her yawns that occur every 3 minutes are becoming louder and louder.

I look out the window and notice the sun shining through the clouds. Then flashbacks of last night occur back in my head. Dropping my pencil on the ground I close my eyes trying to shake off the feeling.

Slowly reopening them I notice the few stares I got. With my heart beating a little faster I pick up my pen and continue to look outside. Some birds are flying across the windows and I let my eyes follow them admiring the fact that they are able to get up and go.

After learning what happened during the end of Friday night I have tried to push down any feelings of Thomas. Ignoring the anxiety that what could have happened that night I shake off any thought of him. I don't know what I should do about him.

but what I do know is this is not the time, I don't want to think about it and am choosing for now to ignore it.

Facing back to the front I try closing my eyes for a little bit imagining myself flying like the birds I admire outside. As if I was one of them. Chirping beautiful song and I get to glide through the sky. The cold air blows against my body. I bet to them everything seems so small from up here.

As though problems are nothing but a distant memory. I wonder if birds have problems. I mean all they have to do is try survive day by day but I can't help but wonder If they get anxious and if they do how lucky they are they get to fly away.

My daydream gets interrupted by the loud ringing of the bell. Opening my eyes I notice other students getting up to leave. Biting my lip I close my binder and place it in my bag.

For a second I forgot all about my worries and was able to fly around not giving a god damn worry in the world. How freeing that is.

Walking to the bathroom I enter a stool to empty myself before I go home. I probably drank half my drink bottle that lesson.

As I flush the toilet I hear two girls chatting whilst entering the bathroom. Feeling awkward I wait before unlocking the stool to go wash my hands.

"Did you hear about Chris and Grete?" One of the high pitch voices said. Biting my lip I wait wanting to hear what they are about to say.

"Yeah, apparently nothing happened," I smile happy that Chris sorted it out. As I turn the lock I hear them go on.

"No, apparently they were in there hooking up. People are saying he went down on her Chris she returned the favour " I let out a gasp before covering my mouth to try to mask the sound. They stop there talking for a second before hearing my horror but soon continue on again.

"Really? Who said this?"

"Chris himself, before the bell rang for the last class today he confirmed it to a couple of the other penetrators" My eyes widen and my jaw gaped open. My legs became jelly. Walking backwards I push the toilet seat cover down and sit in it.

What... how does this even make sense. I though he said he would fix the problem. I don't understand in what world this could be fixing anything.

Anger replaced the shock. My mouth felt dry and all I wanted to do is to find the blonde haired boy and confront him.

As soon as I heard the bathroom doors shut I finally exited my stool.Stomping my way through the now empty halls I furiously walk down the stairs and outside. With my blood beyond boiling point My eyes land on the Chris and narrows into poisons slits.

His eyes looking down at his phone as he walks alone. Running up to him my pulse begins to beat fast. I grit my teeth I have so much to say to him. So many swear words to let out.

"How dare you!" I spit.

He turns his body towards me and rips his attention away from his phone.

"What now?" He sighs. My face reddens and I hear my heart beat in My ears.

"You were going to make it better huh? By what? Telling them that I gave you a .." I stop not wanting to repeat what those girls said.

He presses his lips together and turns his body looking away from my eyes.

"Right when I think maybe I can trust you do this Chris, you're something else!" I shout. What was going through his mind? He couldn't let his stupid reputation be ruined. I am not someone he can use to advance his popularity. I don't know why it matters to him that people can't know that he was just helping me out.

"I'm something else huh? How about you?" My eyes turn into slits as I burn holes in his head. What did he just say? Is he trying to turn this to me?

"What Chris?! I'd love to see how you are going to turn this around on me. Cause you know what?! You don't care about anyone else's feeling but yourself. You always need to feed that big ego of yours because if you don't, you're scared that people might realise how lonely you actually are." I curse at him his eyes widen like for the first time someone sees him for who he is.

A guy who craves validation from everyone else because he never got it as a kid. Not the caring, protecting, interesting and dare I say funny Chris I have gotten to see.

His eyes meet mine, I saw the muscles in his jaw move. His stare was cold and intense. The clouds of air that was flowing out of his nostrils were dark and thick. He moved closer to me but I didn't dare to move in my spot.

"You know what your problem is? You care too much of what other people think! You do things for others and never for yourself. You go around quietly hoping no one notice you while you are out there judging people. You know If you stopped caring what other people thought of you and did what you truly want maybe you'd be happier" I roll my eyes somehow this man has been able to analyse me and flip it to make this my fault.

"Is it so bad if I actually care for people's feeling, maybe you should take notes." I crossed my arms in front of my steaming body raising an eyebrow.

He rolls his eyes again and reverts his eyes elsewhere before bringing back to me. Flicking his arms in the air in defeat while sighing he moves even closer to me.

"Is it fun being a doormat? People stepping on you and never getting what you want?" I shake my head in disbelief. He's comparing me to a door mat when he's nothing but a pig.

"Oh and I suppose you know what I 'want' " I snicker putting quotation marks on the word want.

He licks his lips and smirks before moving his head closer me. His warm breath against my skin. I can feel his heart beat as it moves fast in sync with mine. His smell that I am so familiar with lingering near my nose. I wait with my eyebrows stitched together waiting for his answer

"Me."