How to Lose your Best Friend

♢LXXVII♢

Blair

I watched as Eagle strolled through the front doors of the school with her arm wrapped around someone who wasn't me. I watched as she made her way to the dance floor and wrapped her arms around the waist of someone who wasn't me. She had a cup of something unknown in it. The night became blurry by a quarter past ten. I could tell that he was in a hurry to be touching her skin. I watched as he grabbed her hips and pulled her in. He kissed her lips and whispered in her ears. I knew that she shouldn't listen to him. She probably knew that as well. But there she went. Through the backdoors of the school and to somewhere unknown. With the boy that claimed to want to marry her. But it was obvious that all he wanted was her body.

In the meantime, I watched as they announced prom king and queen. Of course, Antonio won. Everyone loves him. He has no idea what it's like to have problems. Sure he didn't get Eagle but he can get any girl he wants. All he has to do is go up to a girl and she'll automatically sleep with him. He'll never know what it's like to be completely in love with someone who will never love you back. Sometimes I wonder what it's like to live his life. To be the center of attention and everyone wants to know everything about you.

I couldn't stand to watch Antonio bathe in all the glory he was getting. I decided to get a drink when I ran into PJ. I don't think I've actually talked to him for about a year. I'd like to be polite and strike up a friendly conversation with him but I only had one question for him on my mind.

"Why do you say you're going to marry Eagle? You're in high school. Isn't it early for you to be thinking about that?" I asked.

PJ looked a little bit confused by my question but just laughed at my question.

"If you're not dating to get married then you're dating to break up. The purpose of dating someone is to see if they'll be a good partner for marriage. I'm with her so I can protect and expand her heart. Not to break it," he responded before walking away.

I watched as he returned to his table with Eagle handing her a drink and I headed back to mine. I thought to myself that I could be me instead of him. But here I sit at a table by myself. Watching as Antonio gets accused of liking his best friend's girlfriend. It was obvious that he envied PJ for having Eagle but who wasn't. She was a gem that caught the eyes of many and even Antonio couldn't make her his.

Part of me hated him for that but the other part of me questioned my own judgment. After just talking to him, PJ seemed serious. I always thought that he was out to hurt her. But when it came to Eagle he was nothing but serious. He saw a future with her. He wanted to see her walking down the aisle.  What did I see in her? A potential girlfriend? No. I didn't even want to date her. I gave that opportunity up. I didn't know what I wanted with her.

She told me that all I did was use her. I played with her and left her once I was tired. She said that I just thought of her as a toy but she couldn't be more wrong. I thought of her as someone who has always been by my side. But I guess that was hard to see when all I did was treat her like shit. I didn't expand her heart and I definitely didn't protect it. It looks like all I seemed to do was break it just so someone else could come and fix it.