Hello to my lovely audience! As always, i have not changed my name and i am the same person on the internet who is wasting your time by updating this book frequently. But wait! don't go!
Cuz today is the day when i bring in a special guest who has a terrible blood fetish. And don't worry this chapter is not rated mature since tbh 60% of my audience itself is below 18.
Uhm! i present to you all.....
*drumroll*
Edblood suckpire! And since you can never guess by his NAME that who he is... well.... he is a VAMPIRE!
now where are my pitchforks and torches?
While i search for things like holy water, pitch forks etc i notice that my guest is not entering the room. I for a moment wonder whether is he batman or some freak who likes to stand in a dark corner like a creep while holding the bottle of holy water in my hand.
and then it hits me like a tonne of bricks! The lights! The lights are on! I turn off the lights and hold a lantern in my hand as a pale-ass + slim-ass guy who looks like as if he is going through the emo-goth post-puberty stage settles down on the guest chair.
Edblood: Thanks.
Me: So Edblood! how are you? also, how to get a girl? please base your answer on your personal experiences.
Edblood: Uhh.. i'm fine. though, i could have been better if the interview was at night. Me and sun aren't the best of friends.
Me: I think you are confusing yourself with a Dracula.
Edblood: We are here on wattpad. where are you from? the moon? are we (vamp and Dracula) both suppose to be 2 different entities?
Me: well... yeah...
Edblood: Then why is my name Edblood? Anyway, how to get the girl? easy peesy! Do it the vampire way! First, you see a girl or find something that looks close to a girl but beware! don't ever fall for james charles! James charle's bad.
Me: Ouch... then?
Edblood: yous suck her blood!
Me: WHAT! what is wrong with all of you guys here on wattpad? WHY CAN'T YOU GUYS BE NORMAL AND JUST ASK HER OUT OR SOMETHING INSTEAD OF BEING A BUNCH OF CREEPY POTATOES?
Edblood: You seem to be having a midlife crisis. Anyway, you mark her in that way and be the iconic seductive vamp that girls these days cry over while watching twilight and there you have yourself a girl!
Me: Just that?
Edblood: Well there are trials and tribulations on the way and the 50 shades of wattpad too during the whole story. Also, you can throw in a werewolf for more drama. LOOK! i just gave you an idea!
Me: Okay.. to put it in a nutshell, you just bite the girl, suck her blood and voila! you end up getting her eventually? You sound like an annoying mosquito.
Edblood: Mind you, the one that have two legs, the body of an Instagram model and the face of a Greek god! and ooh, i'm also sometimes tan too despite never getting out in the sun.
Me: The abs you drew with your moms eyeliner gotta be impressive right? Bet, all those abducted or seduced girls appreciate 'em. How do they even forgive you?
Edblood: (confused) what type of-
Me: (angrily cuts in) -GIRL ON WATTPAD DO THAT? NONE! ABSOLUTELY NONE!
Edblood: Geezum, mate. chill. Just ask the last question.
Me: okay... since you have a blood fetish... a gross question here.....what happen when she is on her ......periods?
Edblood: Tampoons are equal to interesting tea bags!!!!
Me: Oh My God... please get out of here before i cleanse your sinfully disgusting entirety with holy water blessed by cool_reader_ since she is the one who gave me the idea to write this chapter!
Edblood: uhhh.. bye.
With this said, the studio collapsed which concluded this series and the return of regular chappies. Though lemme know if i forgot someone... i can always interview them some other time.
Be sure to comment, vote and tag! it honestly means a lot!
Love,
lizzy
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