My lovely Wattpad rant book, focusing on multiple Cliché and over used tropes with enough salt, pepper and olive oil to appease Gordon Ramsay.
Ever reach a point in life when every werewolf/Vampire fic you read seems like the one you read earlier b...
PREVIOUSLY: Our imperfect MC aka Blue Pineapple had a convo with Peter goodguyson and realized that since he is the good guy she can never end up with him. Afterwards she opened her social media and saw the mean bully aka Britney spears who is a cheer leader and *GASP* blonde, waving at Xavier. HOW DARE BRITNEY TRY STEALING XAVIER! Now blue pineapple wants to come up with a plan with her #Diverse friend who is none other but Paprika salsa shamshila rihanna red pineapple.
Let's see what happen next.
------------
I am so upset right now! I feel like crying!
And then it happens!
My eyes start peeing with sadness.
HOW COULD SHE? HOW COULD THAT USED BUBBLEGUM FACE BRITNEY WITH HER SLUTTY CLOTHES GO ABOUT STEALING MY MAN!
Just then the doorbell rings and I scramble on my feet to open it. Even though I have mentioned in the previous chapter that peter goodguyson is doing my homework and eating icecream while listening to Taylor swift after i rejected him, i'm gonna act like as if he is gone and POOF! HE IS GONE.
After all, with great power comes great responsibility.
I open the door and see my friend. I hug her and my eyes start peeing again. I am so sed. lyf is unfair 4 real. I look at her with watery eyes.
"Britney the bitch waved at Xavier. What should I do?"
My friend smiled in a most manipulative manner ever. Even though the readers and the author know that this specific 'best friend' is notorious for giving bad advice, I will still follow her blindly. The story can be a lot more shorter if it's not for me screwing up by following bad advice. But then again, since the best friend is under the #diverse tag, we cannot make her seem like the bad guy. She can suggest two routes and then i'll pick the most ridiculous one. AHHHH! I am shoo relatable! And everyone make mistakes, doe.
"Blue, woman up! Listen, you can perhaps talk to Britney and sort it all out in a rational manner. OR, you can wear tissue paper after slut-shaming Britney for wearing shorts and then go to a party and grind on ever guy so that the author can put the #WomenEmpowerment tag while ignoring that exploiting women and objectifying them as sexual objects is not empowerment. Afterwards, you can get pregnant in that party and enter into an abusive/manipulative relationship with Xavier. Because of the BABY HE WILL NEVER LEAVE YA!"
Red pineapple beams as I judge her, questioning her mental capabilities. How crazy a person has to be to suggest something this ridiculous.
THERE IS NO WAY I AM TALKING TO BRITNEY! I'll take the rational route.
"Also, we will sabotage Britney by raiding her locker ans filling it with junk. Don't worry reader, you just have to support the MC. Because Britney is the antagonist."
I smile ear to ear at my friends suggestion and shortly after we both leave for a Justin Beiber concert to chill. My friend has back stage passes and after the concert I AM INVITED BACK STAGE!
OMG!
Justin didn't choose my friend, rather he chose me.
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG
The backstage looks like a backstage, smells like a backstage, sounds like a backstage, breathe like a back stage, cries like a backstage, and is actually a backstage!!!
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
So while Justin and I am chilling, Justin suddenly says, "Listen blue pineapple, you are officially mine and I have been waiting for you for so long! I cant believe you showed me the meaning of life in just 5 minutes and now i wanna marry you!! Also, i am a vampire king!"
H e suddenly grow fangs and run towards me.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
I flee from the monster of the night but then being the dumb bish I am, i get CAUGHT!
