Her sweet chains

Part 14

Chapter 14

2 months later

As the summer slid by Derek and I both kept to our words maybe too well as according to Dean living with Derek was suddenly "like living with ten bitches with permanent chronic PMT." (This had apparently led to his request that I 'finally just go do Derek'), and I know that I hadn't exactly been pure sunshine to live with. The honest truth was I missed Derek. I missed him so much it felt like I was constantly waiting for my heart to start beating. I had never had been away from him for so long and everything inside me told me to give up on this stupid crusade and go to Derek. Go Apologise, go bite my tongue and say sorry, say please, kiss him, hell fuck him whatever happened as a result of that had to be better than the agony I was enduing by staying away from him. But I was bloody stubborn, and more to the point I had made it worse. For the first few days we'd mutually avoided each other, Then Derek obviously thinking I had calmed down adequately tried to, well I'm not actually sure what he was trying to do just talk to me I assume, but Derek seemed to have underestimated how much he actually had pissed me off because in all those days the second he walked into a room I turned and walked out. This carried on for a few days before I completely pissed him off and he gave up trying. I could still occasionally hear him or smell his scent but before I even got close to him he would disappear. We saw each other at the two meets of course well in fact I saw Derek but I knew in those meetings he was trying so hard not to see me his beautiful eyes locked anywhere else as though the space that occupied me was merely empty air not worth bestowing his attention on. Although I hate myself for admitting it his disregarding of my presence was more painful than anything else I had ever felt before. But I was stubborn and I refused to yield so me and Derek mutually refused to even be in the same room with each other. As June turned to July and turned to August I learnt to deal with this pain it didn't lessen at all but I just got used to it. but the rest of the pack didn't , none of them liked or understood what we were doing and so kept persisting in trying to get us to talk to each other, which was of course what Carl was attempting as he accompanied me on my 'punishment walk'. I couldn't even remember what it was I was being punished for probably being goby with Darius that was usually the sort of thing I did lately, but this punishment I could more than deal with as all I was required to do was walk through our grounds and collect up the torn discarded clothes shoes etc that were littered around. Carl and me were both already carrying a backpack each filled with various items of clothes, as well as large duffels we were now filling but the amount of clothing we were encountering this far from the den was seriously depleted. I looked over at Carl as I sensed him watching me. He sighed and looked away a slight blush on his cheeks stupid boy did he think I didn't know why he was here?

"I wanted to talk to you Jess." He said to his feet, I growled lightly

"I'm stunned but you want me to make a wild guess as what it is you want to say?"

"He's really sorry." Carl said gently,

"No he's not."

"You upset him too you know that's why he wont speak to you he wants to but he thinks you'll."

"Don't Carl." I cut in "just don't."

"Jess you both miserable like this. And anyway your leaving in what two weeks now."

"Yeah that should make it easier to avoid each other." I said coldly, "and I'm not miserable." I snapped,

"You two miss each other like hell."

"Well I'm sure he misses me I'm adorable but I don't miss him." I snapped even though I knew how childish this made me sound.

"You don't miss him." Carl asked levelly.