haikyuu reacts to ships

Semi x Shirabu / Semishira

(A/N - this is for @ionlysimpforsetters ~!)

Shirabu: no. uh uh. no way.

Tendou: awwww Shira-Kun you don't think Semi Semi is at least a little bit cute?

Shirabu: Semi? Eita? No. Semi is not cute. He is an evil goblin man who eats your worst nightmares for breakfast and will sneak up behind you and steal your spinal chord like that *snaps fingers for emphasis*

Semi: I can't even begin to decipher what that means but I dunno Shirabu's kinda hot.

Shirabu: Don't believe him those are mind games.

Semi: wait, so you don't believe you're attractive?

Shirabu: No I know I'm a fucking gem. I just don't believe you could ever find me attractive.

Semi: why?

Shirabu: ...

Shirabu: I-

Shirabu: I....don't know you just- you're- I-

Tendou: Shira-Kun do you need a minute?

Shirabu: No I'm leaving for completely unrelated reasons.

Taichi: Okay but seriously Semi. We're you fucking with him because that's kind of mean?

Semi: No. I don't know why people think I'm being sarcastic. Shirabu is good looking. It's actually more insulting that you think someone couldn't find him honestly attractive.

Ushijima: I was not under the impression that Shirabu and Eita-San had any romantic interest in each other?

Tsukki: To be fair, you're not great at impressions in general.

Tendou: Ah Tsukishima, you're here.

Tsukki: don't sound so thrilled.

Atsumu: this energy is intense what the fuck-

Hinata: shhhhh they're communicating. Tendou-San is the only person to date able to intimidate Tsukki-San.

Daichi: Yeah, dude's got serious game. Like if I wasn't convinced that Tsukki is the devil using the earth as his play thing, I would think Tendou could actually take his ego down a peg.

Goshiki: I like Semi-San and Shirabu-San together!! They're so cute!!!

Hinata: I agree Goshiki-San!!! They have such a cute dynamic !!!!

Yachi: They certainly look cute together, I mean, Look at their blush-y little cheeks and Semi-San's smile!!

Saeko: True. They are Precious™.

Tanaka: Can we go back to the beginning where Shirabu called Semi a spinal chord thief?

Semi: He's creative with insults when he's not having a mental breakdown.

Yachi: when ships Say Random Facts About Each Other Without Prompting™

Semi: Everybody knows that-

Tendou: Actually Semi Semi, everybody doesn't know that because everybody doesn't get insulted on a daily basis by Shira-San.

Hinata: Its like insult flirting!!! They say mean things to each other but they're really saying 'you're so cute I want to kiss you'!!!

Atsumu: so like...exactly like ya an' Kageyama?

Hinata: WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP SAYING THAT THOSE ARE ACTUAL INSULTS INTENDED TO ACTUALLY HURT FEELINGS.

Kageyama: YEAH I WOULD NEVER FLIRT WITH THAT CARROT ASS BITCH BOY-

Hinata: AND I WOULD NEVER SAY ANYTHING REMOTELY ROMANTIC TO THAT GINORMOUS SAD BABY MAN-

Atsumu: y'guys are horrible at this.

Hinata: THAT'S NOT FAIR YOU CAN ONLY SAY THAT BECAUSE YOU AND OMI-SAN ARE THE BEST AT IT.

Atsumu: exactly.

Sakusa: don't bring me into this.

Atsumu: too later yer already here.

Semi: Miya-San is right. I've been flirting with Shirabu since high school.

Shirabu: What-

Tendou: Okay Okay cool cool, but why are you so open about admitting this now? Why not just tell him in high school?

Semi: because i'm an adult now and Shirabu can't punch me in the face without serious repercussions.

Tendou: Oh please, you're scared of Shirabu?

Semi: everyone is scared of Shirabu. I'm still scared of Shirabu. At least now if he hurts me I can sue his ass.

Tendou: The worst he'd do is aggressively kiss you.

Semi: Yeah. Do you know how aggressive Shirabu can be?

Taichi: He actually has a point there...

Shirabu: I CAN STILL FUCKING HEAR YOU-

Semi: shit-

Shirabu: I CAN BE NICE AND PLEASANT IF I FUCKING WANT TO-

Unicorn-Flowers: Yes Shirabu hun I'm sure you can but why don't we get some ratings just, y'know, to save Semi's life?

Semi: 9/10 I like him but he's scary as fuck.

Tendou: mmmmm 9/10 I just adore them together. Plus, you don't know how painful watching them dance around each other is.

Hinata: 10/10 they're cute !!!!!

Unicorn-Flowers: Great! Why don't we end on that nice note before-

Shirabu: 0/10. Spinal. Chord. Thief.

Unicorn-Flowers: Seriously what the fuck.