haikyuu reacts to ships

Oikawa x Ushijima / Ushioi

Oikawa: ahhHHHHHHHHHHH*screaming continues*

Tendou: Author-Chan, this was bad. 

Unicorn-Flowers: I know I'm sorry! I know Oikawa hates him but it's a legit ship-

Ushijima: Oikawa hates me?

Everyone: ...

Tendou: I-...

Iwa: Well he certainly doesn't like you.

Makki: Something's wrong, Iwa's too enthusiastic. 

Mattsun: Obviously he would be enthusiastic about the fact that Oikawa hates Ushijima because he's in looooove~

Iwa: I'll literally punch you. I've done it to Trashikawa more than once. You shold be very afraid. 

Kageyama: thIS FEELS SO WRONG-

Hinata: I thought you would like this Kageyama!?? It's your new teammate with your old mentor!! It's like you have two awesome older brothers!!

Kageyama: OIKAWA HATES ME AND USHIJIMA STILL THINKS MY NAME IS TOBIAS. 

Ushijima: wait, it's not?

Kageyama: it neVER HAS BEEN. THIS IS MY NIGHTMARE-

Oikawa: I'm stuck between my deep and unabiding love for Iwa-Chan and really wanting to stick it to Kageyama WHY DOES THE UNIVERSE LIKE TO SEE ME SUFFER?

Iwa: Maybe cuz you're a bitch. 

Tsukki: Lol yeah. 

Iwa: Shut up I'm the only one who gets to call him that. 

Tsukki: What is it your pet name for him?

Iwa: No! And if we did have pet names his would be Shittykawa!

Oikawa: Horrible use of the term 'pet name' but I'll take what I can get. 

Saeko: I'll be honest with you, it's actually sorta hot. 

Tanaka: really ?

Saeko: Sorry they're just both so....thick. Like built as hell. I have my preferences, what can I say?

Yachi: wait...so you're not lesbian? I mean- I'm not crying. Woulda been nice to have like a gay older sister who's not related to me by blood kinda thing. 

Saeko: Relax little bean. I'm bi. Like super bi. 

Yachi: A POWERFUL BI ICON CALLED ME LITTLE BEAN MY LIFE IS COMPLETE-

Mattsun: okay okay we're getting way off topic here. The real question is if all their smushing would be hate-smushing.

Makki: true true, but then would their whole relationship just be really heated foreplay? riddle me this-

Daichi: Wait wait, did that guy from Seijoh just refer to sex as 'smushing'?

Mattsun: One, i have a name and it's better then yours, two, the reference is from brooklyn 99 only the greatest police drama comedy of this century excuse you. 

Yachi: is everyone from Seijoh mean but hot enough to pull it off as an aesthetic? 

Makki: Actually yes that accurately describes all of us- Except Kyoutani. He's just mean, but also hot, the two have nothing to do with each other.

Yachi: wow, everyone from Karasuno is like...the opposite-

Hinata: HEY YACHI WHY.

Kageyama: Really Yachi? You of all people?

Suga: Yachi no. 

Tsukki: Love you Yachi but seriously what the fuck-

Yachi: I'M SORRY I WAS TRYING TO SAY YOU'RE ALL REALLY NICE I DIDN'T MEAN TO CALL YOU UGLY. 

Daichi: that's not even true. tsukki's the devil.

Yachi: he was always nice to me...?

Tsukki: wrong. I was nice to you one time when you were crying and you just ignored every single time i called you whiny or a baby or a weak-spirited-newborn-

Nishinoya: OKAY I THINK WE GET IT TSUKISHIMA YOU SUCK. THERE'S NO NEED TO MAKE HER CRY AGAIN.

Unicorn-Flowers: Oh god can we just get ratings please?

Saeko: 6/10. 'S hot. 

Oikawa: 0/10 IT'S A MONSTROSITY.

Iwa: honestly like 1/10 but only because it would mean I wouldn't have to deal with Trashykawa's whore-ass anymore-

Unicorn-Flowers: OKAY LOVELY SenTIMENT. I think we should end on that please yes okay.