haikyuu reacts to ships

Atsumu x Kita / Atsukita

(A/N - this is for @cha0t1cx , @Kazuaki-chan and @xXkii-chanXx ~!)

Atsumu: Nah, kita an' me are cool.

Kita: it's kita and i.

Atsumu: Kita an' me are no longer cool.

Kita: Kita and-

Atsumu: seriously don't.

Suna: am i the only one who actually thought Kita was a robot or like...?

Aran: I think we all thought that.

Atsumu: Yup.

Osamu: Yeah.

Kita: The Miya twins finally agree on something. It must be true.

Suna: did ya just vote yerself a robot-

Kita: why not? it makes logical sense.

Suna: yer... somethin' special Kita.

Bokuto: Oh My God They Could Be Highschool Sweethearts It Would Be So Cute-

Atsumu: i beg ta differ. Kita's scary as fuck. Like I literally had nightmares about the dude in high school.

Kita: Thank you.

Atsumu: what???

Bokuto: But you admit you dreamt about him???

Atsumu: I dream about all my teammates ?!

Bokuto: OH WHAT AM I DOING IN YOUR DREAMS???

Atsumu: Mostly eatin' cheetos and cryin'. Hinata jumped off the Empire State Building, did six flips on the way down, an' landed in his feet. Meian is always in a pink apron an' bakes me cookies.

Atsumu: Barnes just sits in the full splits an' stares at me like a fuckin' lunatic. Adriah and Shion just sit in the corner an' make out-

Adirah: what?

Shion: i'm sorry what-

Atsumu: have I made my point yet?

Hinata: what about Omi-San?

Atsumu: I skipped Omi-Kun fer a reason.

Hinata: Yeah but why-

Tsukki: you're literally denser than concrete how the fuck-

Suna: oh god. Karasuno's involved.

Hinata: Hey!! I'm Tsumu-San's teammate now too !!!

Aran: that entire team is made up of fluffy bunny rabbits who are sometimes demon bunny rabbits. Ya never know which one ya get until yer bein' eaten alive.

Suga: That literally made no sense but i still choose to think it was a compliment.

Yachi: I HATE IT THE DYNAMIC MAKES NO SENSE ATSUMU NEEDS SOMEONE TO BANTER WITH.

Atsumu: Yacchan's right though. Humor is my only redeeming quality besides my abs.

Osamu: yer only redeeming quality is that yer human so ya need sleep which means that there's at least eight hours a day that the world doesn't haveta suffer yer presence.

Atsumu: why're ya like this 'Samu? Where did I go wrong?

Osamu: remember when we were seven andja stole my Vabo-Chan plushie?

Atsumu: oh shit okay i see it now.

Hinata: Tsumu-Kun! What is Kita-San even like?

Atsumu: he's like OmiOmi without the mean.

Bokuto: So like... his heart could be made of ice but you wouldn't know because sometimes he displays like, one emotion so you have to give him the benefit of the doubt?

Sakusa: is that really how you see me?

Bokuto: yes..? don't kill me though I don't know what my health insurance is like.

Sakusa: you're a professional athlete.

Bokuto: yes and?

Suna: is everyone on yer team stupid?

Atsumu: exCUSE ME MEIAN AN BARNES ARE VERY INTELLIGENT.

Suna: the fact thatcha didn't even try ta defend yerself speaks volumes.

Kita: statistically speaking, college graduation rates of professional non-college athletes is generally low.

Bokuto: he's like the human incarnation of Google.

Osamu: that's true. ya can literally ask him anythin' he's probably got an answer. Honestly, Tsumu, I think Kita'd be good fer ya. He smart, he's got a stable job, he's classically attractive, ya both like foxes-

Atsumu: ya literally sound like ma.

Osamu: well sometimes ma's right. i mean, the woman only fuckin' raised us so...

Hinata: Actually Tsumu-Kun, I know you don't want to hear this, but he's right. A nice guy with a stable source of income, you're kind of a whore right now so-

Atsumu: WHOA-

Bokuto: UNCALLED FOR SHO.

Meian: That wasn't cool dude.

Adirah: Seriously sho? Like we all knew it but you didn't have to call Tsumu out like that.

Hinata: WHAT DID I DO WRONG?? IT JUST MEANS HES SINGLE AND LOOKING FOR DATES-

Atsumu: oh my god. he doesn't know what the word whore means.

Unicorn-Flowers: y'all, i'm really tryina be chill here, but don't use the w-word again or i'll banish your asses.

Osamu: LMFAO THOUGH SHOUYOU'S RIGHT YER A WHORE I GET TA CALL YA THAT CUZ I'M YER BROTHER.

Atsumu: THE FUCK YA TALKING 'BOUT I DON'T GOTTA BROTHER NO MORE.

Unicorn-Flowers: holy shit this got long. okay luvs, time for some quick ratings before we go. no explanations required-

Yachi: 0/10 sakuatsu is king.

Atsumu: like 5/10 kita's not bad but we're not like that at all.

Sakusa 0/10.

Atsumu: ya literally skipped out on like this whole chapter why are ya ratin' this?

Yachi: because he's in love with you.

Sakusa: Yachi seriously-

Yachi: that's not a no. you're making things worse for yourself.

Saksua: i literally hate all of you.

Osamu: literally 10/10 Kita's responsible as fuck-

Unicorn-Flowers: I literally just told you not to give explanations. Why can't you follow simple directions-

Osamu: TSUMU NEEDS TO KNOW I HAVE HIS BACK AN ALSO HOPE HE FALLS FACE FIRST INTO A FIRE ANT PILE.

Atsumu: I LOVE YA AN HATECHA SO MUCH SHUT THE FUCK UP.

Unicorn-Flowers: literally what is your relationship-

Meian: seriously, don't open that can of worms.