haikyuu reacts to ships

Atsumu x Ushijima / Ushiatsu

Hinata: Oof both of Sakkun's boyfriends dating each other that must suck I'm sorry Sakkun!!!

Yachi: No no, Hinata, sorry but Kiyoomi-San is only dating Atsumu-

Bokuto: Or Ushijima, I mean, it's not like their personalities don't align perfectly well-

Sakusa: i'm not dating either of them i am alone and it will stay that way.

Atsumu: Ya know that sounds really sad, right?

Sakusa: No one asked for your opinion you leech.

Atsumu: hmm an' what exactly am I suckin' from ya?

Sakusa: my will to live.

Atsumu: Ya can't just ignore blatantly sexual innuendos like that?!

Sakusa: watch me.

Ushijima: I don't know if me and Miya-San would work well together. Our personalities seem to differ greatly.

Atsumu: Yeah actually Ushiwaka-San's right. We're not really built fer each other like that. I don't know howta deal with someone who has no discernible emotions, like at least Omi-Kun expresses hatred.

Ushijima: And I do not understand Miya-San's face. It's a mess, quite frankly.

Sakusa: I've been saying this for years.

Bokuto: It's true! He literally expresses so much!!

Atsumu: Hey! Excuse me look who's talkin'?! Y'cry whenever Akaashi even enters the conversation! Yer still cryin' from last chapter!

Bokuto: doN'T CALL ME OUT LIKE THAT-

Atsumu: THEN DON'T AGREE WITH OMI-KUN WHEN HE SAYS MEAN THINGS ABOUT ME-

Yachi: Is it just me or does the dynamic feel totally off on this one? Like, Atsumu could try with the witty banter but Ushijima-San wouldn't get it?

Semi: She's right he takes everything literally. Sarcasm is lost on him.

Tendou: Trust me, we've tried.

Osamu: But sarcasm is 'Tsumu's only personality trait. Other than concieted. An' Annoyin'.

Atsumu: Thank ya, brother, ya always make my day.

Osamu: Happyta help.

Ushijima: But he insulted you. Why would you thank him?

Yachi: Do you see what I mean?

Saeko: The only reason I can sort of see it being cute is because they've both got mad cake-

Atsumu: what is it with you an' thighs? An' who are ya?

Yachi: She's a warrior goddess who happens to be related to one of Karasuno's old outside hitters.

Tanaka: is that all I am to you?

Yachi: *nervous sweating* HAHA OF COURSE NOT I LOVE YOU- *checks hand* RHINOSAURUS.

Saeko: oof that's gotta sting.

Yachi: I"M SORRY-

Hinata: This is the first one I can't actually see happening. Do you know how many times Atsumu-Kun has tried to trash talk Ushijima-San across the net and failed?

Bokuto: Oh yeah! Every time he turns back and looks at us like he's lost a part of his soul.

Atsumu: because it's soul-crushing. At least Komori responds. But he's always nice ta me. S'fuckin' weird.

Sakusa: One thing we can agree on.

Komori: Ouch I'm just tryina be a nice person but if that's what you and your boyfriend are bonding over then I'm not going to get in the way of tha-

Sakusa: I will disown you.

Komori: yOU CAN'T DISOWN ME.

Sakusa: Not literally. But in every other way it's entirely possible.

Unicorn-Flowers: ahHAHAH Why don't we stop this before someone does something he really regrets-

Sakusa: I have no regrets because I actually think about decisions before I make them.

Atsumu: STOP STARIN' AT ME I'VE DONE NOTHING WRONG-

Unicorn-Flowers: PLEASE JUST GIVE SOME RATINGS-

Hinata: 3/10 it's not realistic and they have no common interests other than volleyball...

Ushijima: 2/10 I have no romantic interest in Atsumu.

Sakusa: I'm not rating this one.

Unicorn-Flowers: Please, please just cooperate. First Yaku then Tsukishima. Not you too. nOT YOU TOO-

Sakusa: Everytime I rate something with Atsumu in it Yachi ambushes me.

Yachi: Then stop giving ratings that make you look jealous.

Sakusa: So what you want me to lie?

Yachi: So basically what you're saying is that you are jealous which is why you're rating them low?

Sakusa: What- No-

Yachi: You're really backing yourself into a corner here. Like how do you not hear yourself?

Hinata: She's right though you're not making a good case for yourself!

Sakusa: Ugh how do you have the energy to keep harassing me-

Unicorn-Flowers: As much as I would love to hear this interrogation, we have to be fair to Sakusa (because I don't know if I can handle three misanthropes at once). why don't we move on?

Yachi: NO I WAS JUST GETTING SOMEWHERE-