Depression/ anxiety one shots

Hotel calls (tw sh⚠️)

"Baby oh my god what happened!" Said my girlfriend when she saw me on the hotel bathroom floor my arms and legs bloody and my eyes shut.

Her voice woke me up and I instantly broke into tears. She rushed up to me and pulled me into her arms trying to comfort me.

" It's okay my love, it's all gonna be okay." She said crying too.

" I'm so sorry Dee. I'm so sorry." I cried out.

She held my head closer to her chest and smoothed my hair.

" Its okay baby. You don't have to apologize. I'm here and I'm going to help you now okay." She said and I nodded against her.

She gently sat me up and grabbed a washcloth wetting it before squatting back down.

" Alright baby, I gotta see how bad these are." She said and wiped the rag slowly across my body until she had a cleaner view.

"Good you don't need stitches. I'll just disinfect and bandage you up now okay." She said and I nodded.

As she cleaned my cuts I started to cry harder and she stopped briefly to make eye contact with me.

" You want to talk about this right now?" She asked.

" Yeah, it's, it's just that I feel so guilty. I was clean nearly two years and I just fucked it up. I'm really sorry I let you down." I said shakily through tears.

" It is okay my love." Dee said giving my hand a squeeze. " Relapse happens during recovery. I'm not upset with you so don't be too hard on yourself."

She finished cleaning me up and picked me up off the ground and carried me to the bed.

" Can I get you anything love?" She asked.

" Water please." I said softly and slightly unsure as I didn't want to be a burden to her.

She grabbed me a bottle out of the mini fridge and handed it to me before going around the other side of the bed and laying right beside me.

" Thank you." I said.

" Of course." She said. " If there's anything else you need or want just say the word okay."

" Okay." I said.

I lay my head on her shoulder and she put something on the tv for us mainly as background noise.

" I feel so ugly." I said and she gently turned my head towards hers.

" Hey, don't talk about my girlfriend like that. She's so beautiful I can't even breathe half the time I'm around her because she takes my breath away." Dee said and smiled at me making me smile for a second before it faded away.

" Thanks." I said. " But how can I still be attractive to you with all these scars?" I asked.

" These scars?" She said tracing her fingers over the old scars that lingered on the outskirts of the currently bandaged areas on my body. " These show that you are strong and that you can overcome any hardship. And you know what, those qualities are very attractive. Also they are part of you, and I love all of you, always."

I pulled her face in gently and kissed her before I said in almost a whisper. " Thank you so much, you're the most amazing woman I could ever dream of being with. I love you to the ends of the earth."

This time she kissed me and that turned into us making out before she pulled away.

" I love you and I love kissing you, but you're in a super vulnerable state right now and I never want to take advantage of that. How about we just cuddle and if you want to talk more about why this happened I'm here for that and if you don't that's okay too, we can just watch a movie." She said tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

I nodded and snuggled into her arms, just laying in silence for a minute before speaking.

" Someone sent my mom a link to my social media and she knows about us now. She called me and it didn't go well. She basically told me that I'm disgusting and she doesn't want anything to do with me if I, and I quote, " continue to live a sinful life." ." I said and stated to cry again.

" Oh sweetie I'm so so sorry. You don't deserve to be treated that way and I hope you know that there is nothing wrong or bad about our love and nobody can tell us otherwise and be correct. I wish she wasn't that way but you always have me to lean on when people are hateful towards you and towards us. It's hard but sometimes we just have to realize that if they can't be supportive, than we are better without them in our lives." She said and kissed my forehead.

I looked up and her and nodded with tears in my eyes.

" You're right. It just made me spiral, but next time I feel that way I'll call you right away, okay." I said.

" Thank you baby. I'll always come straight to you if you need me, even if I'm on the other side of the world." She said and I smiled before leaning back on her and falling asleep in her arms.