TF2 One-Shot Fanfics

All The Mercs - Swapped Bodies

Just another normal day on the battlefield, scout was running around, soldier was rocket jumping, pyro was spy checking, demo was charging with the charge and targe, heavy was shooting sasha, engie was setting up a sentry, medic was ubercharging the heavy, sniper was getting headshots and spy was invisable, everything was as normal, after the battle, everyone was tired out so they went to bed early but in the night engie's teleporter went wild and the respawn started to act up too causing the mercs to swap bodies while they were all sleeping, sniper was in medic's body, medic was in sniper's body, soldier was in engineer's body, scout was in heavy's body, engineer was in soldier's body, spy was in demoman' body, heavy was in scout's body, demo was in pyro's body and pyro was in spy's body.
The next morning scout woke up and he didn't feel like himself, he felt fatter and larger, he sat up and realised he wasn't in his room, he was in heavy's room and then he looked at his hands, they were massive and he got up to look in a mirror, he saw that he was heavy
"i'm the tough guy" he said "how did this happen?"
he was interrupted by the door opening and it was heavy as scout
"scout" heavy said looking at himself
"heavy" scout said looking at himself "how did this happen?"
"don't know, let's find engie" heavy said and both of them went to engie's room
when they got there, they knock on the door, it was open by soldier in engie's body
"hi maggots" soldier said
"soldier?! has it happened to you too" scout said
"yes and now in engie" soldier said
"why are you acting calm, you in someone else body" scout says
"meh, i've seen worse from marasmus" soldier says
heavy and scout look at each other and shrug it off
"is engie awake?" heavy asks
"yes he's just getting up now" soldier says looking at engie and back at scout and heavy
"what the..." engie said seeing himself at the door, he looks at his hands and realise he is soldier "how did this happen?"
"we don't know that why we came to see you" scout explained
"this is really weird" engie said and going over to soldier, heavy and scout "i wonder if this has happened to the others"
meanwhile medic was waking up and notice straight away that he wasn't in his body, he get up and goes over to a mirror to see that he is sniper, he put his hands on his face
"well this is interesting" he said with his hands checking his face out
he then hears sniper wake up, he watches as sniper sat up and when he saw himself standing at the mirror, he was really confused
"what's happening?" sniper said
"well sniper, it seems that i am you and you are me" medic said
sniper went over to the mirror and medic was right
"how'd this happen" sniper said
"i don't know but it's quite interesting" medic said putting his hands on his face again
"careful with my face" sniper said
"i will since i'm stuck with it" medic said
then there was a knock on the door and the door opened to see scout, heavy, soldier and engineer
"have you guys swapped bodies too?" scout asks
"yes scout" medic said
"doktor is sniper" heavy says
"yes i am and i kinda like it" medic said
"well we have to figure out how to change back again, medic and i will see what happened" engie said
medic and engie went to check it out
"careful with my body" sniper said
"i will" medic replies
and the others went downstairs to have breakfast, when they to to the kitchen everyone was still trying to get use to their bodies and it was quite strange to seeing one persons voice coming out of another persons body, as they were having breakfast spy came down
"gentlemen" spy said, everyone turns and see demo
"i'm guessing your spy" scout says
"yes i am" spy says "has anyone seen my body?"
everyone shook their heads
"i'll wait then" spy said and sits down
"so if spy got demos body" sniper says "i bet demo got pyros body and pyro got spy's body"
"maybe we get to finally hear what pyro sounds like" scout says
as scout says that pyro enters
"how it going laddies" demo says muffled
"hey demo" scout says
"can anyone tell me what happened" demo says sitting down next to spy "that's my body there"
"medic and engie have got to firgure it out" soldier says
"but in body case, it's sniper and soldier" scout says
"aye" demo says before passing out
"he hasn't even drank any scrumpy yet" spy says "and he's passed out"
"that's demo" sniper says
then spy appears
"oh hi pyro" scout says
pyro waved and sat down next to spy
"aren't you going to say anything?" scout asks
pyro shook his head and lied his head on the table, after breakfast and a wash everyone went to their room to put on their clothes but they had to put on their body's clothes, after getting dressed everyone went about their day but in different bodies
scout was to run but he kept getting tired to quickly so he kept taking time outs but then he remembered that heavy was strong so he went over to a bench and lifted it with ease, he was happy with this and lifted other stuff he couldn't lift before, soldier was trying to figure out how to put on engie's overalls but he managed to figure it out, he felt weird wearing googles on his face and a big yellow glove on his hand but he'll get used to it and he went on with his day, pyro was kinda used to spy's body but as its pyro, he made spy look a bit dumb while he was colouring in, demo didn't really like it that he had to use a straw to drink his scrumpy but he was drinking it and he was calm, heavy was surprised how fast could run, he could never run this fast in his body he he was enjoying the speed, engie and medic were still trying to figure out what happened but they are getting somewhere, engie felt weird having a large helmet over his eyes and he had to take it off so he can see but when he did he felt naked without it on and it kept coming back to him when he tried to ignore it so he ended up putting it back on again but he put up so he can see, medic felt strange at first have a left glove and watch on his left hand and a hat on on but he got use to it after he got to work, spy felt off only having his right eye and not being able to smoke but he really like the taste of his drinks so he kept drinking and drinking, sniper decided to have a nap outside his camper van, he grabbed his decchair and lied in it before remembering he was in medic's body, he didn't mind it but it just felt weird to him so he shrugged it off and went to sleep
A while later medic and engineer figured out the problem, the respawn machine and engie's teleported went glitchie and it caused the body swap, they managed to fix it and all they needed to do was flick a switch to swap everyone back to normal but they decided to leave it for a bit to try out their new bodies, medic went to his infirmary to do something and when he got there archimedes cooed at him
"hi archimedes, it me medic" medic said but this made archimedes confused, he tilted his head then flew off
he went to his desk and all of a sudden he felt sleepy, he then remembered that sniper like to take naps so he lied back in his chair, put his legs on the table and he was about to fall alsleep until he heard the door open, he looked over and saw sniper standing there
"looks like my body is making you sleepy" sniper said
"yeah i did remember you like to sleep a lot" medic said
"yeah but that can't be the same for you" sniper says "i tried to sleep but you rarely take naps so i wasn't that sleepy"
archimedes then came swooping down and lands on snipers shoulder
"i think archimedes is confused by the body swap thing" medic said tired
"you get some rest doc, my body will need it when we swap back" sniper says
"...ok" medic said and lied back, sniper went over and grabs his hat and puts it over medic's eyes. medic closed his eyes and he was asleep
sniper tried to firgure out what to do, he never been up all day before so he didn't really know what to do, he then remembered that medic like to spend the day with his birds so he made archimedes jump on his finger and stroked him, archimedes seem to like this and he wanted more, sniper put his finger on archimedes' chest and archimedes loved it, he coped in happiness and this made sniper smile, sniper lied down on the thing that medic does his operation on and he petted archimedes, one by one all of medic doves came over to sniper and and lied down around him, all the doves were happy about getting the attention and after a while all the doves and sniper fell asleep, medic woke up an hour later, he lifted up the hat and saw that all the doves and sniper were asleep on the operating table, medic smiled and decided to flick the switch on the teleporter, he went to engie's workshop and flick the switch and after some magic everyone was back in there bodies again but when medic and sniper swapped bodies, sniper collapsed on the floor since he was still asleep, sniper didn't wake up till a while later on the floor of engie's workshop
"medic must of flicked the switch as i was asleep" sniper though, he got up and went to medic, when he got there, he saw that medic was awake and doing his paperwork
"i see that your awake" medic said
"yeah but why did you flick the switch while i was asleep?" sniper asks
"cause i was awake" medic said
"well at least i'm in my own body again" sniper said
"yeah" medic said looking at his glove
sniper left the room, medic smiled as sniper left and went back to his paperwork, all the other mercs kinda missed being in the others body but they are glad they are back to normal again
the end