Aespa Oneshots

(WinRina) Cowards

Karina stared at her, she sat down and breathed deeply

"Winter... I love you... I love you very very much"Karina confesses, it had been 5 years since she started having feelings for the girl, at first she thought it was a friendly feeling of just being attached to Winter but as more minutes, hours, days and months went by she realised that she wanted something more than friendship

She had tried to confess countless of times but it didn't seem to go through Winter as her replies would always be "Aww I love you too unnie, we've been bestfriends for awhile now and it's still really nice to hear you say that" to which Karina awkwardly laughs as a reply, quite embarrassed of how many times it had already happened but she couldn't find the courage to tell her straightforward as she feared that she'd lose what they already had but now it was different... She had made up her mind

"Winter... I love you... Not as a friend... Not as a bestfriend... Not as a sister... I love you Winter... In a way that I can't bear to see you be in love with someone else... I want to be the apple of your eye, I want you to love me like how I love you... Romantically Winter, not as typical friends..."Karina confesses and she lets her tears burst as she glances at the girl once more

"You're so unfair... I didn't even get the chance to tell you all of this... Why'd yiu leave me behind?"Karina says in between her sobs as she places her hand over the glass of the casket

"Winter... I didn't get to tell you how I truly felt... I wanted to tell you all of that... I wanted to hear your response even if it was acceptance or rejection because... I'm deeply in love with you..."Karina whispers as she gets up from her seat to properly look at Winter's body inside the death bed

"You still look so pretty... I wanted to protect that beauty of yours... I wanted to protect your innocence... I wanted to protect your smiles... I wanted to protect everything about you... I wanted to protect you but you didn't let me... Winter... I saw your will that you left for me... I read the diary you left for me... Why didn't you tell me?"Karina asks as she wails on the casket

"Why!? Why didn't you tell me!? Why didn't you tell me that you felt the same way?! Winter... I would've loved you with all that I had... I would've given you everything, I would've given you the world if you'd have told me..."Karina exclaims, she leans her forehead against the glass of the casket

"I could've saved you from what you felt... I could've prevented this... I could have stopped you from taking your own life if you'd just tell me..."Karina's legs gave up and she ended up falling onto the floor, she hugs her knees as her tears kept falling

"Winter... You and I... We're both the same... Maybe that's why we fell for each other... But I'm not happy... Because you left me before we even had a chance... I know I was a coward for not telling you how I felt... But why did you have to end it all? We were in the same page but why did you give up? We're both cowards Winter... But the only difference is that you gave up... While I tried to gain courage... Thank you for being a part of my life Winter... You don't have to wait anymore... I'll join you soon and then maybe... We can finally tell each other how we truly feel... Winter, Let's not be cowards anymore"

(A/N: I'm sorry for the extremely angsty oneshots these days, I only wrote these to let off some of the emotions I've been feeling as it's the only choice for me... I've tried another coping mechanism before but I quit that because it feels wasteful and it makes me feel even worse, I say it's wasteful because there's still so much more that I want to do and it'd be a waste to end all my misery and give up just like that, I want to fight even if it's painful. I want to grow more as a person and I want to see what the future has for me, so bear with me please)