Logan's Version

LV 3 [a lockdown comedy] (scene 4) - Walk like Armanie

The scene opens with Armanie and Nigel walking into Denver's Reel Time while discussing simultaneously. There are different people in the waiting room.
Nigel: Remember, we can't screw this up. We need to prove he has a diabolical reason to fire Logan. Just so we're clear, Mr George's personal assistant, Simran Khanna, thinks she runs this place.
Armanie: (smirks cheekily) Is it because her name is Simrun? [laugh track]
Simran: (runs in and begins to shout hysterically) Places for last-minute auditions, people!! WE ARE RUNNING OUT OF TIME!! (Simran runs off)
Armanie: (realizes) Oh, she literally runs this place [laugh track]. Besides, who are the judges of the audition?

[Flashforward...]
The auditions have started, and while a brunette lady is performing hers, Armanie and Nigel notice that George, a 30 something year old lady, whose name is revealed to be Tara, and not very surprisingly, Kelsea, are the judges.
Armanie: Your little sister is a judge? Isn't that how child careers are ruined? [brief laugh track]
Nigel: Believe me, I'm disappointed [laugh track].
George: Armanie Ruiz? Please, come forward.
Armanie: (to himself as he walks toward the casting judges) You can do this.
Kelsea: Hello, Mr Armanie. Tell us a bit about yourself.
Armanie: I am Armanie Ruiz. I'm from a family of 7. I, Abuela, mom, dad, and 3 siblings, Camillo, Esmerelda, and Giorgio.
Tara: OK, we need a character that gives sassy, not saucy talk [laugh track]. What will you act as?
Armanie: I could play the role of a walking dead. I know that cause some people are sick and dead of their daily jobs [laugh track].
(Meanwhile, as Nigel observes Armanie performing an awful zombie cosplay, Jesse walks up to him with a bowl of popcorn)
Jesse: Mr Nigel, do you want some?
Nigel: Sure, Jesse. (He proceeds to collect some popcorn from Jesse's bowl, but Jesse puts the last popcorn in his mouth. He realizes it's empty and smiles nervously)
Jesse: My bad. Ms. Simran was in a hurry to eat them again [laugh track].
Nigel: (shrugs) Fair enough. (He watches Armanie for a while before proceeding to ask) Oh, and Jesse, did you - (He turns around and realizes Jesse is not standing beside him. He palms his face and groans) Jesse realizes his visions don't give him the ability to mess with our literal visions, right?
Kelsea: (out of nowhere) I tell him that all the time [laugh track].
Nigel: (startled) What in the - (He looks at Kelsea's seat and sees that it's empty. He glares at Kelsea)
Kelsea: Blame Jesse. I live with him, remember? [laugh track] (She walks away, while Nigel continues to observe Armanie's performance)
Armanie: (acting like a mechanic robot in front of George and Tara) And I want those, those broken, those broken (he suddenly starts dancing) Those broken bits of biscuits, ayy, ayy [laugh track].
Rita: (she looks visibly frustrated, but she has had enough) I can't take this anymore! Will you shut it out if we give you the role?!
Armanie: (stops dancing and smiles victoriously) Yes!
George/Rita: (relieved) Finally!
Armanie: (He leaves the two and goes to meet Nigel at the doorway. He smirks victoriously) I told you I'll win [laugh track]
Nigel: Armanie, is everything and everywhere set?
Armanie: I got Camillo to set cameras all over the place. The halls, the restrooms, the movie sets. And they all work. (Nigel opens his mouth to say something, but Armanie cuts him short) And don't move like that ever again. You're not Logan [laugh track].

Meanwhile, Tracy is talking with Logan and George at the reception office.
Tracy: (to Simran) And that's how Jesse and Logan got stuck on the ferris wheel. You need to see Logan begging for mercy. (Simran laughs at the statement, while Logan glares at Tracy) [laugh track]
Logan: Tracy, we've been over this. You can't just start a story from the middle. We just got here [laugh track]. (Just then, George walks to the three with a stern look on his face)
George: William. I need to see you in my office.
Logan: Am I finally getting a raise? You know it's not easy juggling two jobs. (shrugs) Tracy can't relate.
Tracy: And you can't relate to being sensible like me
Simran: Man, that burn needs a thermometer [laugh track].
George: I'll be waiting. (George leaves them to stare for a while)
Simran: Whenever George says "waiting" instead of "expecting," then you're in a lot of trouble.
Logan: (exchanges worried glances with Tracy) It can't be that bad...

Later, at George's office...
George: (in a slightly baritone voice) Logan, you have been a very bad boy lately.
Logan: (grimaces) Mr George, you're too old for that [laugh track].
George: (raises his phone up) Sorry, been working on the perfect accent for the finale. Also, I'm in my 40s [laugh track]. Anyway, I've got an offer for you. If you want to keep this job, you have to accept the offer. No one has to know about it.
Logan: (widens his eyes) And what is the offer? And can I tell Tracy?
George: Tracy doesn't need to know (he does a slight smirk that makes Logan uncomfortable)
Logan: (stutters) I have, I have to go. And not because Jesse needs me.
George: (stands up) To hell with your Jesse!
Logan: (stands from the chair) Watch it, Mr Restroom! You better keep my baby's name out of your mouth, or I will send you to hell, you ungrateful, desperate, and disgusting monster! [gasp track] And unlike Rihanna, we can not be friends [laugh track].
George: Oh, William. You're fired [laugh track]
Logan: Because I refused to accept your weirdly dirty offer?
George: Yes. And you said I'm old in my 40s.
Logan: (shrugs nonchalantly) Yes. And I'm not taking back what I said. Just so we're clear, you're the only 40 year old I know, who looks older than 40 [brief laugh track]. (He leaves George's office annoyed and returns back to Tracy)
Tracy: Logan, please tell me he's raising our salaries. (they start to walk out of the building) Especially yours, you work way too hard for that horse shoe [laugh track].
Logan: (smiles dimly) Hey, you care about me.
Tracy: Yeah, so you can pay me as your manager.
Logan: Which you forget you are! [laugh track] And by the way, paying you will be impossible. Because now, I don't have a job anymore [gasp track]. (Tracy stares at Logan in utter surprise)
Tracy: But why? I mean, we know he always wanted to fire you, but why?
Logan: (gives Tracy a raised eyebrow and a sad expression. She quickly reads it) You see why. And I've always said no, but he never listens. (Nigel and Armanie walk towards the two) Hey, guys. (Before he can say anything, the two hug both Tracy and Logan) OK, we'll hug first [laugh track]
Nigel: We saw everything.
Armanie: And if you want, I can -
Logan: No, it's fine. We don't need the police. He's going to twist the whole thing anyway.
Tracy: Maybe we could talk to him tomorrow. (shrugs) I mean, Armanie has the role now, and it will be easy to meet George. (Jesse and Kelsea walk out of the DRT building. Logan and Jesse's eyes temporarily meet, the former having a worn-out facial expression)
Logan: If it doesn't work out, I'll find a way to make it work. I got a kid now.
Armanie/Nigel/Tracy: (groans in unison) God, please. [laugh track] (Logan raises an eyebrow at the three)
Armanie: Neil was right about the melodrama.
Tracy: (rolls her eyes) Logan, you still have your guardian babysitting job. Don't blow it! [laugh track] (Jesse and Kelsea join the adults, and they walk toward the car as the scene ends).