Logan's Version

LV 4 (scene 11) - Just say thank "me"

Tracy is shown staring towards something at the ceiling in Logan's, concern written all over her face. It is unknown what she's looking at.
Tracy: I know you volunteered to help me out for Thanksgiving. The cooking and the cleaning, I'm literally thankful for it. But what are you doing? (Danny is seen on a high chair, mopping the ceiling) [laugh track]
Danny: Miss Tracy, this is also a house chore, you know. We do it at home, too, and it helps to keep the ceiling squeaky clean.
Tracy: Danny, it's Thanksgiving. I'm not in the mood of lies today.
Danny: I didn't lie about anything today.
Tracy: Yeah, sure. House chores? Or you let the tomato juice splash all over the ceiling? (The stains are finally revealed as Danny stops mopping. He groans in frustration and comes down) [laugh track]
Tracy: I'll do the main cooking. Besides, how's Jesse not here by now?
Jesse: (runs in suddenly, breathing heavily) Miss Tracy?! You have to cook by yourself! (He looks at the stained ceiling and then at Danny, who's still holding the bloodied mop strands). [laugh track] Shoot, I came late. (shrugs) At least, he did not almost burn the kitchen again.
Danny: That reminds me. How long do you keep turkey in an oven?
Tracy/Jesse: (exchange terrified glances at each other) DANIEL?! [heavy laugh track] (The two rush to get hand mittens and proceed to turn off the oven and bring out the turkey and drop on a large tray on the table, while Danny stares at them clueless).
Jesse: Hopefully, Danny is the only drama to deal with for today. (He freezes in a trance, and the camera closes in on his glowing right eye, followed by the speeding green wave of light. The vision opens with Logan and Harleen with a blue hoodie. In the background, are people piled up as though they were a stack of cards)
[Logan: We finally got the hoodie we've been checking out for weeks now]
(The vision quickly closes, and the green wave is shown, followed by Jesse's eye and his full face. Jesse regains consciousness and just exhales)
Jesse: What am I saying? It's Logan's Version [laugh track]. (He shrugs and continues helping Tracy)...

Later that evening...
Logan, Tracy, Mario, Frederick, Phoebe, and Eleanor are seated at the dining table with different delicacies, ranging from salads to chicken soup bowls to ramen to rice and finally the turkey in the centre of it all. The six of them are shown praying before eating.
Logan: And as we eat this food, let it nourish our bodies.
Everyone: Amen.
Phoebe: (brings out a fork from nowhere) Now let's stuff our faces with turkey meat! [laugh track] (Everyone is stunned at her outburst)
Tracy: Phoebe, how do you keep starring in reality shows, romcoms, and thrillers? You need to consider horror.
Frederick: You kinda have the looks for it. For one thing, the Chucky series is on air, and they're hiring. (Phoebe shoots Frederick a deathly glare) [laugh track]
Phoebe: You naughty -
Tracy: OK, let's calm down. We just finished praying.
Logan: (staring at his phone in a worried manner) Tracy, I just found out that the hoodies we've been pricing for months are finally up for sale.
Tracy: Son of a Hilson! [brief laugh track]
Mario: Well, Black Friday is tomorrow. We can rush to the mall and see what's in store for us. Oh, now that I hear it, I better save my dark humour for tomorrow's Black Friday. (chuckles) Mall? In store? So comical.
Logan: Wow, he thinks he's funny.
Eleanor: Does it remind you of anyone? [laugh track]
Frederick: Can we all just start being thankful for something that doesn't involve shading ourselves? (pauses) I'm thankful that I'm finally getting my big break after debuting three years ago.
Tracy: I'm thankful that I'm doing something useful with my life after the last few jobs I've had. I used to dance too.
Logan: I also did a dance while acting, too, though I wasn't exactly good at it.
Phoebe: (to Logan and Tracy) Really? What type of dance? Ballroom? Ballet? Hip Hop? Lap? (Everyone turns to look at her, with mouths wide open in shock) [gasp track] [laugh track]
Mario: (sipping his drink and whispering to Eleanor) Too bad we aren't on air right now [heavy laugh track]

The next day...
Logan, Tracy, Mario, and Phoebe are shopping at a random mall. They run into Simran and Harleen at the chocolate aisle.
Harleen: (sweetly) Good Thanksgiving to you, Mr Logan, Miss Tracy. The others?
Mario: I'm Mario.
Phoebe: And I'm Phoebe Myers. Not Thunderman. Some people think I look like her.
Simran: (in mock confusion) Which people? [laugh track]
Harleen: Well, no one thinks you're related to Mario Lopez. (to Simran) Aunt Simran, I'll go check the next aisle for some oranges (Harleen leaves the adults)
Mario: Besides, we decided to do what adults in their early 30s do every time on this special day. Shop and complain [brief laugh track]
Logan: Correction, I'm not in my 30s yet.
Simran: Oh, yeah, we forgot you're the baby of the group. Also, you're adopted.
Logan: (pouts and talks in a child-like tone) I'm telling mom [laugh track]. (Logan looks in a particular direction and freezes in surprise. Tracy notices his sudden silence and walks towards him slowly)
Tracy: Logan, if I find out Jesse's visions have been contagious all this while, then you gon' get it! [laugh track] (He points discreetly at two hoodies hanged on a separate stand away from the others, with a sign by the side "60% off." One is orange, and the other one is blue)
Logan: (whispering) The hoodies. They're just like I remember. Orange is mine, blue is yours.
Tracy: (replying back) How do we beat them to it? Mario and Phoebe?
Logan: (smirks dramatically) Watch, learn, and follow my lead.
Tracy: Logan, we both know we don't like making your mistakes with you. (Logan ignores her and stealthily walks towards the hoodies. Tracy notices Simran is still talking to Mario and Phoebe, so she follows Logan. The two quickly put the hoodies in their shopping carts and proceed to leave)
Logan: The mission is a success. (The two turn around to see Harleen glaring at them)
Tracy: (scoffs) Until children came along [laugh track].
Harleen: Aunt Simran was going to get those for me and Ruddy as Thanksgiving gifts.
Logan: I'm getting these for myself and Jesse.
Tracy: (unimpressed) Wow. What a way to throw me under the bus.
Simran: (joins in) Why are you trying to take put hoodies?!
Mario: (suddenly walks towards them with Phoebe) You mean our hoodies?!
Harleen: I'll take that (snatches the hoodies and walks away, but Logan takes the orange one from him)
Logan: If you weren't Jesse's friend,I'd have knocked you down. That and you're Simran's niece and a child, so she'll kill me anyway
Simran: That's where you're wrong, Hilliam
Logan: (appalled) Oh my God. Simran? You'd wound your niece for a hoodie? Tragic! [laugh track]
Simran: Dummy. (She snatches the hoodies back and puts it back in her trolley, but Mario takes the blue one without her noticing. Tracy puts her left foot forward so Mario trips. He lets go of the hoodies, which Logan catches, and he dashes forward towards the payment line. Harleen chases after Logan, while Mario, Phoebe, and Simran literally fight over the orange hoodie. Tracy goes to join Logan as he struggles with Harleen over the blue hoodie. All six of them are fighting over the sale hoodies in front of everyone. Some are videoing them or just staring in resentment or shock) [laugh track].
Logan: (struggles) Why won't you let go?! It's obvious for Jesse!
Tracy: Stop (exhales) lying to the girl! (Simran, Phoebe, and Mario run past them, still fighting over the hoodie)
Harleen: (loosens her grip) It's for Jesse?!
Logan: (grabs it firmly and sneers) Ha! If you love him, let him go! (Logan and Tracy proceed to triumphantly pay for it, but they both slip and fall on another customer, who falls on another, who falls on a nearby candy stand, which falls on the floor. A middle-aged lady slips on one chocolate bar on the floor and falls on another lady. Everyone starts to fall like heaps of domino cards, much to the shock of the cashiers and the security men who try to contain the commotion. Simran, Mario, and Phoebe are not left out of the fall) [laugh track]
Harleen: (smirks) If you love them, don't let them go scot-free [brief laugh track]. (She takes the hoodie back from Logan and Tracy. She searches for Simran amongst the tired crowd) Aunt Simran?
Logan: (quickly stands up) Girl. Think again.
Tracy: (exhausted) Logan, how did you do that?
Logan: (shrugs) I'm 26. What did you expect? [brief laugh track] (His and Harleen's eyes meet Simran and Phoebe, having a crazy cat fight over the hoodie. Two security men are trying to separate the women) You have got to be kidding me
Harleen: This is why I never take her shopping [laugh track]
Tracy: (also stands up) Well, Happy Black Friday to everyone in the store who is safe and healthy. (Everyone groans in agony at the irony of the statement) [laugh track]
Mario: Speak for yourself! I think I broke my hip. What am I going to use next week? [another laugh track]
Harleen: Great. It's the hardware store incident all over again. (Just then, Jesse and Gerald walk in and notice the ruckus and the pile of people on the floor, either struggling to stand up or just groaning. Tracy helps Mario up)
Jesse: I didn't know the craziness was that, well, crazy.
Gerald: What could have caused it? (Logan and Harleen walk towards them, holding the blue hoodie)
Logan: (flaunting) We finally got the hoodie we've been checking out for weeks now.
Jesse: (to himself) And there is the reason for my vision [laugh track].
Logan: A simple "thank you" would be nice, but what do I know? I'm the underpaid teacher (The alarm suddenly goes off. Logan hasn't paid for the hoodie and walked all the way to the entrance without realising it) Oh, no. I forgot to pay.
Jesse: (to Harleen) This is why I never take him shopping.
Harleen: You think? (She points at Simran and Phoebe hissing at each other in cat-like manners, much to their surprise. [laugh track] Tracy and Mario join them to stare, all exhaling in sheer exhaustion. The security men approach Logan and mention he hasn't paid for the hoodie. He drops a random wad of cash and smiles sheepishly)
Logan: I'm famous. Keep the change. Happy Thanksgiving. (in an eerily deep voice) RUN! (They all make a run for it out of the store, including Gerald and Jesse, who have no idea why they're running, leaving Simran and Phoebe talking with the manager. The women are unaware they've been abandoned) [final laugh track]