Surviving Heartbreak

What Remains

A year later...

I still remember everything about you.
I remember your coffee order, your favourite ice cream,
Your morning routine, the sound of your alarm,
Which side of the bed you preffered and why.

I remember your birthday, your name day,
Your sister's birthday, her name day--
Even your dogs' names linger in my mind.
I remember why you wore only black and white clothing
And I still know your closet by heart.

None of this bothers me anymore,
But I also remember how you held me
When I needed you the most,
How you'd sit with me on the couch,
Watching shows and movies that probably neither one of us liked,
But we did it to spend time with each other.
I remember your smile, and how I was once the reason for it,
Your laugh, God that laugh.
Your cologne, the fresh scent after your shower.

I remember the beat of your heart,
And how it steadied when my head rested on your chest.

They say heartbreak fades in a year,
And mostly, it does.
But sometimes, on a random Tuesday,
Or a Wednesday, or a Friday,
I hear a phrase you used to say,
Or I do something that we talked about doing together.

Or I catch a whiff of your cologne in the street,
And for a moment, knowing damn well it isn't you
I turn, hoping it is.
Then it hurts, and it all comes crashing back.

But you see, now I hold back my tears.
I don't cry; I smile instead,
Knowing you'd be proud of who I've become.
And hoping that when you remember me,
You smile as well.

Yes, remembering you still stings sometimes,
But I wouldn't have it any other way.
It's proof we once loved each other.
So, I'll keep these memories close,

Because even if I tried,
I don't think I could ever forget you anyway.

-MistakenGenius