Lookism: What Am I Even Doing?

Chapter 81

(Ila's POV)

There was a piece of rib piercing the bottom of my lung which explained why I had coughed up blood before my shift this evening. The car accident had fractured one of my ribs and I was supposed to have been resting and icing it properly. This new doctor they brought in seemed more professional than the last as he explained everything to me properly.

He sat down next to me in the infirmary as he showed me X-rays along with my before and after surgery pictures. I would've been fine, he said, had I not started working out or sleeping regularly. During my intense workouts I was putting unnecessary stress on my healing rib causing the bone to crack again. And laying down flat on my back didn't allow it to settle.

So when Jong-su hit me as hard as he did, that cracked bone completely chipped off and shot straight into my left lung. When he told me all of this he seemed surprised that I had even kept going despite the pain. Normal people would've noticed something wrong with their bodies and would've consulted a doctor.

How could I tell him that I always seemed to be in some sort of pain these days. I may or may have not noticed the pain in my chest during my workouts. Whether or not I chose to acknowledge it as something serious was completely on me. Right now what was pissing me off was that I still didn't know the complete reason why that motherfucker had gotten mad at me.

Seo-ah didn't tell me as she consulted with the doctor if it was alright to take my medications.

Haruki or Richard didn't mention much as they visited me before work earlier this evening.

Jong-su didn't show his ugly mug to hit me again which was good I guess.

And there's no way in hell I want Chin-hae here.

"Can you change the channel?"

Other Me settled in the chair next to the bed. She was careful not to scoot the chair too close so that it would mess with any of my wires. There's something strange that I've noticed. When I take my medication Eun is the only person that leaves me unless I'm really stressed. Other Me always seems to stick around though. Whether it be in the back of my head or like this, as tired as she looked.

"You're not a fan of comedy?"

"Change the channel."

Right now we are watching Running Man. It was a Korean variety show that started a couple years ago. What I like about it is that it's a very active variety show where teams compete against each other. To be honest it's more of a competition show that just happens to be hilarious. I didn't see anything wrong with watching it but I wasn't in the mood to argue with myself.

"What do you want to watch then?"

"Are there any cartoons on?"

"Cartoons? I guess I can check." Other Me settled back into the chair as I scrolled through the Tv guide, "Hero Man just ended but Pororo's on."

She shook her head, "I want something American."

"American? I don't know if they have any American channels."

"Figure it out."

Damn, shit. Does a little please really hurt that much to say? Getting on my fucking nerves. I mumbled a curse at her then went to Newtube where I quite literally googled "Full Episodes of American Cartoons." Genius, I know. As I scrolled through the options she leaned forward and pointed excitedly at the screen.

"That one! I want that one!"

I looked at her. It's not that I minded watching LooneyToons but it's the way she said it. For a moment, I just watched her as I pressed play. Her body language turned from defensive to comfortable as her eyes softened. She pulled her knees up to her chest and hugged herself as she watched the Tv.