Ready? Not Really.. (Fem USUK) •IN EDITING•

Alice

A/N
Why do so many people like this wtf
I wrote it when I was depressed and sleep deprived guys pls calm down
#notevenreallyinthefandomanymore
Uhh.. Here's an update???
(I'm trying to get back into the swing of writing so I guess this'll be like my warmup lol)
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"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" I chanted as I ran out the building.
Ok, mental note: don't use the microwave after sleeping for just an hour the previous night because you might just accidentally microwave aluminium foil. Again. It was an accident, okay!
I ran out in the hallway after my microwave exploded into flames (and possibly burned my eyebrows off) and pulled the fire alarm. Within seconds, the hallway was filled with people. I tried to get lost in the crowd so no one would know I started the fire, but a few people glared at me despite my efforts. Damn it. There's no way I'd ever live this down.
A back suddenly slammed into my face, and I fell backwards. "God, fucking-" I looked up and immediately my stomach rolled in anger.
"Watch where you're going, crétin," that stupid French exchange student, Francine, said, raising an eyebrow at me. Her hair tumbled down her shoulder in curly knots, and a nightgown fell loosely off of her shoulders. Must've just woken up. And yet she still looked prettier than me.
Uh.
I mean.. asshole.
"You were walking too slow, you prat!"
"Well I was sleeping, and then you decided to catch your dorm on fire." She smiled sweetly at me. My stomach turned at the fact that she could read me like a book, and I sneered back to try to act like it didn't phase me. "What were you doing? Eating cereal?"
"You have absolutely no proof that it was my-" A burst of flames shot out of my door, and I sighed. "Room."
A few girls started screaming and ran away from my room. I pressed against the wall to escape the stampede. Francine unfortunately decided to stand next to me. "Were you daydreaming about your precious Amelia and forgot how to pour milk into the bowl?"
My face turned red. I didn't bother denying it since I had told Francine firsthand about my.. crush, for lack of a more proper term. I was drunk, alright? It was the liquor that had decided to blurt out my embarrassing secret. "No, I was daydreaming about how I'm totally fucked because I forgot to do my essay for advanced literature."
Francine smiled more. "I'm sure you wish you were 'totally fucked' by something else- or shall I say, someone else instead, non?"
I glared at her.
"Oh my god, are you guys alright?!"
Francine's eyes lit up. "Ah, Madeline!" She grabbed Maddie by the shoulders and kissed her on both of her cheeks. (Not like it was weird... They did that a lot.. maybe an inside joke?) Maddie hugged her quickly before turning to me.
"What happened?"
I frowned. "Why does everyone think I'm the one that started the fire?"
Maddie's eyes grew huge. "You started a fire?"
I rolled my eyes. "It was an accident.."
Francine shook her head. "As fun as it is to talk in the middle of a crowded hallway, I really think we should go before Alice's cooking actually kills us." She slung her arms around me and Maddie's shoulders, much to my dismay.
"Get your disgusting hands off of me!"
"Alice!" I whipped my head around at the sound of my name. My eyes immediately went huge.
"Am..Amelia?"
"Ali, you alright?" The dirty blonde stopped in front of me. She looked crazy, a wild look in her eyes and her hair sticking up in more places than usual. She somehow still managed to be absolutely stunning even with her batman onesie. "I heard you yell so I thought someone was attacking.." Her voice trailed off when she looked at Francine and she frowned. "Ohhh."
"Bonjour." The idiot actually had the audacity to smile like she wasn't being an asshole two seconds earlier.
Amelia tilted her head. "Hey, uh.." she snapped her fingers a few times. "F.. Fl..?"
"Francine."
"Franny! 'Course! I could never forget you!"
Francine sighed and rubbed her face. "We have known each other for years and yet you still forget my name.."
Amelia smiled apologetically and shrugged. "Well, I mean, it's hard not to when Alice always calls you 'moron' or 'frog' or 'bitch-'"
"Alright, thank you Amelia!" I interrupted before she could find something stupider to say. I wriggled out of Francine's grasp and turned to the Frenchie. "As wonderful as it is to talk to you, I really must be going." Before she could say anything, I waved and dragged Amelia away. She was spending too much time looking at the amount of skin Fran was showing for my liking. Maddie waved after us with a goofy smile before she turned and started talking to her foreign friend again.
"Dude!"
"Hush! I'm saving you!"
"I'm supposed to be the one that does the saving!"
Ah yes. How could I forget the hero complex she had. "I hardly need you to save me!"
"Well, you sure do seem like you need me," she breathed.
"Excuse me?" I let go of her wrist, but before I could say anything else she leapt out of my reach and ran out the doors.
"See ya later, Allygator!"
"What the hell were you tal-"
The timing was never more perfect for the sprinklers to kick on and completely drench me.
Thanks, world.