Ready? Not Really.. (Fem USUK) •IN EDITING•

Alice

a/n
writing in school like a rebel wowee
thanks for your comments guys! :D y'all rock. hope you're ready for a roller coaster of feelings haha
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I sat frozen in place.
What do I do?
I didn't-
I couldn't-
What?
It wasn't like she was even a good kisser. Amelia actually sucked at it, to be quite honest. Our "kiss" was nothing more than her gentle pressure on my lips. I don't think she'd ever dated anyone for more than a few months, so she probably never had time to practice.
But damn it all if I wasn't enjoying every single second of this.
Her lips were really warm and full, and she was definitely wearing lip gloss. They made her lips taste like cherries. I wanted more of her, more of this.
She put her hand on my knee, and I shivered.
More, more, more.
This was wrong. Everything about this whole situation we had thrown ourselves in all those years ago. All wrong.
No! It was right!
Right?
I didn't know what she was thinking. Amelia was straight! As in, boys only! What the hell was she doing?
Actually.. I don't think she even knew what she was doing.
It was over all too soon. She broke away with a loud gasp for air. Her glasses had gone completely askew on her face, and her eyes were huge.
"I.." she started. "I don't know what got into me, oh my god." Amelia looked terrified. Her cheeks flushed red. "I'm so sorry, holy shit, Alice, I am so, so sorry."
I just ignored everything she said and, instead, decided to just fuck it all and take a risk. A small risk, but it still scared the hell out of me.
I reached forward to flick a few loose strands of hair out of her face. My hand lingered on her cheek. Amelia's face was so warm. She blinked a few times in confusion, as if she had expected me to blow up on her.
"It's okay," I said bluntly.
She frowned. It was freaky how close to her I still was. I could actually see where her eyelashes clumped together and where she had forgotten to blend in her makeup. "Yeah?"
"Uh huh."
"'Kay."
"Right."
Amelia tugged at the bottom of her shirt.
I bit my bottom lip.
"I don't know what to do," she admitted quietly.
I just shrugged and shook my head dumbly. "Neither do I."
Amelia hesitated before she held my hand in hers.
What was I supposed to do?
Forget it. Who cared what the hell I did.
I leaned forward and pressed a kiss on her cheek, closing my eyes so I didn't have to see her reaction. She sighed softly and held my hand tighter. I think she might've smiled. Her cheek moved a little under my lips.
"Your eyelashes tickle," she giggled.
I smiled and backed away from her. At that moment, I was so glad I had never fallen in love with anyone else. "You're a dork."
"Okay."
"Yeah."
She squeezed my hand, and we just grinned at each other like two morons.
Two morons hopelessly trying to find love.
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No one bothered us for the longest time.
Amelia had actually attempted to try and teach me whatever we had been talking about before, but she kept trailing off to look at me and would immediately forget where she had left off. I loved the attention. So much waiting and now I had her right here with me. She hadn't said why she'd kissed me, but I could tell she was thinking about it. Her eyes kept drifting down to my lips and then back to my eyes.
Our legs were pressed together, and her ankle was hooked around mine. I wished more than just our sides were touching, but I don't think she would react well to me making another move on her.
"What was I saying?" she asked every time she snapped into reality.
"Something about how you really should have showered before tutoring me because you smell like a foot?" I tilted my head and smiled.
Amelia laughed and shoved me. "Shut up! Seriously, do I smell?"
"No." She relaxed. "At least, not too much." She glared at me, but I could see her eyes dancing.
"Jerk."
"I think you were on page.. whatever."
"Page whatever?"
I rolled my eyes. "You're the one that's supposed to be helping me. Figure it out, tutor."
Amelia sighed in exasperation and looked down at the page. She flipped through the book while I just stared at her.
Oh, Amelia.
My Amelia.
Well... hopefully.
We hadn't actually established anything, which probably wasn't very good for a relationship.
Relationship with Amelia..
I smiled.
"What's got you so happy?" she asked, interrupting my thoughts.
I shrugged. "Maybe I just really like math."
Amelia snorted and shook her head. "Okay then. Sure." She finally found where she had stopped. "Okay, so we were on example three." Without a single warning, she took my hand and set it on top of one of the problems. "This one is pretty easy. What's the integral of this sin?"
I raised my eyebrows. "I don't know. Everything is in letters."
"Of course it's in letters, it's fucking calculus. That's what makes it hell for us students."
I rolled my eyes. "I'm so glad my tutor thinks that."
She sighed and closed the book. "You know what? Screw tutoring. This is boring as fuck." I watched as she tossed my textbook onto the ground. "I think since we both agree on being better friends-" my stomach twinged at the word. "-then we should do friend bonding shit."
"Like what? Going back and forth like twenty questions?" I scoffed. "Would you like to know my favourite colour while you're at it?"
"Yes!" she snapped. I jumped. "I want to know everything about you! What you like, what you hate, your friends, your favourite bands, and, yeah, your favourite fucking colour, Alice. Tell me what it is right now."
I frowned. "I don't know."
Amelia looked unimpressed. "Everybody has a favourite colour."
I sighed and thought for a brief moment. "Blue. I like blue." Like your eyes.
"Perfect. I like green." Her gaze lingered on my eyes for a second longer than it should have before she looked away. "Look how much we know now."
"It's astounding," I said sarcastically.
"It's a start, alright?"Amelia said. She shook her head and flopped onto her back. "You can be so difficult."
I frowned. "I'm not difficult! I'm just not entertained by talking about meaningless things about myself." I laid on my side next to her. Amelia looked at me again. "I don't think any of this really matters to anyone."
"It matters to me," she said quietly. "You like blue. That's one more thing I know about you. It might take a while, but you'll open up soon enough, Alice Kirkland."
I played with a piece of her hair. "If you insist."
She leaned her cheek into the palm of my hand. "I do insist. I'll do it." Amelia closed her eyes. "You watch me succeed, Brit."
I couldn't help but smile. "Alright, Yankee."
And apparently I accidentally fell asleep like that right next to her, because an hour later, I woke up to a blanket covering me and a new text message lighting up my phone screen.
Amelia: get some sleep, okay?