Ready? Not Really.. (Fem USUK) •IN EDITING•

Amelia

a/n
the nostalgic feeling of listening to music you used to love in, like, fifth grade
it's actually pretty good writing music. small me had good taste
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When Maddie and I were little, everyone always thought I was the older twin.
Sure, we were only a few minutes apart, but to us, that was everything. Most siblings could use the whole "I'm older than you! You have to listen to me!" thing in an argument, but I mean...
Hard to do when you were twins.
People usually thought I was the older sister, maybe even a different age, just because I was bigger than Maddie. Like, vertically and horizontally bigger. Even my parents used to joke about it all the time. "I'm pretty sure you took all of her nutrients in the womb," my mom told me one time. "And as soon as you were out, all you wanted was more food!" Yeah, pretty mortifying. Even Maddie had been cringing at that point.
Despite all that, it was needless to say my smaller counterpart could be absolutely terrifying when she wanted to be.
"I cannot believe you!" she snapped as soon as we met up in her room.
"Nice to see you, too," I sighed. As soon as I had gotten her text, my stomach had plummeted to the floor. I'd excused myself from the cheerleader meet-up at a local frozen yoghurt bar and hurried back to the campus. Who knew what Maddie would do when she was this mad? She rarely ever cursed, much less send furious texts telling me off. It was very unsettling.
Maddie's eyes blazed angrily behind her glasses. She held up her phone. "I can tell her any second." I looked at the screen. Alice was the very first contact on the messaging list. I felt sick to my stomach. "But I won't. Maybe. Look, Amelia," Maddie continued. I flinched. We never called each other by our full names. "I have no idea what possessed you to think stealing this was a good idea-"
"I didn't steal it!"
"-But Alice was worrying her ass off over this thing for days because she didn't want you to ever get ahold of what was in it, and guess who fucking took it? Hmm?" She waved the journal in my face. Never has looking at a rainbow-maned unicorn made me feel so ashamed of myself. "What'd you think of what you read, Amelia? Was it exactly what you wanted? Are you happy now?"
I pushed her hand away. "I didn't steal it!" I repeated. Maddie narrowed her eyes and put her hands on her hips. "I didn't! Someone gave it to me!"
"Oh really?" She sounded unconvinced. "Who? The book fairy?"
"I'm serious!" I sighed. "I didn't mean to read it. I was just curious."
Maddie glared at me. "This isn't how you get into a relationship. This is the exact opposite, in fact." She tossed the book onto the bed. I wanted to be as far away from it as possible at that moment. "I'm really pissed off, y'know? I can't believe I was trying to get Alice with someone who has read every single personal thing she's ever thought. That makes me the asshole here." She rubbed her face.
I glanced down at the journal. If objects were like people, that damn thing would be laughing at me. "So, when are you gonna give it back to her?"
She eyed me carefully, as if she were trying to figure out what I was thinking. Maddie was pretty good at reading people. I squirmed under her gaze. "No," she said, much to my surprise. "I'm not. You are."
My eyes grew huge. She was insane! "I'm what? You can't possibly make me go give this back to her!"
Maddie raised her eyebrows. "Oh really? And why not?"
I threw my arms up in the air. "Well, it'll look bad if I gave it to her! I have something going with her! I can't ruin that, Madeline. I don't know what I'd do."
She didn't look moved at all. "The longer you wait, the more suspicious she'll get when you give it back to her," she said simply.
Oh, hell no! I couldn't just waltz up to Alice and give her that journal back! "Hey, you know how you thought I'd taken this from you? I didn't, but here, I just happened to get it from someone else and I might've maybe read, like, the whole thing."
Yeah. That would go swimmingly. Because Alice wouldn't freak out at all.
"I can't do it," I said weakly.
Maddie crossed her arms slowly. She sighed and shook her head. "Well, you took it, you get to give it back. I suggest doing it soon." She opened the door and looked at me, her eyes basically telling me to get the hell out. "You can't lie to someone you're in love with forever, Amelia. You're just digging a massive hole for yourself."
I grabbed the book and dragged myself out the door, my sister's glare hot on my back as I made the walk of shame back to my room.
There was no way I could ever give Alice the thing back in person, but maybe...