Ready? Not Really.. (Fem USUK) •IN EDITING•

Alice

I twisted the fabric of my dress sleeve anxiously, walking down the hall to the stairwell. My feet ached from dancing on my toes, which was strange since I had long grown used to the feeling. I knew my face was red. I could feet it. Sweat dripped down my sides, and I wiped my hand across my forehead. Two dances in one night was not the best idea, but it was worth it.
"Hey!" someone called out. I turned and looked behind me.
"Hi?" I couldn't recognise who they were. Some girl with curly brown hair and dancing green eyes. Her clothes were oddly casual for the occasion, which annoyed me slightly. "Do I know you?"
"Nope!" She grinned and put her hands behind her back. "I just wanted to say congrats! You did awesome!"
"Oh." I smiled back nervously. Who was this chick? She was way too peppy for my liking. "Thanks. You're too kind."
"No problem!" I turned to walk away, but she touched my shoulder. I jumped in surprise. "Hey, good luck!"
I frowned and shook my head. "With what?"
"You know," she said simply before walking away, her heels clicking against the tile floor.
Okay... Weird.
~•~•~•~
I shifted through my bag for a makeup wipe or something to get all the shit off my face. I felt like I was wearing a mask with all of the foundation and blush piled on my cheeks. Finally, I found the pack of wipes and sighed in relief. Good, I could actually breathe when I got all this junk was off.
No one was left in the dressing room after the one girl was taken to the hospital. The studio she danced at must've had a lot of people, because at least ten different routines had been cancelled because of the girl. Fine with me. I got to perform earlier and get it over with.
"Alice?" a tentative voice called from the doorway of the room before I had a chance to actually take off the crap on my face. I turned and immediately started to smile against my will. I must've looked so dumb. My smile was always so pained looking. I hoped she wouldn't put too much thought into it.
"Hey, Amelia," I said. She hesitated once she stepped into the room, but soon, she approached me slowly. Amelia looked beautiful. I hadn't had a chance to actually look at her, but the dress she was in was absolutely stunning. It was red and hugged her hips almost seductively. Her legs were long and disappeared into her dress. I wanted to know where her dress stopped and her body began. I felt mildly turned on, and I tried to shake the feeling away. I had to focus.
"Hi." God, she was wearing her stupid letterman. Moron.
"Hello."
Amelia rubbed the back of her neck with one hand, the other stashed behind her back. "You, um, did really good."
I didn't bother correcting her grammar. Her face was bright red already. I didn't want to embarrass her. "Thank you," I said. And I meant it. Her opinion was the only one that mattered at the moment. "So you liked it?"
"A lot," she admitted, looking at the ground. "It was.. it was really awesome, Ally."
I nodded. She was acting funny. I knew what was coming but... I was more excited than anything. Amelia just looked terrified. Was I that scary? I really hoped not. "I'm really glad you think that." I stepped closer to Amelia, and her head immediately jerked up to look at me.
"I brought you, err, something."
"Oh?" That must've been the surprise Maddie mentioned. "What?"
"Just close your eyes." Amelia straightened up and looked at me. Her eyes were huge and her pupils were dilated. Was she feeling alright?
"Why?"
"Just do it, Alice."
I rolled my eyes before closing them, clasping my hands together tightly. She took a few steps closer to me before hesitating. Silence quickly overtook us. I was about to question what was wrong when a graceful of something soft smothered me. "Amelia!" I shouted, flailing to find her hands. "What the fuck?"
"You can open them now, by the way," she said, some of her usual humour finding its way into her voice. I wanted to smack her, but I removed whatever the hell was on my face and stared at it. A bouquet of roses was in my hand. Red and white flowers that smelled sweeter than any I had ever sniffed. The paper the stems were in crinkled in my hands.
"Oh my god," I murmured. "They're so beautiful, Amelia."
She looked pleased with herself. "That's why I was late," she explained quickly. "I'm so sorry, Alice. I really wanted to see your first dance, I swear, but I couldn't get here in time and I'm just really sorr-"
"It's fine," I interrupted her, throwing my arms around Amelia's neck. She instantly stiffened, but soon relaxed and hugged me back. I felt her lips press against my shoulder, and I couldn't help but shiver. "It... it wasn't that great. One of the girls tripped and almost landed on me."
Amelia laughed softly. "I'm sure you still did perfect." She held me tighter. I never wanted to let go of her. Not in a million years. Amelia's body was warm, and she had her hand pressed against my back in a comforting way. "You're always perfect, you know."
I felt my cheeks grow warm. I was suddenly glad that Amelia couldn't see my face. "I'm hardly perfect."
"No," she said, breaking away from me. My body instantly felt uncomfortably cold. Her hands found their way to my shoulders. "You're the most perfect person I've ever met, Alice."
I gripped my flowers and looked away in embarrassment. "I'm not. Really."
"I-" Amelia paused and looked around. I was suddenly aware of how large the room was. I felt overexposed, like someone would walk in and see us any second and ruin it all. "Can we go somewhere else?"
She's going to take you somewhere quieter, Maddie's echoed through my head. My stomach somersaulted nervously.
"Yeah," I said. "If you want." I racked my brain for any place I could think of that seemed quieter. "There's a room somewhere around here with a piano. I think it's a practice room for routines that have live music playing."
"Okay," Amelia said. "That's fine."
I nodded and grabbed her hand, tugging her along to the hallway opposite from where she came in. There were a few small rooms that were insulated so that they were perfectly soundproof and isolated. I was terrified, of course, to be isolated with Amelia. I didn't want to fuck anything up. Hopefully, she would do most of the talking so I didn't have to say anything that would freak her out.
The room I lead her in was one-third piano, two-thirds room. It wasn't a horrible setup, just a little awkward considering she probably wouldn't want to be in my face or leaning against a giant instrument when she was confessing. Confessing. Oh, god, I was hardly ready at all. Amelia closed the door softly behind me, taking a deep breath and scratching her head.
"Where'd you get the roses?" I asked, trying to stay calm.
"Some girl in a little corner shop," Amelia explained. She kept messing with her hair, even though it was tied tightly into a bun. I kept glancing down at her dress. It was low enough where I could see the curve of the top of her breast. I just couldn't control myself.
"You look really good," I said quietly, forcing myself to look away.
Amelia seemed surprised. "Really? I thought I looked fat."
I frowned and glanced back up at her. "You... When have you ever looked fat? That's ridiculous."
She stayed silent. Ugh, I'd have to lead her on, wouldn't I? I set my flowers down on the piano bench. "You look wonderful, Amelia. Really."
"So do you," she said. Amelia took a step closer so that I had to look up to see her eyes. She placed her hand on my cheek and gently rubbed her thumb across it. I took a shaky breath and leaned into her palm. "You covered your freckles?"
"Yeah," I whispered. My legs were trembling. Just fucking say something meaningful, I thought angrily. To myself or to Amelia, I didn't know.
"I like them, though," she murmured. Amelia leaned forward and pressed a kiss against my cheek. I gripped her shoulders and sighed.
"Why did you come down here?" I asked, screwing my eyes shut when she wouldn't take her lips away from my face. Warmth spread across my cheek. I had to keep myself from jumping her and kissing her senseless.
Amelia paused for a second. "I..." She rested one hand on my hip while she dug in her pocket for something. "I just wanted to, um, say something." I opened my mouth to speak, but Amelia shook her head quickly. "Please don't say anything until I'm done. It's so hard to do already."
I watched her take a crumpled up ball of paper from her pocket. She took her hand off of me and tried to unfold the paper, but she was shaking so bad that it took much longer than it should have. Amelia swallowed heavily and wiped her hands on her dress. "Okay. Okay, just... listen, alright?" she stuttered. "You can say yes, if you want, but nothing else!"
I nodded a little. She was being extremely childish, but she was the braver of the two of us to be able to do this... "Alright." I smiled at her reassuringly, but Amelia was too embarrassed to look me in the eye.
"Okay." She took a deep breath and held my hand loosely in hers. "'Alice,'" she read, her voice trembling. "'So I have some... something to tell you.'" I smiled more and nodded again. "'All those years I...'" Amelia looked frustrated with herself and shook her head. "'I...'" She made a noise in aggravation and let the paper go, the crumpled thing floating to the ground. I didn't realise I was watching it fall until Amelia out her hands on my shoulders, her grip strong but not enough to hurt me. "I didn't mean anything I ever said," she blurted out. "I... I was a stupid, hormonal little kid and I didn't know what I was thinking at the time. I didn't want to make you cry or anything, y'know? Maddie always told me when you went one crying so I would feel bad and I would start crying because I didn't ever want you to be hurt. I was so angry that you were so strong that I couldn't get through to you."
My chest tightened. I looked away then back at Amelia, unsure of what to say. "Ame-"
"No, I said don't talk. I want to fucking do this and not have to do it again because I swore to myself I was never going to hurt you ever again." She sighed and hung her head. "I, um, told the other cheerleaders to do it because I was mad. I wanted to feel something and I wanted to be angry, I didn't want to like you. I told them all this shit about you because if you made friends, you'd be happy, and I didn't want you to be happy with anyone else but me- well, okay. Or Maddie, but that was okay."
I frowned and shook my head, not sure what she was getting at. "Amelia, we were kids. It isn't your fault for having that mindset."
She didn't tell me to stop that time. "It was my fault, though. You never instigated anything. It was all me, Alice." Amelia's bottom lip trembled, and her hands moved to hold my face. "I'm so sorry. I'm so, so, so sorry. I hate myself for doing any of that to you. You're too good of a person for anything I ever did to you."
"It's okay," I said softly. "I forgive you. I did a while ago." I rested my hands on top of hers and laced our fingers together. Amelia looked irritated.
"I don't want you to say it's okay," she insisted. "It isn't okay. I shouldn't have done it. Just say you accept my apology."
"I do." I smiled. "Accept it, I mean."
Amelia nodded. "Okay. Okay, thank you." She sighed shakily and laid her forehead on my shoulder. "God, that was impossible."
"Is that it?" I asked, my heart still pounding so hard that I was positive she could hear it.
Amelia laughed breathily and shook her head. "No. I still have more talking to you. This time you aren't allowed to say anything. Period. Not until I'm done."
I ran my hand through her hair, wishing I could see her face. Was she really this nervous? I never imagined having any such effect on anyone. "I won't," I promised.
"Good." Amelia backed away from me. I reached out to touch her, but she avoided my hand. "It's really hard to do, Alice. Please." I dropped my arm. She nodded and rubbed her arm sheepishly. I waited for a moment, but Amelia was taking a really long time. She was beginning to get extremely frustrated with herself as she continued to open and close her mouth. "So, ah... Jesus, why is this so fucking difficult?"
"You can tell me anything," I said, taking a step closer. "I won't laugh or anything. I promise I'll listen."
Amelia glanced up at me. She hesitated before taking the extra step and smashing her lips against mine. I froze in surprise, but she already had her hands on my hips. I weakly put my hands on her shoulders and messed with the lapels of her letterman. She sighed softly, her chest expanding and pressing against mine. Amelia broke away, but she kept holding me. "Maddie told me that it wasn't normal for friends to kiss each other," she murmured, looking away.
"It really isn't," I agreed with a small smile.
"Or sleep next to each other."
"Well..." Amelia looked at me, and I shrugged. "Not unless you're touchy-feely friends."
"We aren't. At least, we're not supposed to be. Not you, especially. You don't even like when Maddie hugs you."
I nodded slowly. "Okay, but what are you getting at?"
Amelia looked at the ceiling and closed her eyes for a second before looking back at me. "I, um... Alice." I gripped her jacket tighter. "I..." She had to look at the ground before speaking. "You're perfect, Alice. And... I think you're beautiful. Every single day." My face started to heat up uncomfortably. "I look at you and I wonder how on earth anyone can miss what I'm seeing. Your freckles are really cute even though you don't like them, and I really like your eyes. They're so pretty and every time I see the colour green, I start thinking of you." I covered my mouth with my hand. No one had ever told me anything nearly as kind as what Amelia was saying. "And.. and I always knew when to stop teasing you because your smile would go away and I just can't live without you smiling. It- I.. Whenever I feel bad or angry, I just look at your smile and I remember how much I want to keep it on your face forever."
"Amelia-" I started.
"No," she mumbled. "I'm not done." Amelia kicked at the ground with her shoe- was she seriously wearing sneakers?- before she spoke again. "I, um... You're always on my mind, Alice. I wanted to sit next to you in math so I didn't have to be any farther away from you then we already were. Not physically, but... Anyways, I always think about you. Not like creepy or anything, I swear! You're just always on the back of my mind. I see a shirt and think 'oh Alice would look nice in that' or look at some flowers and think 'I wonder if Alice would like this' and I can't stand not being able to ask you. I don't want to just think about you. I want to be able to tell you everything. Everything I think and everything I feel, I want you to know."
"Then do it," I breathed, pulling her closer. "Tell me everything. Please, Amelia. Please."
Amelia stared down at me and cupped my cheek in her hand. Her eyes were huge, and I could see the redness quickly spreading across her cheeks. "I'm in love with you, Alice Kirkland. I have been for years, and I probably will be for a long time."
I laughed and covered my mouth with both of my hands, stepping away from her and nodding. I couldn't keep myself from giggling and grinning like an utter fool. Amelia look surprised, as if she didn't expect that reaction at all. "Oh my god," I whispered. "Oh my god."
"I- um..." she shoved her hands in her pockets and stared at her shoes. "I don't..."
"Oh my god! Thank you!" I screeched, running forward and throwing my arms around her. Amelia stiffened but quickly hugged me back, holding my tight against her chest. "Oh my god, Amelia! Oh my god."
"You keep saying that but I don't understand," she said desperately. Her hands were trembling against my back. I laughed more and kissed her on the cheek.
"Jesus Christ, Amelia. You stupid fool." She looked in shock for a second, but I kept smiling. "I've been in love with you for almost ten years, genius. It took you long enough."
"Oh," she said. "Oh." Amelia's face turned beet red. "Ten- Really?"
"Yes, really! God!" I kissed her cheeks over and over again, standing on my tiptoes so I could kiss her forehead. "I know Maddie told you!"
"Well, I didn't believe her!" Amelia rushed. "I thought she was leading me on!"
"I did, too!" I grinned and ran my hands through her hair. Amelia started to smile back, obviously getting that I was just as happy as she was. "She told me you loved me but I thought I had no chance with you."
"She what?" Amelia groaned. "I told her not to do that! Like, four bazillion times!"
"She did," I giggled. "Every single day. To make me feel better, I thought."
"Jesus- Well, I don't feel better! My twin is a little snitch!"
I shook my head. "I don't care. Just- I don't!" I pressed my lips against Amelia's, and she kissed me back immediately. She smiled, and I could feel her cheeks lift up against my face. We stayed kissing for longer than usual. When we broke apart, we were both panting and smiling.
"Um," Amelia started. "So, what do we do now?"
"You ask me out," I told her simply.
"I what?" Amelia's eyes widened. "I just spilled my guts out to you! You do it!"
"No, I have been waiting for ten damn years, Amelia Jones. You're doing it." I couldn't keep my hands off of her. I ran them along her shoulders and kept reaching up to touch her cheek.
Amelia laughed and shook her head. "Fine. Alice Kirkland?"
I stopped touching her and tried to control my smile. "Yes, Amelia Jones?"
"Please, will you be my girlfriend?" she asked, her eyes shining.
I took a long pause just to annoy her until neither one of us could take it anymore. Amelia was squirming and grinning, looking more alive than she had ever before. "Of course I will," I said.

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a/n
NO IT'S NOT THE END