Ready? Not Really.. (Fem USUK) •IN EDITING•

Amelia

a/n
when u love writing romance but despise the couples in ur school that decide to kiss and hold hands around u
i am a walking contradiction, i s2g
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Never in a trillion years would I expect Alice Winslow Kirkland to be up before eight o'clock in the morning. It was a world record, I tell you. She was known to be late to her first periods with frizzy hair and a half drank tea in hand.
But now there was my hand in her hand, which I think was a pretty good alternative.
Alice yawned loudly. "I cannot believe you do this every single day. I would die if I had to wake up this early for dance."
I smiled slightly. She hadn't woken up at all. Her eyes were screwed up against the early morning sunlight, and her hair was sticking up everywhere.
I had convinced her to walk with me to my favourite coffee place ("Why not just take your car?" "It's a warmup, dude! Maybe you'll wake up more!"). It wasn't too far from the campus. In fact, it sat pretty much on the edge of school and freedom. They served tea, which I think is all that Alice cared about.
Alice shivered and huddled closer to me. "We should've drove."
"Nah," I said simply. Her hand was freezing. I cupped my hands around hers and rubbed them together to warm her up. "Christ. How did you forget to bring a jacket?"
She shot me a look. "Well, my brain doesn't turn on until ten." Alice gripped my hand tighter. "It would've been nice, though."
Wait.
Wait.
Ding, ding, ding!
Good idea!
"You could borrow mine," I suggested. Nice, Ames. Be super chill, and maybe you'll come off as more than a girl that has a mega crush on her. "
Alice looked at me in surprise. "I couldn't."
"Yeah you could!" I let go of her hand to start to shrug off my coat.
"No, shit, Amelia." She took a step back. "You'll be the one that freezes, then, you idiot!"
I could care less about freezing. I wanted her to wear my damn coat. It would be another step towards establishing a semi-normal relationship with her. Dating couples wore each others clothes all the time! Well, we weren't dating, but I thought we were pretty close!
"I'll be fine," I said. "It'll get warmer after I walk for a while." I wrapped my coat around her shoulders. It was a letterman jacket, actually. The one I got from cheering for all of high school. My name was stitched over the heart.
But, damn, it looked way better on Alice.
Her cheeks flushed red... Probably from the cold, though. "Thanks," she mumbled.
"Yeah."
Alice put her arms through the sleeves before holding my hand again. "If you catch a cold, I am going to be furious."
I smiled. Typical. "Okay."
"I'm serious."
"I know, Ally."
~•~•~•~
The coffee shop was pretty empty when we got there.
Since it was so close to our school campus, most of the customers were students, and since it was so early...
No students.
Well, there was a guy on his laptop in the corner, and a girl with her hair shaved on the sides had headphones in. Other than that, it was me, Ally, and the barista.
Me and Ally. I squeezed her hand tight, and she squeezed right back.
"Let me guess, you're British and want your leaf water," I said.
Alice glared at me. "I hope you aren't referring to tea."
I grinned. "What if I am?"
"Well, you can drink your milk with beans," she shot back. I couldn't help but laugh, which just upset her more. "Shut up!"
I dragged her ass over to the counter. "Stop being a little shit and order your stuff."
The barista smiled at both of us. She was a girl from our school, I think. Her hair was dyed multiple colours. Sorta like a unicorn barfed all over her. "What can I get you two lovebirds?" She asked.
Alice stiffened.
"We aren't dating," I explained quickly. I wish we were. "Just friends."
"Yeah," Alice agreed. My heart ached. I wished she wouldn't be so quick to shoot down everyone that thought we were dating. Maybe wait, like, ten more seconds before correcting them. The barista raised her eyebrows, but didn't say anything else about the subject. She instead just asked what we wanted.
By then, Alice had drifted to a table by a window. She seemed pretty spacey that morning. I watched her for a second before I realised the barista was still waiting for me to order.
"Oh, shit, sorry." I turned back to the menu and rambled off my usual order without thinking. "And a green tea," I added, glancing back over at my crush by the window. The light caught her hair just right so that the blonde locks looked like they were on fire. I felt a tap on my shoulder.
"That'll be seven dollars," the barista repeated. I mumbled an apology and pulled out a ten. As she dealt out the change, she smiled at me. "I can tell you love her," she said quietly. "You both love each other. It's sweet. I haven't seen a couple this infatuated with each other in a while."
I felt my face heat up. "Please don't talk about it to her," I begged. "I haven't told her. I don't know how." Why I was telling this girl my feelings, I have no idea. Maybe I was just tired of hiding them from Alice. Maybe it was because I was still half asleep. Either way, I did it, and I felt a little better afterwards.
She smiled more. "Your secret is safe with me. I'd tell her soon, though. You don't want to lose her." Without saying anything else, she turned her back and started to brew my coffee.
I sighed and walked back over to Alice. She had sat down and was staring out at the street.
"Hey, space cadet," I greeted. I sat across from her.
Alice glanced at me. "Space cadet?"
"You're pretty spacey, dude. You got a admit it." I traced little circles on the back of her hand with my finger. Her eyes lingered on me.
"I suppose," she said quietly. "What were you talking to that girl about?"
I panicked for a second. "Coffee?"
Alice looked unimpressed. "That was quite a riveting conversation about bean milk."
I shrugged. "You never know."
We sat in silence for a few minutes with just the sound of the coffee machines whirring in the background. I weaved my fingers between hers. Her hand was warm in mine. Alice's gaze drifted back to the window.
My stomach churned anxiously. I could do it right now. I could tell her I was in love with her and that, even if she didn't feel the same, I still wanted to be her friend. The worst thing she could do was say she didn't feel the same, right? I would probably die on the inside, but I wouldn't know if I never told her.
It was so close, on the tip of my tongue. I love you, Alice. I just had to open my mouth and say it, fucking say it.
My throat felt constricted.
I couldn't. I just couldn't.
I leaned across the table and turned her face towards mine. Before she had a chance to ask me what I was doing, I kissed her on the lips. She stiffened for a second, but her hand squeezed mine tight. I felt her press back into the kiss.
We were in public, sure, but it felt like we were the only people in the world.
The guy on his laptop grunted at the thesis of his essay and angrily punched the backspace button.
The girl with the shaved hair and headphones hummed along to her music.
And Alice and I just kissed each other in the corner of the little shop, the smell of coffee and vanilla wrapping around us and creating a world for just us.
She broke away after a second.
"Sorry," I murmured.
"Why do you keep saying that?" Alice asked.
"I'm not good with words."
She rolled her eyes and kissed me on the cheek. Her lips stayed pressed against my face a few seconds longer than they should've. Everything she touched felt like it was on fire. "You're a dolt." Alice sat back in her seat. "All you do is talk."
"I never say anything meaningful," I admitted. I don't know where any of this came from. Never did I plan to tell Alice about my insecurities. I didn't even acknowledge the fact I had insecurities.
She didn't seem to know the weight of what I said. "I don't think so," she reassured me. "I think you can say meaningful things. You just don't because you want to seem cool or whatever." Alice traced the wood grain patterns on the table, looking vaguely embarrassed. "But yeah."
I smiled at her even though she wasn't looking at me. I really wished I could admit how much she meant to me. "You really think so?"
"Order for Amy and Alice?" the barista called out. Alice glanced up at me, and the corners of her mouth lifted up in a small smile.
I got up and went to retrieve our drinks. "Thanks," I said, taking both of the cups. I wrinkled my nose when I caught a whiff of Alice's tea. It actually smelled like a plant. Christ, she was weird.
"You two are so cute together," the barista said again, beaming happily. She kept her voice low, and I was pretty thankful for that.
"Okay." I was a little embarrassed.
"You said you're friends, but you kissed her?" She leaned against the counter. "What's up with that?"
I shrugged and lifted my cup as a gesture. "I don't know. It happened."
She rolled her eyes. "'It happened.' You two need to happen." The girl turned away and took out a rag to clean the machines with. "Have a good day."
"Yeah..."
I shut up since Alice had made her way over. "Thank god," she said, taking her cup. "I was dying over there. I cannot wake up." Alice took a little sip. She looked really cute when she did. Her eyes closed and she held her cup in both hands like it was the most fragile thing.
"It smells weird," I commented.
"You smell weird," she shot back without missing a beat.
"You're really creative today." I hooked my arm through hers and led her away from the counter. The girl working was nice, but I wanted everything I said to Ally to be just between us. She was mine.
That sounded weird.
I wanted her to be mine. That was better. Ish.
Alice rolled her eyes. "Like you're ever any better."
I bumped her shoulder with mine. "You're an asshole." She just smiled smugly and took another drink of her tea.
After a while, I managed to pry one of her hands away from her cup, and we walked hand in hand back to the campus.