My mother came over twenty minutes after I called her. As soon as I saw her face, I broke down into tears again.
"I'm sorry for bothering you." I said. Apologizing to her was like a reflex now. I was constantly apologizing.
"I'm sorry I got a B on the test."
"I'm sorry I'm not perfect like Melissa."
"I'm sorry I brought a gun to school."
"I'm sorry I'm suicidal."
My mom brought me into her arms. I kept crying, and she waited for me to stop to ask what was wrong.
"Honey, what happened? Are you alright?" She asks.
I didn't know how to do this. I wasn't able to come to my mom for my teenage problems. My mom never let me in like she's doing now.
I shook my head. "Hanna hates me now." I say, finally getting the words out.
"Aw, sweetie, everything's going to be alright." She assures me. She was so calm. I have never seen her act like this.
She was actually... Nice.
----
Toby returned home from work, shortly after my mom left.
"Hey, babe." He says and kisses the top of my head.
I'm so tempted to tell him about what happened. He's probably not interested. He was talking about how exhausted he was.
I didn't want to burden him with my problems.
"What do you want for dinner? I was thinking we could get take-out or something," I mention, trying to find something for us to talk about.
"Actually, I think I'm going to skip dinner. I'm exhausted." He says and kisses me.
"That's fine," I lie, "go get some rest." I say, getting up from the couch and kissing him. He's a lot taller than me, so I had to stand on my tiptoes to kiss him.
----
Toby was fast asleep when there was a knock at the door. Nobody told me that they would be coming over.
A tall brunette is standing at the door when I answer. God, she's gorgeous. She looks like she could be a supermodel. An athletes body, but with perfect curves. Almond shaped, brown eyes.
"Hi, does Toby live here?" She asks. How does she know Toby?
"Yeah, he does." I say, suddenly insecure. This beautiful, model-material girl comes over looking for Toby. Meanwhile, I look like a mess. Well, I didn't look terrible, but I felt like a mess standing next to this girl. She was so flawless, and I could tell it was all natural. She didn't look like she was wearing any makeup. Perfect skin, perfect features, perfect everything.
The girl smiles, "I'm Emily. I work with him, and he left this on his desk," she says, reaching into her pocket and pulling out Toby's wallet.
"Thanks. I'll give this to him." I say, grabbing the wallet from her.
I almost close the door when she says something.
"Are you his roommate?" She asks.
Wow. Roommate. Toby didn't even mention me to her.
"I'm his girlfr- fiancé." I say, wanting to make sure she knew that Toby was not available.
"Right! He told me he had a girlfriend. Toby and I are pretty close."
Emily suddenly realized how she sounded. "Oh my god! I'm not into- no. No way." She says, shaking her head.
I fake a laugh. "It's okay."
"I mean, you have nothing to worry about." She assured me. That made me feel even more uneasy. It was like she was hiding something.
"Are you sure about that?" I suddenly ask, no longer intimidated by her. I needed to know now if she was interested in Toby or not.
"I'm definitely sure... I don't like boys."
I suddenly realized how much of an ass I sounded like.
"Oh, fuck! I'm so sorry." I say.
Emily laughs a little. "It's fine. Besides, Toby is definitely not interested in anyone else. He won't stop talking about you."
I smile. "Really?" I ask.
I invite Emily in.
"Definitely! It's mostly 'My girlfriend is so beautiful' and 'My girlfriend is a genius'." She says.
Emily goes on to tell me about her and her girlfriend, whose name was Yvonne.
Emily's voice must've woken Toby up, because soon after, he appeared in the living room.
"Hey, beautiful," he says before he notices Emily, "oh, hey Emily. What are you doing here?"
"You forgot your wallet," I say and give him his wallet, followed by a quick kiss on the lips.
"I have an idea," Emily says, "why don't Yvonne and I come over for dinner one night? We can all get to know each other better!"
We agree and arrange a date: next Saturday.