Let's Not Talk About Tomorow

Ben

The cold wind caressed my cheek and ran its chilling fingers down my spine. I shivered and pulled my coat around me tighter. Loud conversation filled the streets we walked, I kept to myself. Jon, however, was happily chatting away to his sisters. He's come so far in just a few days, I'm so proud of him.

"Hey, man" James said as he lagged behind to wait for me to catch up "Are you okay?"

"Huh?" I looked up from the pavement that I had been engrossed in "I'm good, you?"

"I'm okay, I guess" He sighed

"What's up?" I scanned his features, he looked down and depressed. It's a facial expression I'm used to now and not for the right reasons. "You look pretty down"

"4 years ago, my wife gave birth to a girl. She was our third child, she was called Grace. She was perfectly healthy and happy... but then she got sick. She died on this exact date two years ago" I stopped in my tracks and hugged him tightly. "Do you know how hard it is to tell your 7 year old son why his sister isn't here anymore? It's so fucking hard, he was only 5 at the time. He doesn't understand!" He let out a choked sob.

"What's your son called?" I asked

"Jesse"

"How's Rosie?" Rosie was his eldest child

"She's great! God, she's 16 next week"

"Wow! Time flies!"

"It does, Christ, I can remember the day I met her like it was yesterday"

"I'm sorry about Grace, she deserved to live. Call your wife later, talk to her about it"

"I will, thanks, Ben" We let go of each other an resumed walking as though nothing had happened.

The others were extremely far ahead of us, even from this distance I could tell Jon was panicking slightly. Crap. I sped up my pace until I was jogging. He had wrapped his skinny arms around his torso, he must be freezing. He had refused to put on his coat, insisting he was boiling. I knew he was lying but it was never a good idea to force him to do something. His face crumpled as he held out his arms like a toddler wanting to be picked up.

"What's wrong?" I tilted up his chin to look at me "Don't cry, princess"

"Y-you, w-w-weren't th-there" He stuttered

"I'm so sorry, baby, I was talking to James. Are you cold?" He nodded. I shrugged off my coat "Here" He gladly accepted my offer and snuggled up into my coat. I gritted my teeth, regretting my desicion as the icy air enveloped my bare arms. "Are you okay? Do you want to go home?" He nodded again

"H-how long have w-we been out?" He asked

"About 3 hours, baby" I stroked his cheek "You've done so well, I'm so proud of you"

"Everything okay?" James asked breathlessly after he'd caught us up

"Jon wants to go home, will you tell the others for us?" James nodded and waved us goodbye before jogging to catch up with the others. I picked Jon up and walked at a steady pace.

"I wish I found some better sounds no one's ever heard" I sang quietly "Sing to me, princess"

"I wish had a better voice sing some better words" He mumbled

"I wish I found some chords in an order that is new"

"I wish didn't have to rhyme every time I sang"

"I was told when I got older all my fears would shrink"

"But now I'm insecure and I care what people think"

We carried on singing various songs until we reached the house. I shifted Jon onto my hip so I could unlock the door. Once we inside, I set him down on the stairs and unlaced my shoes before stepping out of them and slotting them neatly on the shoe rack. Jon did the same before tugging me into the living-room and pushing me down on the sofa so he could sit on my lap.

"Breathe" I murmured in his ear "You're so tense, princess"

"Can I have a massage?" He asked eagerly "Please?!"

"Sure" I chuckled "Lay on your front" He practically threw himself down onto the sofa, craning his head around to look at me. I sat astride his ass and upper thighs "Am I too heavy?"

"No, it's fine" He assured me. Gently I kneaded into his back, gradually applying more and more pressure. He had a lot of knots that needed to be loosened, which I was more than happy to help with. It didn't take long for him to relax into the sofa, sighing in content."I love you, Benny"

 "I love you too, princess"