Let's Not Talk About Tomorow

Jake

Groaning, I opened my eyes, stretching my half-asleep limbs. The space beside me was cold and empty, Gabrielle wasn't there.

"Hey, baby" A soft voice greeted, stroking through my hair "Did you have a nice sleep?" I nodded and slowly sat up "You should get dressed, dinner will be ready any minute" I got out of bed, Gabrielle gasped.

"What?"

"Your back" She gently ran her hand over the scratches she had left "Do they hurt?" I shook my head. I stepped into my jeans, pulled out a fresh T-shirt as Gabrielle was currently wearing the shirt I had on earlier, and ran a comb through my hair just in time to hear Dad yell for us to come down and eat. Hand in hand, we made our way downstairs, my gaze lingered over the marks I'd left on her neck. She caught me staring and blushed a pretty pink.

Dad and Papa were talking quietly to each other in between mouthfuls of food. A quick greeting was fired our way as we entered the dining room. I couldn't help but feel like thy were talking about me, especially from the way that Dad kept glancing over at me. I just kept my head low and shoveled my dinner down.

"Uh, Ben?" Gabrielle said nervously

"Yeah?" Dad looked over at her

"Could I stay over? I don't think my dad will like Jake anymore if I come home with all these marks" She muttered awkwardly

"Sure, maybe you should call him to say you're staying at one of your girlfriend's houses?" He suggested

"Good idea, I'll call him later"

"Jake, I need to talk to you after dinner" Dad said

"About?" I raised an eyebrow

"You'll find out"

After dinner, when Gabrielle was upstairs calling her dad, I tried to slip away but Dad grabbed my wrist. He indicated for me to sit back down, a stern expression upon his face. God, what have I done now?! I racked my brain for anything I'd done that could be classed as a crime in this household.

"You're not in trouble" Papa said, obviously trying to comfort me.

"Gabrielle came down to talk tome after you two had sex" Dad informed me

"Oh?" I shifted in my chair, unsure as to where this conversation was headed.

"By the way, I hope you made it special for her" He added

"Of course I did, Dad" I assured him, biting the skin around my thumb

"Good. Are you okay?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" I snapped

"Jake" Dad reached out and rested his hand on my knee "Talk to me"

"I just.... feel exposed again.It's not the first time we've been intimate in a sexual way. She's seen me naked before but this time just feels different"

"This is the first time you've made love, Jake, not been fucked by a middle-aged man who paid a lot of money to violate your body. You're allowed to feel like that. Remember when you got out of that place? You didn't even want to speak to anyone let alone be in an intimate relationship. You've come so far, Jake, I'm so proud of you"

"Thanks, Dad. So, what did Gabrielle talk to you about?"

"Your therapist told us that because of your PTSD, when you feel most vulnerable you enter a 'littles' headspace"

"What do you mean?" I frowned

"You start to act and talk younger than you are. You cling to people you love. I've noticed it before, I don't suppose you realise that you call me 'daddy' when you're upset or emotionally distressed. I've caught you sucking your thumb before when you're feeling down-" I abruptly stopped biting my thumb at the mention of that.