I'm F.I.N.E (Demi Lovato)

Secrets ...chapter 57

[ Demis pov ]

As I fell to my knees in tears That I couldn't control , I heard an door open . I didn't know who it was I was so busy crying that I couldn't see .

as soon as I got in the room , I heard the door close . and I heard That sweet loving voice " demi , what's wrong ". ohh Rachel , how much she loved me and how Dylan always said to love herself but he can't do the same .

I looked up at her and she smiled at me . she bent down on her knees infront if me and said " baby.  what's wrong please tell me ".

I just cried more and muttered out " I can't ". she sat on the bed next to me and pulled myself on her lap . I don't know how I wasent  crushing her though !

"Demi what is going on right now ", she demanded . I just cried into the crook of her neck more . my eyes stung from my tears , and my eyes were blood shot .

I just shook my head signifying " no ". she looked at me in eye and said " is it Dylan , did he tell you not to tell me something ?"

I kinda started shaking , completely frozen . fucken puzzled on what to say ! she continued to look. at me , but I wasent planning on answering .

she looked mad now , she muttered under her breath " I'm gonna kill him ". I shot up and said scared " no no , its ok just wait till after your birthday please !"

she still looked mad but confused at the same time " oh my God demi DID YOU FUCK DYLAN !!!!!! "

my eyes grew big and I yelled " NO NO NEVER THAT'S ILLEGAL I'M 20 AND HE IS 15 , THATS JUSR COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY NASSSSTY !!!! "

she looked at me and smiled " sorry demi , that was my first thought ". I looked at her and said " no no , he is like my brother I could never ever never EVEN OHHH GOD RACHEL THATS SOOO NASTY !"

she started laughing and said " what are you saying he is ugly !". I started to luagh and glared at her . she smiled really wide and hugged me .

she looked away and then looked back at me and said " but really demi what's going on , please don't keep secrets ".

I looked at her and said " its not my place to tell you , it'd Dylans . he is going to tell you but just after your birthday . and if he doesn't I will ".

" FUCK , DEMI JUST FUCKEN TELL ME " , she said with our ant hesitation . I just shook my head " I can't rach you don't understand ! he dosent want you to worry ! he dosent want to ruin your birthday ! "

she shot back directly at me " well now I'm gonna worry all day until tomorrow , yea That sounds a whole lot better !".

Noting her sarcasm , she had an point . to make her worry today until tomorrow . then she is just gonna worry some more ! it dosent make any sence now !

I don't know what to do now ! I was thinking of what to say when rach cut them short by saying " you can leave now ".

I looked at her shocked but she has no emotion on her face . she looked at me , and I got the hint . to leave ...

I got up and kissed her cheek , " I'm sorry Rachel ". she just stared at blank space and slowly got in bed . she covered her head with pillows and stayed That way .

I backed out of her room and closed the door . I looked at her door before looking over at Dylans room .

I opened his door and he was still sleeping . just then I called my manger and said "I'm skipping the studio today , family stuff ". he understood and said " ok see ya tomorrow ".

I said bye and threw my phone in my room and wernt down stair . I turned the t.v. on trying to get my mind off of things .

I sat thee for like an hour and it wad awfully quiet in the house . no music , no talking , no nothing .

I didn't like it I felt like everything was closing in on me . I stood up quickly and ran to the door . needing some fresh air . once I got outside I instantly felt better . the cold afternoon breeze hitting my face just felt really good .

plus its fucken summer , we are lucky to get an breeze sometimes . I had felt enough of the air and turned around to go back In .

I went back inside and looked up and saw Dylan in and band shirt sitting on the couch . he looked at me with no emotion . I closed the door and ran to him.  wrapping my arms around his neck .

he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me tight . he sighed and pulled back. he looked up at me and said " did you tell her ".

I shook my head " no. but she is now worried about what it is ". he looked down at the ground and said " I'm going to tell her , I promise I just really don't want to ruin her birthday with my problems ".

I kissed his head and said softly " but now she going to still be worrying about it now , the first thing she thought was that i fucked you ".

his eye grew big and his jaw dropped in disgust . " ewww no Thats eeww your older Than me isn't That illegal ! no God no OHH HELL NO !!!! ".

I looked at him and said " right ! ". he just laughed and said " so do you think I should tell her now ".

" I think you should.  but I really don't know . if you tell hef today she will most likely be worried for the day . but if you tell her after she will worry all day ".

he hung his head Down low and said " this is all my fault , if I wasent such an screw up ". I cupped his face in my hands and said " listen to me ! your not an failure ! you have been through things in life That put you threw obsticalls ( I don't know how to spell That haha ) its not your fault , it was just and stupid mistake . you have to under stand that your not causing pain to people those people are causing you pain !

he began to tear up and I wiped them away . " you have to love yourself , the way we love you ! " he nodded and said " I just don't know anymore I'm sorry ".

" you dont have to be sorry its not your fault ! but we both know you have to tell Rachel . she dosent like secrets being kept away from her ".

he nodded and sighed . I looked at him and said " ill be there with you.  if you want ". he nodded " please , I need support ". I smiled and nodded and kissed his cheek .

and we started to walk upstairs to Rachels room ...