Boston (Book 2 Rob and Caroline)

Fastforward a week

Making it through another week, things are starting to look up as Rob finishes with the PT. We headed into the room to have our annual, remind Rob that he still isn't healed meeting. "So, the question I really have Steve, is can we have sex?" Rob asked "I'm feeling better, I feel stronger every day."

"Rob, three months" I said looking at him shaking my head.

"And she is correct, we can't even evaluate anything till you hit the six week mark" Steve said, "and you can't lift anything over five pounds."

"But I don't need to wake her up every time I go pee anymore, do I?" Rob asked.

"It was about you falling, if you feel comfortable, yes, you don't need help going to the bathroom anymore."

"When do most people feel back to normal?" Rob asked.

"Around a year, but everyone is different"

"And how do you suggest we continue to get closer to our regular lives?" Rob asked looking at him.

"Remove expectations from yourself" Steve said.

"I'd like to cuddle with my fiancé at night, but I can't, I don't think that's too high of an expectation." Rob snapped, then realized his behavior and took a deep breath, "I just want to be back to normal."

"You two could probably go back to light cuddling, my concern is that any time you are in any pain, you have to stop."

"We are not cuddling" I looked at Rob

"No weight bearing activity" Steve said, "and nothing strenuous."

Walking out of the hospital, "that went well," Rob said, putting his hand on top of mine as we drove.

He took my hand in his, squeezing it, but saying nothing. It's nice to feel like at least mentally, I have my partner back.

The thing I miss most is that calming feeling I get out of him holding me. That sense of protection.

"So, let's focus on some long term goals, where are we at?" I looked at him.

"I want to be able to fuck you by your birthday" Rob said bluntly.

"I don't know if that's going to be able to be possible, how about we shoot for cuddling by my birthday" I said as we pulled up and I got out, going into the kitchen to make dinner.

"Babe, we've just got to find some balance here" Rob said sitting down on the couch.

"And that is?" I asked

"I want a real good morning kiss from my fiancé"

"You get a good morning kiss" I said, "every morning."

My phone rang, "babe, I've got to take this."  I walked into our room, it's my therapist.

"So, how are things going?" Sarah asked as I sat on the floor in our bathroom on FaceTime.

"It's been okay, rough, he's finally getting back to himself mentally."

"I assume that considering Rob's condition, you all have not been having sex."

"No, and I have absolutely zero desire to have sex, which I feel guilty about.  Because he's my fiancé and I should want that."

"You're body has trained you to associate sex with negative experiences.  Switching that is going to take time."

"He's so antsy about fixing our sex life.  And it's just not something that I'm very interested in."

"When Rob makes small touches, such as holding your hand, does that bother you?"