Tom's Sky (¡A Tom Hiddleston fanfiction !)

#78

She had magic
In her eyes
Even the stars
Envied...
...

Her eyes were glossy, she wasn't answering any of his questions.

Was that a defence mechanism for all the hurt he had caused her?

He could see there was still some interest, the way she scanned his entire face, words she wasn't saying, she just seemed very distant to let it show.

She was full of thoughts, by the look in her eyes, her mind was traveling far far away from that conversation.

Maybe not that far, but not there with him.

Was she considering the idea of giving up?

Did she gave up already?

He certainly asked her if she still loved him.

A very selfish and unfair question giving the circumstances.

She have said once that she loved him.

He didn't say a word.

Confused.

Hurt, maybe?

Coward, above all.

He wanted to hear her say those words again.

Many times he have heard those words from so many people.

But they were empty, superficial.

Those people only loved what they see on the outside, the casket.

She loved what she knew was in the inside, himself.

But never, never in a millionth time those words were charged with so much feelings like the way she said it that night.

He was desperate to hear her saying it, to know if they were still filled with the same feeling, with the same meaning.

It always was a battle to ask this, it wasn't the first time he asked the same question to her... but she didn't answer.

He could see she was protecting herself.

And he couldn't blame her.

He could blame himself, for that matter.

"Do you still... do you still love me, Sky?" The words left his lips and it felt odd.

He gathered all his strength to maintain a straight face and not to show how desperate he was to know the truth.

The question took her by surprise, her eyes widened and her mouth opened and shut it again.

She looked right into his eyes, maybe trying to decide wether she answer it or not... or if it was best to tell the truth or lie.

It was never good to lie about feelings.

He knew that well more than anyone.

The anticipation was driving him insane.

And her silence was torturing.

But then maybe she was afraid to tell him that she doesn't love him anymore.

And why would she be scared?

If he never told her he loved her.

Her cheeks were strongly painted in a pink shade, ashamed? Shyness? Guilt?

It was never an easy job for him to know what she was feeling.

He knew she felt something but her face was always showing all kind of feelings it was quite hard to decipher if it was good or bad if it was this kind of conversation.