367 🩺 Midnight Thoughts

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In the middle of the night with the moon at its highest, Yunho stared at the ceiling in the dark. Raw with emotion and his head throbbing from crying, he was laying in Mingi's bed, listening to the gentle inhalation and exhalation of the boy's breath beside him.

Mingi had fallen asleep long ago, but Yunho was too emotionally raw to sleep. Although in the past, being so upset had put him to sleep, this time, it was almost like he was past it.

Too many things had happened.

And although the source of his pain had started out with the final decision to leave his course, somewhere through the night, it had morphed... Morphed to his own parents, not being able to do the one thing a parent should have instinctively done.

Acknowledge their child.

It stung to have to ask to be listened to, and realise that they were clueless, even once they'd been told what to do. It was like rubbing salt into an open wound.

But from the moment his eyes had fallen upon Mingi... he knew that there was only one place he felt at home...

Home...

It was not at the address his licence stated.

No. The feeling that washed over him when he was held in Mingi's protective arms... It was unlike anything he'd ever experienced. It was one thing to receive a comforting tap on the shoulder, but it was another to be cradled against Mingi's chest and held in a way that he needed, while he couldn't hold himself, together.

He had come to learn that Mingi had a habit of using whatever was around them to block out the world, covering them up together, and Yunho was beginning to crave it. He felt safe and listened to... Heard... It was like Mingi was surrounded in a bubble, and when Yunho stepped inside, everything outside the iridescent sheen disappeared. It was just the two of them, and the overwhelming feeling of being cared for.

... He wished his parents would give him that same comfort...

And it hurt to know that they never would.

Even if they decided to make an effort, no matter how hard they tried, they would never be able to make him feel as safe as Mingi did, because there was one severe difference between them. It was simple: Mingi was naturally caring, and acted comfortingly without thinking. And his parents...

They simply were not.

Every time Yunho had gone to Mingi, upset or excited or otherwise emotional, he was seen. Mingi used his eyes, and he looked at him, gauging his emotions, and being supportive.

His parents?

He could count the number of times that exact thing had happened in his life... Where they had used their eyes and looked at him...

Zero.

Not a single time.

All his life, even when he was a younger boy, he had memories of achievements he'd been so exhilarated to show them, and not an ounce of reaction was shown.

Like the time he managed to finish his skeleton puzzle as a little boy after months of trying... 'Make sure you put the pieces back in the box and don't loose any, okay?'

Like the time he had managed to successfully make an electrical circuit for a science project at home, after zapping himself repeatedly for weeks... 'Make sure you write your essay on it earlier, rather than later, okay Yunho?'

Or like the time he had graduated school...

And his parents hadn't even turned up to the ceremony, leaving the only two seats in the entire crowd, empty.

That was how it was always going to be.

And he finally realised he would have to just accept that.

It hurt.

Rolling over in bed, he let his tired, sore eyes rest upon Mingi in the dark. He was so calm... still, but at the same time, not still... His chest was moving like rolling waves of the ocean, never staying still as it rose and fell with his breath, but the rest of his body was resting heavily into the sheets under the warmth of the covers.

His bed was only a double mattress, but with his row of stacked books along the wall, it left not much room for two grown men, and so while Yunho's pillow stuck half off of the bed, Mingi's was squished against the books. He was laying on his side, facing him, and his hands were tucked between them, resting against Yunho's side. Their thighs touched, and their ankles were tangled together, and as Yunho decided to roll towards him, more of them began to touch...

Mingi's lungs suddenly sucked in a deeper breath, before he relaxed back, and his hands unknowingly reached out the short distance between them and rested against his chest... But as he did, he rolled closer, and suddenly, their foreheads were almost touching. Both on the edges of their respective pillows, their hair tangled together, and their breath misted between them, and to Yunho, he couldn't think of anything more comforting...

Until he realised that he'd been too busy staring at how peaceful he seemed, and had lost track of his breath...

Mingi's eyes suddenly fluttered open, startling him a little in the night.

'Mmmhr... Have you slept yet?' Mingi whispered hoarsely.

Swallowing, Yunho shook his head against the pillow.

And Mingi pouted a little, gazing across at him with sad eyes. 'Lift your head up for me,' he whispered, surprising him by shuffling closer.

Confused, he did as he was told, almost going cross eyed trying to look at him...

And then Mingi slipped his arm under his head and ushered him closer.

His heart leapt into his throat, thudding suddenly, and as he let himself be brought closer still, he suddenly found himself laying with the entirety of his chest against his side, and his head resting atop his shoulder. His breath became extremely unsteady as he looked up through his eyelashes at him, and as he let his top hand shyly rest atop his chest, his skin began to crawl with the warm jittery feeling of proximity.

'Close your eyes and try to sleep~' Mingi whispered, wrapping an arm around him. Now, not only their ankles, but their legs were tangled together, and every inch of Yunho's chest touched down Mingi's side... From top to toe, he could feel the boy's warmth...

And from top to toe, he felt safe.

Safe enough, to let himself forget his family problems, close his eyes and finally, let his breath calm.

The more he relaxed, the more he felt himself succumbing to Mingi's embrace, melding into him, and as he heard the soft sound of his breath, not yet asleep, the sound was lulling...

'We can talk about it tomorrow,' Mingi whispered, rubbing his back a little.

Yunho let his head rest heavily against him, and although the position was brand new and odd... to rest in his arms laying in a bed... it was one he immediately knew he liked.

He nodded a little against him, hearing the white noise his hair made against his shirt. And as he let his arm fall more across his chest, Mingi suddenly brought the blankets up over their heads.

It was a tent of warmth, with not even the cold air to ruin one's mood.

And for Yunho, that tent was a lifeline he hoped would never, ever, come down.

~~~

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