Broken Promises

Every one has a hard time

Lizzie's POV

I know this has been hard for all of us, and I have treated Y/N bad, I am really trying to not let all my anger out on Y/N but I just can't with this covid thing, this ruins everything, I was supposed to be already married to the love of my life but I am not, I know Y/N is upset about it too, and I'm trying to be there for her and reassure her that I am not getting tired of her, I mean she is the reason I haven't give up, she makes me laugh when I am having a hard time, she is literally amazing with me

She has been thinking about me getting tired of her a lot, but that it's not true and that will never be true I am so in love with that woman, in fact I am afraid she is the one who is getting tired of me, I mean I am always asking her what if something bad happen, and she answers my questions with such a soft tone, she reassures me everyday that we will be fine

Also my garden has been keeping me busy, and I fucking love that, I am really taking care of it a lot and I enjoy it so much, the other day Y/N was here listening to all my ramble about my garden, she said she wanted to learn, and well I know she learnt a few things but she literally was just staring at me and smiling as I was explaining everything to her

I am on my garden and I am thinking about her, where is she? I haven't seen her since this morning that we ate breakfast "Bo" I called Bo who is as always laying on the grass, he came running toward me "Where is mama little boy?" I asked him as I pet him "Can you go search mama for me?" I asked him and it's like he understood me because he went inside the house I am guessing he went to search Y/N

Minutes later Bo came back running, I guess he just went to wander around the house, then I saw Y/N coming toward me, I think he did go for Y/N "Thanks my baby boy" I told him as I give him a head kiss "Were you looking for me? I mean Bo was biting me I didn't understand him but if I didn't move he would bite me and then I started walking and he made sure I was walking toward him" she said and I giggle "I told him if he could search you I guess he really could" I told her and she chuckle "He is very smart" she said as she sits next to me

She gave me a kiss on the head "What did you need my love?" She asked me "I just wanted to see you, I mean I haven't seen you since this morning" I told her pouting making her kiss my lips, I love to pout because that means she will kiss me "I am searching something, did you know the covid vaccine is almost here, that means we can get married as soon as we get vaccinated" she said and I looked at her confused "But that will take a lot of time" I told her not wanting to wait that long

I know we said until this covid thing calms downs but it really seems it will not calm down "Baby covid is still hard, we can't risk, I can't risk us like that" she said softly, I know I can't get mad at her because this is not her fault but this really upsets me "And when will the vaccine arrive?" I asked her "Soon, I mean they said soon" she said as she lays on the grass "Please don't get mad" she murmured but I heard her making me feel bad

I am a really bad fiancée, I cleaned my hands and lay with her "I'm sorry" I mumbled "It's fine my love, just I need you to understand that if it was for me we would be already married but we can't, I don't want you to think that is because I don't want to marry you" she said because the other day I told her that she just didn't want to marry me "I know and I'm sorry it's just this really sucks" I told her and she nods and kissed my head "I know it does baby, I know it sucks" she answered

She went inside because I was going to make a live, I have been more active on my Instagram, I am a boring person though I just show them my garden but they seem to like it so I continue doing it, before ending my live I saw that there were a lot of questions about if I was engaged, so I didn't ended the live wanting to answer some of the questions. I never published a photo telling Y/N and I were dating nor that we are engaged but they already suspect it "Ok some of you are asking if I am engaged, yes I am" I answered as I show the beautiful ring Y/N got me and they went crazy on the comments I decided to go inside the house to look for Y/N