A Tough Choice

Chapter Seventy Nine

"Emma." Ethan said nervously from the doorway.

I jumped and looked up from my paperwork.

"What's wrong?" I asked as I saw a strange look on his face.

"I've been thinking about things and I have managed to arrange you some counselling." he said gently.

"Why?" I frowned.

"Talking to me about it isn't solving the problem and after what happened yesterday, I want to get you the best help." he stated.

"I'm not sure it'll help." I sighed.

"But it's worth a try." he said hopefully.

"If you want me to go then I'll give it a try." I sighed.

I knew that I owed it to him to at least try after everything I'd put him through.

"I'll come with you and wait outside if you want?" he offered.

I nodded slowly.

"When's the appointment?" I asked him.

"This afternoon." he grinned.

"That's quick." I frowned.

"I managed to pull a few strings, plus I thought I'd book it so that it's on my day off." he stated.

"Sneaky." I smiled. I wasn't stupid, he was going with me to make sure that I went. But I still appreciated that he cared. I knew I'd put him through hell and still was, I had to do something to change that, before I ended up dragging him down with me.

"I'd better have a shower and get changed then." I sighed.

His head snapped towards me as he looked at me nervously and raised his eyebrow. I knew instantly what he was thinking.

"Cal's at work so I'll leave the bathroom door open." I reassured him.

"Good." he smiled.

I smiled to myself as I stood in the shower. Ethan had subtly walked past three times already, it was too adorable.

I quickly climbed out of the shower and dressed, I looked up as Ethan entered the room.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah a bit nervous about this counselling though." I admitted.

"It's for the best though." he smiled as he held up my jacket. I smiled and put my arms in.

"We'd better head off." he told me.

I nodded slowly and glanced down as I felt him take my hand. As we walked downstairs I looked up as I heard the front door open, I sighed. Caleb was back from work. I hadn't spoken to him since our conversation in the park.

"Hey, I got Dominoes for dinner." he said cheerfully.

"Great." I said shortly as I walked past him. I was so angry with him, but I couldn't be bothered to talk to him about it. He wouldn't listen anyway. I needed some space from him. I could feel his eyes on us as we left.

"That was frosty." Ethan said when we were in the car.

"I can't be bothered with him after what he's done." I sighed.

"Yeah I know, I feel the same." he admitted.

"Do you want to talk about what happened?" he added.

"Which part?" I frowned.

"The miscarriage, we've never spoken about it and I don't want you to bottle it up." he told me.

"I don't think I'll ever be totally over it, but I'm learning to deal with it." I sighed.

"The worst part is that if I'd been careful things could have been different." I added.

"You can't think like that, the accident happened, nobody was to blame." he reassured me.

"How do you feel about it?" I asked him.

"I'm fine." he said quickly.

"Ethan?" I insisted.

"Well obviously I'm sad about it but it's just something we have to deal with." he said quietly.

"But I don't blame you if that's what you mean." he added.

I sighed and stared out the window as we gradually got closer to the clinic.