Ryan Janae

Show Up and Show Out‼️

Ryan POV

Mom: Ryan honey, it is thursday. You shouldn't be missing an entire week of school." she said as I faced the wall. I didn't respond to her as I stared at my pink wall. I heard her sigh and walk away as another tear rolled down my face.

After the conversation with my mother, my entire world crashed before me. You can call me selfish, immature, bratty, whatever you liked. I honestly didn't care. For the first time, in a long time I had made friends and for the first time in forever I had a boy of my own.

To move for a whole summer, miles and miles away from them hurt on a level I never knew it would. I knew the pain was more so about leaving Reese, I had just opened my heart again after my dad shut it off, and now my mom was making me shut it off again.

It had been four days now, almost going on five and I knew my friends were wondering what was going on with me. Maurice called and texted, but he stopped at a certain point because he was mad. He was mad about me not showing up to his party like I promised and every time I thought about it my heart ached.

I never meant to let him down, I never meant to stand him up. But after my mom told me we were moving again, I couldn't face him, I couldn't face my friends. What the hell was I going to say? I had no words for myself yet, besides angry curse words for my mother and hatred for Mr. James.

My mother worked hard and yes, what Mr. James was offering her was a once and lifetime opportunity for her and I was happy my mom was moving up the ladder, however I was tired.

Tired of moving, tired of never having a place, tired of meeting new people, transferring schools, getting comfortable in new cities. Tired of shutting people out because I knew I would never see them or talk to them, I was tired.

My social life literally started in my Junior Year of highschool, I have no childhood friends, no friends that I grew up with since elementary school, no boys that I kissed on the playground in 1st grade, no favorite teacher bond that last you a lifetime.

I had none of that, and when I had finally developed a feeling for that, it would all be gone come by the end of the semester.

Rolling over onto my back, I wiped the slow tears off of my swollen eyes. There was nothing I could do about it and it was killing me from the inside.

I tossed and turned all day, watching the sun rise and watching the sun fall. My phone buzzed at a few more messages as I looked over at it. It was one from Senia and Nique, opening it I read their messages before turning my phone off and placing it on the counter.

Rolling over to my wall, I heard the sound of two cars rolling into my driveway. I could tell by the music that it was Senia and Nique.

Me: no no no no." I begged as I heard them get out.

I heard their shoes crunching over the graveled pavement as they made their way to my door. Opening the screen door, I closed my eyes tight as they banged on it.

Senia: Ryan!" she called as she banged on the door. I sighed as I flipped over on my stomach and buried my face into my pillows.

I stayed still as they pounded my door, maybe when they see I was not coming, they would leave me the hell ALONE.

The knocking stopped and I sighed in relief, lifting my head up I was about to peer out the window when my phone rang.

Grabbing it off the dresser, I declined Senia as Nique's phone call came through. Declining her, China's phone call came right after hers as I grew frustrated. I declined China's, but just as expected Jania's phone call came right afterwards.