I Will Follow You Into the Dark

CHAPTER 87

Jen pulled on Derek's hand and spun around sexily in front of him. "I want to dance. I need to dance. Dance with me, Dr. Hot," she said invitingly.

"You know I don't dance," he groaned, turning back toward the bar.

Motioning with her head toward where Meredith and Jim were dancing, Jen said, "You do tonight. They dance. We dance."

"Jen.......," Derek started but he could tell by her facial expression that he wasn't getting away with whining about this.

"Fine," he said, "let's dance."

Derek put on his happy father-of-the-groom mask and led Jen out onto the dance floor. She pulled him close, and they danced to the lovely slow music. She knew he was staring at Meredith. She wanted him to be staring at Meredith.

Across the dance floor, Jim noticed the way Derek was looking at Meredith. He pulled her closer and whispered something in her ear. She just put her head down against his shoulder and closed her eyes.

Derek took her pose as a sign of endearment. He watched as Jim held her body and swayed with her to the music. This was killing him. He owed Jen a few more dances, and then he'd just have to leave.

"You OK?" Jen asked, eyeing him carefully.

"Yeah.......no," he whispered back.

"You're not," Jen said matter-of-factly.

"Of course, I'm not," Derek said in frustration. "She has a date."

"You do, too," Jen said, tilting her head and smiling at him.

"I know," he said, pulling her close and whispering, "I owe you forever for this weekend. Thanks for coming."

"I wouldn't have missed it," Jen said as she noticed him staring Meredith's way yet again.

"She's beautiful," she said, knowing he was lost in thought.

"Yeah......"

"She's looking at you, too, Derek."

"Yeah?"

"Go ask her, Derek. Ask her to dance."

"But.........."

"It's time. She's dying for you to ask her. I've been watching her all weekend. She looks at you the way you look at her, Derek. This thing between you is not one-sided."

"But her date.......," Derek began weakly.

"He's not you."

"I haven't even talked to her in months. It's too late. She's moved on. She doesn't want me. She could have asked me to be here with her. I've been stupid for a long time, but I'm not that stupid. It's too late."

Jen just looked at him as if she were preparing to start yelling.

"I can't, Jen. I need to leave or drink or something."

"Derek Michael Shepherd!" Jen said, finally losing her temper. She hissed at him in a loud whisper, "You are not leaving. You are going to march your ass right over there and ask her to dance!"

Derek looked over at Meredith and Jim before looking down at Jen. "I can't."

"You'd better. Or I'll get on that microphone and tell the whole room that you love her."

"You wouldn't," Derek said, knowing how unlikely it was that his words were true.

Jen said nothing but she turned toward the stage. Derek grabbed her elbow and pulled her back toward him. "OK. I'll go. One dance, OK?"

"Fine," Jen said smiling. Derek just stood there frozen in his tracks.

"Derek," Jen said encouragingly, "Go."

"I can't."



If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark



"You're just scared out of your mind. But you can do this," she said, rubbing his arm encouragingly.

"I'm nervous," Derek said, wiping his now sweaty palms on his slacks. "Crap."

Jen leaned over and pulled his chin toward her so that he'd have to look at her, "Your hair is so hot that nobody will notice your stinky, sweaty palms." Seeing him smile a bit, she continued, "Look. I get that you're scared. I know it will kill you if she rejects you or turns you away."

"I know," he said nervously.

"She won't. I can tell," Jen said confidently.

"Really?"

"Trust me, Derek. She'll dance with you."

"OK," he said, trying to believe her.

"But even if she won't dance with you, at least you'll know where you two stand. You deserve to know how she feels and if you can be her friend........or more. It might be your last chance to find out."

"Not helping the nerves here, Jen," Derek said nervously.

"This is too important. You need to know. So stand up straight. Get that charming grin on your face, and take Dr. Hot over to ask the woman of his dreams to dance, OK?"



You and me have seen everything to see
From Bangkok to Calgary
And the soles of your shoes are all worn down
The time for sleep is now
It's nothing to cry about
Cause we'll hold each other soon
The blackest of rooms


Derek still stood frozen in place. "The song is ending. It's time. Go," Jen barked.

"I hate you," Derek muttered.

"And you love her. Do I have to intervene? You know I want to go over and profess your undying love for her."

"Shut up."

"Make me. Go, Derek."

Derek took a deep breath. Well, he actually took a shallow breath, but it was the best he could do. He looked at Meredith and kept his eyes on her as he began the longest walk of his life. It felt as if he were walking toward the gallows.

As Derek approached, Meredith's eyes met his and his throat tightened. A look of panic and fear flashed across her face. Then, oddly, a faint look of hope flickered. Never releasing her from his gaze, Derek strode forward a little more confidently. He knew he was taking a huge risk, but he figured he might as well go all in.

After all...........he'd waited his whole life for this moment.


If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
Then I'll follow you into the dark